i want a relationship

[nick_01]

i feel lonely and am fed up of feeling like this i hate being single am only 25

[ncmurphy1951]

don we all and i am 52

[TC1979]

Single at 34 feels exactly the same mate. It's easy to harbour upon the things we haven't got and its difficult to be proud of what we have got. Although I have just said this I also know that the opposite sex look for certain things but don't always consider that we have so much to offer. Each and every one of us with no exceptions.

[Hidden]

I've lived the greater part of my youth without mingling much. When I have mingled it only served to remind me of what could have been. That in itself is hard to live with...

[formula]

anybody read blogs on here ! i seem repeat myself all the time

[TC1979 in reply to formula]

Ok, fair enough point but I have tried to look back at the posts that you may have commented upon but they seem to have been removed.

[formula in reply to TC1979]

just click on my pic , it will show you all the posts i comment on or have posted when you scroll down going further back !

[thrillseeker]

i feel for you i am 36 feel so alone but yet been single 2 years i am a single dad i say get your self out more if you can, as some people don't like going out mass groups of people i know i don't i am trying to change this but its hard to change what you don't understand , i was only four years old when i was hit by a car and had to learn to walk and talk and suffered a mass of illness well depression set in from early age and went through all my teen years hating life making the wrong choices, but that's more or less because my family didnt know that i was suffering they don't know now but was stopped from doing boxing as was told that any knock to the head could be fatal as i had a massive blow to the head if you wanna contact me via email let me know

[bikerlifestyle]

if you seem desperate then things will be harder,

once you find a way of getting out more then things will change, as has been said before only you can change this, you have to make the effort to get out of your comfort zone and get out and about and meet new people, you will find someone and it will happen when you least expect it.

try online dating be honest and and the worst that can happen is that you are exactly where you are now. its worth a go.

but untill you find a way to socialise more even if that is online, you need to find groups that interest you, and join in, again that's something only you can do.

friends will not come looking for you, neither will girlfriends, its up to you to make it happen.

I like motorcycle, i go to biker rallies and custom bike shows, i have been to places where i haven't known anyone and have come away with some good friends, online life can be a good way to start to meet people, forums, chat facebook pages, but unless you can commit to it, nothing will ever change and yes its going to be hard, yes you are going to feel uncomfortable but that's the price we pay to change

i really hope you find something you can get involved in

[sandi07]

Oh.....to be 25 again! I am double that now, and went through a very painful split... just before I ended up in hospital..........but NOW I realize "Brain Haemorredge" or not...........I got a lot of living to do......Yes It would be nice to meet someone.....but I am not depending on it. I know you might think that us "oldies" don't know what you are talking about.....but believe we were all 25 once too........ The advice from bikerlifestyle is spot on.........just when you are not looking...someone will come into your life.......Wish you well....

[nedulus]

my dear friends, have just read your comments.. it seems spring fever is abound..!!

I can tell you that I am 60 years old, brain impaired and happily single..... but if you feel that you want a relationship, then next time you see someone you like, give them a big smile, you could even say hello... good luck to all who are looking for love

[bikerlifestyle in reply to nedulus]

well that comment made my day

[cat3 in reply to nedulus]

If we had an awards system for the best comment, this would win hands down !

Brilliant, nedulus......brilliant !

cat x

[nedulus in reply to cat3]

glad you liked my comment... I'm a bit of a novice on this site, only started using it today,

[Hidden in reply to nedulus]

nice pos attitude,think i gnarl more than smile..but i love the thinking

[HelenWillmetts]

My injury SAH was relatively recent (Christmas 2012) at the time I was with a lovely man, incredibly loved up and happy. Then a few weeks ago he decided he couldn't handle my injury and bore up with e, I'm mortified and finding it digit o get my end round. Ito, feel like I will nw be single forever! Especially if ome by who knew me before isn't even interested any mre!! Fed up in Bristol!!

Helen

[bikerlifestyle in reply to HelenWillmetts]

its early days yet, things will improve and you will find someone who is accepting of you head injury, don't give up

[Hidden]

Most of you, considering you were older probably be grateful that you at least got to experience normal adult relationships, I have never got to experience a mutually happy relationship with anyone, can't feel emotion, can't feel love, joy, only nothingness.

[bikerlifestyle in reply to Hidden]

i cant remember my wedding which was 4 months prior to my brain injury, nor do i remember emotional memories just factual ones,

my love now is different its not love it what i have to interpret as love compared to what society defines as love, more of trying to pretend that i feel a certain way to remain an active part of the relationship,

you just have to make the best of what you have and adapt somewhat to what is expected of you in a relationship

[Hidden in reply to bikerlifestyle]

That resonates entirely with me. I've never thought of it in that way, to think about it, I don't feel any emotion attached to memories before or after the accident - i've just come to believe that memories are entirely factual in nature and if I do recall what I'd class as "happy" times before or after the accident, I don't feel the emotion one feels when happy. Any form of a relationship is really stressful for me. The stress is to such an extent that I actively avoid them, I even avoid normal social interaction, if a stranger wants my attention, I just ignore them knowing that I'll end up embarassing myself and others (it's actually past embarassment, once you reach the most extreme form of depression, i'd describe it as an utter despair). When I was with someone, the distress of not witnessing feelings being reciprocated back and forth just heightened my depression, I didn't feel human, just an empty shell, the horrible thing is that I know what I should be feeling when I don't. I end up feeling sad and guilty for not showing that emotion when other expect me to, couple that with people not seeing my deficits and it's a horrible fake situation. I've always tried to go along with it, try to laugh when others are, put on a fake smile, don't show you're sad, etc. You're taken for a ride with people, there's an unwritten rule that you can't show you're sad, that would be a sign of weakness, but if it's genuine, why try to hide it?

[bikerlifestyle in reply to Hidden]

you are the first person that i have met that has the same lack of emotional memories, and thats the only way i can describe it, i dont know anyway of describing it any better

funny thing is i can remember the reg number of a car my dad had when i was a kid i am 45 now

[sospan in reply to bikerlifestyle]

Apologies just came across this post.

I find the same. It is as if when if had the bang on the head, something inside me fell out and went away. Feelings of emotion, motivation, drive etc. have gone me but have left a numb feeling I don't know what it is that has gone probably spiritualists will have a name for it but it is so strange

[Hidden]

Nick, My first marriage failed because of my TBI. I didn't have any mates either and the nearest I had to a computer was a slide rule and a copy of Castle's Tables.

Now I've remarried and I've been successful, mainly thanks to my wife's help - I didn't have the gumption really. I still have only a couple of mates.

It will come to you but in time. To meet you have to mix, something I still don't much like to do, but take your time, go out, meet people. Libraries and local Council meets are always worth a try and they cost bunce too. Never rush into close relationships, just let it happen.

Biker lifestyle: Dad's cars Opel Rekord ADN 494 [in Aden] and over here: Vauxhall Velox VVB578 and Vauxhall Cresta 8673VB.

My motor bike I was knocked off KKN330 and the car wot done the job: EDY409E.......what about that then?

[bikerlifestyle]

how weird, its only something i remembered after my accident it was OAC 154M i have no idea what car it was on my dad had a maxi and a big white woseley(no idea what model)

[kjg001]

I can only sympathise with you if you have no partner but encourage you to use friends and family to support you through your recovery. I feel lonely when my partner is at work but try to do things to keep myself busy. Are you going out and socialising ?

[nick_01]

yeah but dont have allot of friends and the friends i do have are older than me and in relationships

[Amicabilly]

At 56 i dont mind being left on the shelf but i wouldn't mind getting dusted a bit more often lol