why have all the congratulations dried up

[ncmurphy1951]

since my hemmoraghe in 2007 every milestone has been greeted by friends and family with amasment and congratulations 1st stand walk driving licence but am today feeling down as having lived a life before my injury in high level jobs hotels and casinois i have recently been adsked to advise on a multi million dollar development am i the only one congratulating myself where are all the friends now maybe see nthem again when the huse consultancy cheque arrives

[formula]

hi murphy again .. feel for ya mate , you certainly can count ya friends on one hand when something like a bad accident happens at first they all rally round .. then as time goes on they forget where ya live .. makes you view people in a different light ..

[ncmurphy1951 in reply to formula]

trhank you funny when you at top of game they all over you like a bad rash but now can't see them for dust and pathetic excuses still thewir loss

[ncmurphy1951]

funny all these so called friends all over me boasting to theri friends how their best mate raised £8000 for charity by hobbling but did they donate not a penny

[formula]

im with ya there murphy !! ive always said i miss what i cant do nomore but as a result in what happend to me i feel a much better person .. you priorities in life change over night and you notice a lot of shallow people in society i probably once was one of them, before one night changed my life ... human nature .. only think about things when it affects themselfs .. theres alot of self centerd and greedy people in this world ! some sail through life without a care in the world or step over people not thinking twice .. doesnt seem fair sometimes .. but we are both here and lets not let the BAST***DS get us down .. lol

[ncmurphy1951]

Calm language to what I usually use but thank you

Neil

[supertwizzle]

On the other hand you tend to find out who you can really rely on. I may have lost a lot of "friends" but have also met people who would do anything to help me. I still mourn for my old life sometimes but more and more I am finding the good in my new life including a new man who is the best thing to happen to me and cares for me so well ... It took my BI to help me see this so I guess you could say I'm grateful in some ways despite all the frustrations

[ncmurphy1951]

thank you from every cloud comes a ray of good keep looking and searching it is there unless you look how can you find

[brighton88]

lucky you, those around me were disapointed I lived, I think my brother had already planned how to spend my money if I had died

[ncmurphy1951]

funny that my siblings gave up on me last rites funeral planned even before my operation only my kids their mum my dad and fiancee knew i would pull through yet to speak to my siblings as for money i had none but tomorrow i will drive 119miles to visit my mums grave my siblings hate to hear about my various milestones i just laugh and carry on making them madder each time i do anything of consequence

[zainey-lainey]

yep deffo a common thing ....Friends who thort the old you was fun and worth noing oh and also for the profession you had coz then you could let them it on the cheap if not free... but as soon as you cannot give them anything they drift off. i think also they go because they dont no what to say or handle you also you the victim of such a traumatic time loose the ability to have a life so youv nout to talk about thats intresting so your topics of convo are hospital appointments, woop woop,oh and how you feel.etc which your buddies find boring so best just let them go coz they are never going to understand whatit is like coz its not somthing that happens often like a cold is a brain injury. IVE LEARNT "THE MORE YOU CAN DO THE LESS OTHERS DO AND PRAISE YOU FOR." youv got us now yey

[Hidden]

When I was 17 I had bags of friends but after I was knocked off my motorbike, suffered TBI and became something to avoid they all disappeared.

I don't have many friends now, 45 years on, at 62 but the ones I do have are all the more precious. They accept me for what I am.

Some of my friends have even had TBI's and they're a strange lot indeed :))

I don't drive and I have a very peculiar outlook on life, but those I mix with now know that and laugh with me and at me. I do the same with them. I don't dwell on the past, its losses or what might have been.

You can't make people like you and perhaps visiting say a local Headway forum might help? I used to visit a very successful First Tuesday Group, sadly now shut.