Help for a newbie with relative just hospitalised

[pozza40]

Hello, I am new to this,in fact I have never posted on any forum before. I am just after some advice really. I don,t really know if I am coming or going at the moment. My husband was admitted to hospital just 4 weeks ago, he had a bit of a funny turn and wasn’t responding to me, he was diagnosed with a giant aneurysm which they had to operate on.he had 2 further surgeries to remove skull pieces to help reduce pressure. He was induced coma for 1 week, and was then taken off sedation. It’s been 3 weeks and although he is doing some hand squeezing and thumbs up to command he is not opening hie eyes yet.

I just would like to know what I should expect or am I expecting answers too soon.

Thanks for any help/advise you can offer

[Marnie22]

Hi. I am sorry to hear how difficult things have been.

I would recommend calling the Headway helpline on 0808 800 2244. They have the information that you need, but they are also very supportive and understanding. I couldn't even count how many times they have helped me.

I wish you all the best. 🙂🌸

[AndrewT]

Dear pozza40,

I'm very sorry, to hear, about your Husband- you clearly love him, very much.

Your Love, and patience- possibly in Spades- will be critical to his Recovery. I can't tell you 'How' he is going to be pozza40 and yes, it is, too early but I can Speculate.

Your Hubby is likely to be very Confused, probably very Outspoken. There could, very easily, be some 'Strong' (vulgar) language and/ or some 'inappropriate' behaviour- or 'intimate' behaviour in inappropriate places! There is likely to be considerable Anger/ Tantrums perhaps 'Appearing From Nowhere'.... over 'things' a trivial as getting a Tea- instead of Coffee. The 'Powerful' Anger will 'Disappear', as quickly as it appeared- your Hubby will be Loving you, Kissing your cheek and genuinely surprised by your tears..... Having COMPLETELY forgotten, what he said only Moments before.

Your Hubby may, very well, NOT be 'anything like' that.... but will become lost/ agitated away from home, will Hate ANY new routines / or Changes- of any sort. He may become 'Distant' like he is in a World Of His own, he may become Incontinent- or wet the bed.

Your Hubby might be ANY of these and, so many, more OR.... He might be your Loving Husband again, the man you Married, buy you chocolates (that's the Diet out the Window then) and flowers. I really can't 'say' but this is MY Prayer, for you both, pozza40.

Whatever the 'Outcome', your love (and patience- as I said above) will be key. I know that I speak for ALL, when I say, if we can help you further pozza40 then, please DO, contact us again. You will NEVER be considered a 'Nuisance' and no question is Too Trivial, for us to answer. Do call the Helpline, as Marnie22 suggested, and please,

Take Care Of Yourself. Sending you our Love, and best wishes

AndrewT

[cat3]

Such a scary time for you I'm sure Pozza. It's such a surreal situation to be thrust into and the uncertainty can be agonizing, especially as no one can fully predict the outcome of brain injury.

May I ask firstly whether your man's aneurism ruptured, causing a bleed on the brain ? Cat x

[pozza40]

Thank you for all the replies, I will try the helpline and cat3 his aneurysm did leak but then clotted and they could not save the artery flow, if I have understood that properly.I have been told he has had a massive stroke on the right side that means he will most likely not be able to move left side. me and the children do skype call with him but it is so distressing seeing him and not knowing whether he will wake up properly. he is 57 and was pretty active and healthy before this all happened.

[cat3 in reply to pozza40]

Thanks for the update Pozza. By seeking intervention before a full scale bleed your husband has averted much more serious damage and improved his chances of recovery.

I understand your concern over the hemiplegia issue and, although many stroke sufferers cope well after rehab, it's bound to be a worry for you & your family. But it's a waiting game as I'm sure you've heard, and I really do feel for you m'dear.

I was away in a world of my own after a hemorrhage in 2011 ; quite unaware of my son & daughter's shock and dreadful anxiety. It still pains me to think of their weeks of 'not knowing' and seeing that same sad situation here on Headway all too often.

Please stay with us Pozza so we can accompany you through this waiting period and beyond. It might be many more weeks before you see significant progress as your man's brain will be preoccupied with resting and recalibrating to compensate for damaged areas. Rest and the passage of time are his best friends just now.

Thinking of you, and all best wishes for promising signs soon ....... Cat x

[New_beginning]

Hello,

Please stay strong for your husband. My husband 41 sustained TBI of

Right Temporal Contusion, Subarachnoid Hemorrhage (SAH), Right Sided Transverse Venus Sinus Thrombosis, Small Subdural Haematoma and Left Petrous Temporal Fracture. ICP Monitor required (still healing) he is on his 11th week home and only just receiving home visits.

Please keep talking to your husband, sing to your husband. It is positive hes responding to touch on command. I took loads of photos in with details on the back for his nurses to talk about and show when his eyes opened when i wasnt there. It takes time, my husband had Post Traumatic Amnesia (PTA) minor traits still.

Your life will change now, you have to stay positive and strong infront of him, this is a scarey time for him too, and he may behave in ways you not seen before.

[GABMX]

Hi I’m so sorry to hear about your husband. I am also very new to this and have never posted before.

My boyfriend who is 39 suffered a massive intracerebral haemorrhage on the front right side of his Brian just 5 weeks ago and has had to have a craniotomy. He too was in an induced coma for 2 weeks. He was given a less than 50% chance of survival.

I can’t give you any answers to your questions as I’m just as confused and wondering what to expect as you are but I just wanted to offer you some support and send you some love and hope for your husbands recovery. I understand just how anxious you are feeling especially as with the current circumstances we can’t be there with our loved ones but I hope you find some comfort in that you are not going through this alone x