Fab Mum forever!

[Invisibleinc]

In September 1991 my then 56 year old Mum suffered multiple brain aneurisms whilst on holiday in California. She lived another 17 years almost as another person never recognising her family or friends again. She was an amazing person, clever, witty and unique. She had planned to write her version of the Great English Novel when she retired. She would have been 89 in October.

[cat3]

It must have been heartbreaking and shocking losing that precious connection with you mum.

I know my son and daughter feared I was lost to them following my haemorrhage. I insisted my daughter was a neighbour, addressing her by the neighbour's name, and barraged them with my endless delusions on daily visits.

Only after my return to reality did I learn how badly they'd been affected, but by then we could laugh about it.

So reading your words is a stark reminder how much worse it is for those like yourself whose relationship with their loved one is accidentally estranged ; such a cruel loss.

But you've chosen to continue celebrating your Mum's true self .....and it makes me smile.

Lovely tribute to your mum sharing her story here with us m'love ...

Cat, Xx

[Invisibleinc in reply to cat3]

Thank you Cat. I held out hope she would recover for a few years but eventually I had to grieve her passing which caused a rift in our family. The 'new' person wasn't my Mum.

[cat3 in reply to Invisibleinc]

I hope the mum you had for 56 years ; the mum you've grieved for ever since, is held safely in your heart and memory.

It's sad that your your family were at odds with your means of coping, but we deal with loss in whatever way feels right for us.

My kids & I talk often about my mum with great affection and humour since she died. I hope you're managing to keep focused on the best of times m'love...

Cat, x

[HungryHufflepuff]

thank you for telling us about your mum.

[Teazymaid]

Thank you for sharing what must have been a very difficult time for you all . We are all in this group as a result of a brain injury to ourselves , our family member or friend .. the information we read on here gives us so much more help , information and advice than any Dr can do .. would love to hear more about how your mum felt with her new life and if she was aware of it all being new and how you as her son managed to build a new relationship with her .. thank you again for sharing your loving words about you mum . Sue x

[Invisibleinc in reply to Teazymaid]

For two or three years I cared for my Mum hoping she would recover but she never recognised us again. I remember taking my daughter to see her as a toddler and my Mum just looked round her to see the TV. It meant nothing to her. She had no cogniscence of her granddaughter or any of us. It was so sad she never knew her grand daughter who is now 19 and at University. My father has seen her grow up. He is 87 in January.

[Notts22]

Thank you for writing about your momAt least you were able to spend some years with her after after the brain injury. She knew you were there for her.

Its not easy a brain injury, it changes you. My memory is not good and confidence is low

Take care make time for yourself now.

[Teazymaid]

oh bless you .. life is so cruel .. I am so sorry to hear your mum had no memories of any of you .. you just have no idea with brain injuries what the outcome will be .. I’m sure she felt your love even though she didn’t recognise you .. sue x