How do you stay motivated????
recently iv been trying to get my life together. I have set goals I need to reach but I find it very difficult to stay motivated. It's just so hard to stay like that and usually when I skip a tasks I'm meant to do I become very upset and annoyed at myself due to being de-motivated all the time!!!! Anyone else???
I can recognise this it even has a name adynamia and this symptom is one of many which receded over the years, so at 3 months you've got time for it to improve greatly.
I was unable to start on some things, in fact the more I tried to motivate myself the more I felt like I was shutting down, apparently this is common with a frontal lobe injury.
Whilst I've seen Neuropsychologists, at the time the symptoms had greatly reduced so I don't know if they could have helped with this. I'd certainly explore that option as this is one of the worst symptoms I experienced.
Been there for 12 years... Small Goals only in Bite sized chunks and any kind of reward after! And No punishing yourself either. I actually congratulate myself on even eventually putting recycling in dumpster a mile away. Paperwork is my Darkest HELL!
I was going to mention adynamia but sealiphone beat me to the draw, I call this anti-motivation, at the mo' I cant even get out the door and decisions are becoming almost impossible, (well sticking to them anyway) I've started sleeping in my clothes to save any hassle first thing. I used to give myself challenges with rewards as has been mentioned, but alas even this has slipped by the wayside, (the rewards mostly being something sweet which I now indulge without the challenge) feeling like one of those insects you see set in amber, its possible I'm going round- the- twist.
I can't see a reward working for this one. At the time I experienced this the most important thing in the world was (is) my daughter, age 7, yet I was unable to participate in the simple game of just passing a football to her.
Before my TBI we'd do this every night and I had no physical impediment but even my daughters "Do you not love me anymore" couldn't motivate me it's not about fatigue, tiredness or exhaustion is more like being frozen and being unable to move in the direction you want, I was able to 'just do' a lot of other things with her. I was also unable to do a whole range of other tasks, whilst having the energy and enthusiasm for others, it was very very strange.
Agreed seali, very verrry strange indeed, just want to lie down and listen to gregorian chant as am doing today, there seems to be no hope of it passing either, how long did yours last?
Really difficult to say but around 2-3 years, it slowly changed to feeling exhausted when trying to do certain things, which is seems to be classed as CFS rather than Adynamia.
During the 3 years so many symptoms were changing it's really difficult to pin point specific periods.
Hiya Marco, I had my head injury 24 years ago & I am still very unmotivated more often than not. Admitted I think a lot of that is due to the medication I take - lamotrogen, it's a mood stabilizer but being bi-polar it does save me having the dark depression, which is bringing tears to my eyes as I speak, so I am very glad of that.
A combination of both I'm sure. Likely to be the head injury more than the medication from what I've learned from this site over the last few years.
However after coming across this site a few years ago, after more than 20 years of thinking it was me just being lazy, even though I knew that wasn't the case, I learned to except my inability t do things due to my immense lack of motivation, caused by my head injury.
Now I just try to enjoy life the best I can, yeah I've got no money, I'm never likely to have money, I'm unlikely to ever achieve a great deal as I had intended before my accident, but on the other hand I don't push myself t failure every time.
Everybody is different, but as I'm sure you have noticed, there are a lot of similarities for the majority of people who have suffered a brain injury. Please don't beat yourself up about having no motivation, just learn to except the fact that U aren't the person u once were and enjoy life as the person U are now, to the best U can !!!
Stace
Nice seeing your name come up Stace ! x
Cheers Cat - I do keep an eye open & do respond when I think I can share 'my wisdom' ;o)
so how's life wi U ???
Doing ok thanks .........fresh out of hibernation & looking forward to some sun & more daylight. Keeping busy with chores/essentials/family etc., with loads of resting in between.....
Like you said, 'Don't do today what you can put off 'til tomorrow !' (or words to thet effect) 😏
You OK ? x
Hiya Cat, did I say that, are U sure, It must have been one of my extremely positive days that's for sure, but theoretically 100% true ;o)
So this ' loads of resting ' is that a few 20 minute naps or have u not tried that (even though I say it regularly ;o)
Who was it that used t take the mick out of me for going on about that - something doll, can't remember her real name either, but she used t come on all the time. Not sure if she does anymore. I have seen her once (I think ;o)
brokendoll rings a bell ???
