Is this my new life?
Is this just fantasy?
Nowhere to hide,
Writing a new ditty.
Open my eyes,
Look up to the ceiling and see,
I'm just an ill man, I feel only apathy,
Because I've a queasy tum, wheezy blow,
Little sigh, little glow,
Anyway my wind blows doesn't really splatter the sheets, the sheets.
Mama, just grilled a ham,
Forgotten to buy any bread,
Mustard, go figure, the ketchup’s red.
Mama, life has just begun,
My brain had gone and blown it all away.
Didn't mean to forget I’d died
If my mind’s not back this time tomorrow,
Carry on, carry on as if my skull was never battered.
Do wait, my drugs have come,
Sent shivers down my spine,
My head is aching all the time.
Could cry, everybody, Nurofen I’ll give a go,
Gotta leave the pain behind, or I’ll hit the roof.
Mama, whooo? (bloody hell, my wind blows),
Anusol I wanna buy,
I sometimes wish I'd never had piles at all.
I’ll go into Netto if I can,
With a whoosh, with a whoosh, just how well will the cream go?
I’m such a dolt, it’s frightening,
It’s very enlightening, for me.
(Simon Mayo) Simon Mayo.
(Simon Mayo) Simon Mayo,
Simon Mayo Hercule Poirot
I'm just a ill man, somebody loves me.
He's just an ill man from a normal family,
Spare him from the NHS pomposity.
Little sigh, little blow, what the hell do I know?
Sleep killer! No, we will not let you go. (On a go slow!)
Sleep killer! We will not let you go. (Life has no flow!)
Sleep killer! We will not let you go. (Feel very low!)
Will not let you go. (Broken toe!)
Never, never let you go
Never let me go, oh.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Oh, pizzeria, Brighton Pier (aching ear, just bloody go.)
The local pub no longer has a devil put aside for me, for me, for me.
So you think you can moan about me and say goodbye?
So you think you can shove me and hang me out to dry?
Oh, maybe, can't do this to me, maybe,
Just developed gout, just gotta shout out of pure fear.
(Oh, yeah, oh yeah)
Only getting fatter,
Anyone can see,
Nobody really chatters,
Only writing crap matters to me.
Anyway, my wind still blows.