Weird and yet funny

[Newtonpovey]

What was a big problem for me at first was that after the accident I had no feeling and no use of my right hand so I tried practicing but that was really slow and I had to learn how to use my left hand to do everything that I normally did with the right. So please just sit for a moment and think about what you always do with your default hand. Okay ? So I had to learn to shave with the left and came down the stairs with tissue paper on a dozen cuts and looked like I’d had an argument with a porcupine. So shaving, stirring my coffee and eating soup all with the left and I laughed at myself because I had to use the left hand when going to the toilet and wiping my posterior with my left was just hysterically funny

[cat3]

Shaving with the none-dominant hand must be pretty damned awkward considering 'handedness' is an intrinsic characteristic formed in the womb. Sounds like you're referring to wet shaving ? ..........maybe time to go electric 🥴 although I'm sure that using your left hand for intricate movements can only help to train it, as back-up.

I had the toileting problem some years ago whilst in pain from a frozen shoulder and, I can tell you, I wasn't quite so good natured about it as you !

Well done Newton for finding humour in your own misfortune. Humour (often the dark type) has been a lifesaver for me (& my family) during bad times...... 😆 x

[AndrewT]

DearNewtonpovey,

Well Done Indeed, for 'Managing' with your Left Hand. I have friend, who had the Reverse Problem... she was Left Handed and had to learn, to use, her Right. I agree with cat3 though... get an Electric Razor! I am, to some extent 'Ambi-Dextrous' (I think that's the right spelling??) and tend to shave with Both hands. (electric razors Don't 'Cut You To Ribbons' either). Do you remember the scene, in 'Airplane', when theman puts on the After Shave...(AAAAARRRGGGGGHHHH... Mummy!)

Once again, well done, my friend.

AndrewT

[Newtonpovey in reply to AndrewT]

Thanks Andrew for an aaaaarrrrggjhh moment please read what I wrote in a reply to Liz.

Scary but made me laugh afterwards

[1949liz]

👋 Just to say well done 👍 and keep working on your left hand but please don’t forget to continue exercising on your right hand otherwise it just becomes a clenched fist. Having a exercise ball does help as you have to put pressure on your hand and arm to strengthen the muscle. Otherwise well done 👍 brilliant and positive Love Liz x🌹🙏

[Newtonpovey in reply to 1949liz]

Thanks Liz, at first I had problems because I used to hold things too hard or too loose so I dropped a few cups and broke 2 wine glasses as I held them way too tight. I’ve been practicing shaving and I’m getting there and not cutting my face too much. It was scary at first and I thought “don’t hold the grandkids too tight” and sometimes I’d be putting some logs on the fire and think “what’s that burning?” And it was just my hand so the docs told me off for using my right hand too much. It’s not so bad now and I haven’t broken too much but as I’m a guy it was weird going to the toilet and once I ended up hopping because I’d squeezed way too hard so there’s an aaaaargggjhh moment for you

[Newtonpovey in reply to 1949liz]

Yore great Liz and you’ve all got brilliant names here

[Pairofboots]

That brightened my Saturday, thanks. It reminded me of when my dog (he was humongous) nearly ran off with my arm, luckily gravity stopped him. This wasn't related to my BI, but it didn't help.

It wasn't my dominant hand, but it is surprising how much you rely on it. Slicing bread,. Having to hold the loaf still with my chin. Trying to separate the sheets of loo roll, and ending up looking like a mummy.

It was four weeks before the hospital realised that they had to surgically repair my arm, and eight weeks of it be immobilised.

The first thing in hospital was the amount of visitors I got, not from friends, but people that had read my notes, wanting to see the lunatic with a giant dog. The second thing was when the surgeon reviewed me, he asked me to move my fingers, I didn't even know if my arm was in the same room, let alone if I had fingers.

The amount of hassle I got in, I can only imagine your hindsighted amusement.

[sospan]

A week before my wife was going to give birth, I severed four fingers on my left hand. Took myself to hospital and they reattached them.

6 hours surgery I had a plaster cast over my hand except for the fingers that had metal pins sticking out, like metal skewers on a kebab . Left hand elevated up in the air on metal pole, right arm had the drip and monitors attached. I was put in a side room with the temperature cranked deliberatly high to aid the plastic surgery repair.

That was the end of the drama - or so I thought.

The hospital I went to, was where my wife worked as a nurse. If anybody knows the behind the scences of the NHS or watched numerous films from 60's onwards nurses have a wicked sense of humour and in the early 90's still behaved like graduates of St Trinians rather than of a nursing school, although having stayed overnight in a nursing school several times - it was an experience!

Just how many times you need to be asked if you need a bed bath by your wife's friends ?

Then it dawned on me, time for natures call and I could call for nurse but would it be a stranger arriving or one of my wife's friends ? Fortuneatly, the room had its own small and I mean small bathroom ? Anyway I managed it, me, two dodgy hands, a support stand, a drip stand.

If Twister was an olympic sport I would be holding a golden medal and looking forward to being in the Honours List.

Yep go to make the most of what you have while you have it.

[Newtonpovey in reply to sospan]

Sounds amazing really. I was just a hit embarrassed in the hospital because the nurse came into the shower to see if I was okay and it was a bit like carry on nursing cos he looked like Sid James. Your injury sounds bad and it’s great that you’ve kept on getting better. You can laugh at me when you think about shaving, going to the toilet and me trying to roll a cigarette. I should video it and people would fall over laughing

[Newtonpovey in reply to sospan]

Great name you’ve got as well

[Newtonpovey]

You are all really good thanks for replying and telling me what you all think. This place is way better than the usual social media places, it gives me the chance to have conversations with real people. Sometimes I say to people I know in the street “hi, how are you ?” And they just say fine or okay and then walk off. No one ever says fine thanks and how are you , they just walk off so they have monologues and they don’t converse. How unpolished is that ? Oh well I hope you are all happy and healthy 😁👍