Hi all, I'm new here. My names Rebecca, im 21 and from Lancashire.
I've been struggling for quite a while now and was hoping I could get some advice from other people in a similar situation.
Two years ago my mum suffered a heart attack and from that, an anoxic brain injury. I'm sure most of you have all been through something similar, so I can skip out the ICU, the scans, the daily hospital visits, the ups and downs and just skip to present day.
My mum made a fantastic recovery. It took a while, but physically, apart from a few minor things such as dyspraxia ect she is amazing. And to look at her you wouldn't know the difference, which is amazing given the outcome we had been told to expect. The only thing is she's not my mum any more. I am living with a stranger.
I used to be so close to my mum. We were best friends, we'd cuddle on the sofa eating snacks having a gossip and a laugh and go shopping and go to our horse together but now she hates me. I'm talking the "I don't want anything to do with you" "Don't even bother with Mothers Days" kind of hatrid that I get thrown at me every day. My whole family has noticed the change in her and her relationship with them all has changed but more so me. She doesn't speak to me at all. She ignores me nd we live together in silence. These last 6 months have gotten so bad, i've had to move my horse to a different yard to get away from her.
I don't know who this person is. I don't like this person, I don't love this person. I miss my mum so much it hurts, but know she will never come back. How do I grieve for her when i'm still reminded of her every day?
How do I accept all of this?