& I'm well thanx - yes the hibernation period is over & now intending t have a couple of hours kip & a few 20 minute naps throughout the day. Make the summer seem longer. (8 hours sleep in Winter though ;o)
Yes, Broken Doll (Emma) is who you're remembering ; moved on a couple of years or so ago.........lovely girl.
You could promote the discipline of the 20 minute snooze ; call it 'The Stace Pace Routine'. ZZZ
My son's done it since he started work as there were (still are) never enough hours in the day for him. He sets his phone alert for 17 mins (don't ask ?) and afterwards is miraculously refreshed. I've tried but I'm too fidgety & cannot switch off.
Anyway, how good is this sunshine ? 😎☀ Hope you're making the best of it Stace ! See you later.......... xx
Sunshine ??? Hasn't arrived in Horley yet ;o( But it is bright grey cloud so it's obviously shining brightly above the cloud ;o)
Although I do swear by the 20minute nap, as I've mentioned before, sometimes I will have 20 more straight after & have been known t have a third 20 minutes.
If I get up t goto the loo or something (forced to get up) then I do wake up fully & never go back t sleep, but sometimes you're enjoying your nap so much, if there's nothing t get up for (which in our lives generally not ;o) , then why not.
You don't have to actually goto sleep though Cat & even 10 minutes will make a difference. I often close my eyes, totally relax & count to 100 and that makes a difference. Maybe try n do that 10 times over an hour if that's possible ???
people who have suffered a tbi or abi tend to suffer from lethargy, if you look at the definitions you come to laziness, cant be bothered, but its not actually our fault.
try doing it bit by bit, do a bit, then go away and do something else. ive got something like 5 or 6 different things on the go at one time.
all of my activities are indoors,i dont like going out, ive stopped going out with my wife now.
give my suggestions a go and see how you get on.
steve
I’m glad I caught this thread. My husband is 10 weeks post bi and can’t be bothered to shave or change his clothes which would have been unheard of pre-bi. I’m glad it’s got a name . I am guessing he has frontal lobe damage as he has executive functioning issues. He is now in neuro rehab and it’s a world away from acute.
Hi Marco I am 4 yes post bi and been struggling with this for over three years. I can still go for days without a change of clothes and an inability to do anything and no desire to leave the house. At other times I feel really well and think cracked it may be now I can write myself s rehab programme and stick to it. Thus would have been an easy task pre bi... But a can't write myself a rehab plan let alone stick to it, a daily day can be a struggle to feed myself or move. Before when I was in business I could have been on a computer for 8 hrs writing and checking programme and inputting data I have had to accept no more than half HR at a time for computer... This week has been a disaster thought I was progressing and signed up to be a market research gunie pig on computer and wondered why I was totally exhausted and unable to walk... That is what happens when my brain works too hard it stops my legs function ING ... So guninea pig out. No more computer back to tiny goals, I may try to have more than one project as someone said see if that helps. So glad I am not alone you can feel so isolated. Glad you joined the group they are a great help.
I think this is the most I've written I usually feel and understand and empathise with others then cannot put a response in to words... Probably be exhausted tomorrow lol
Hi Goldie. I'm sure you have heard this before but 3 months is a VERY short time when talking brain injury.
Just in case you haven't been told this you need rest.
The first 6 months are when any swelling/bleeding subside and natural healing occurs.
Have you spoken with the Headway helpline?
I don't set goals. I make lists. And do what I feel comfortable with. It is difficult to complete some tasks before the condition intervenes. I sit in a recliner, have a sandwich and a drink and wait for my energy to return.
I can manage between 3-6 hrs a day at full speed pottering. It seems that when jobs are finished properly I feel better😊
My wife keeps a close watch on me from a distance, I am very fortunate and grateful for her concern and watchfulness. We manage my condition together. 😄
How do I cope with rehab?
How can I help my family?
how do I cope with a loved one in a coma?
i just want to stay in bed today !
