All on my own, but I don't mind! - Fibromyalgia Acti...

Fibromyalgia Action UK

49,450 members60,658 posts

All on my own, but I don't mind!


Most evenings I am on my own for much of the time, hub and daughter work odd hours so sometimes I am on my own all day till eight thirty and sometimes they are here most of day but out in the evenings.

I say on my own and not alone because I quite like my own company!!!! Do you?

I can please myself when it comes to TV or PC, reading or having a bath with lovely candles and no one knocking on the bathroom door saying they need an urgent wee!!!

I am sitting here in fingerless mittens because my hands have been feeling particularly cold and achey today, Stupidly ate meat pie (home made) for tea and now have indigestion so I will hit the bottle (of gaviscon) or maybe have a low fat live yogurt.

Good news from maxo facilary dept at hosp yesterday is that I do not have Sjogrens, just lichen planus which makee my mouth sore but is not serious. The doc there ws lovely and actually understood about fibro and talked to me like I was an intelligent human being.

Still need to get referred to a specialist in genito urinary probs for bladder pain and pain in my delicates.Does anyone else get intense bladder pain from a full bladder on waking and have to sprint for the loo? This was not an easy thing to do when camping half way up a mountainside in tuscany last year!!!

Right thigh feels like it has been kicked by a donkey and hip is sore and stiff, I think these are quite common with us lot. Walking around town not too bad but standing at check out when it all siezes up is almost unbearable. I have though discovered that taking just one tramadol just as I am going to bed seems to help me not to wake up feeling like a pummelled piece of plasticine.

Gonna get my yogurt and a cuppa and settle down in front of a film now. Have a good night all of you.


12 Replies

Hi Spidey,

I live alone, and I love it! I'm never lonely because my family live nearby, and I'm lucky to be able to get around fairly well, so I can usually go and meet friends for a coffee and a chat.

Like you. I need a dose of Tramadol at night, but it wears off, so I'm usually awake and creaking and groaning by 5am. I have to get up and have hot tea, hot shower and another dose to feel human again. Then I go back to bed and oversleep! :)

The 'morning bladder' is a nuisance - I find I'm OK if I keep well- watered. when people have bladder trouble, they usually cut down their fluid intake, but it's not a good thing to do!

Sorry your having a few medical probs at the moment, at least your doctor sounds sympathetic.

Take care and chin up!

Love from Moffy x


I don't work so I have the days to myself and I can always occupy my time until the family arrive home and yes I like my own company

VG x

It's good that you don't feel alone, Spidey. Hope you get your bladder problems don't drag on and are diagnosed soon. I've been under the care of the local specialist nurse for several months. She has pinpointed caffeine as the major culprit for my urgency issues, but over 6 months of pelvic floor exercises and less caffeine have still not yielded the results I need. Fingers crossed you get sorted!

I don't do well living on my own. I had years of it and ended up in a bad way. I married for the wrong reasons and after 20 years, still ended up lonely. There was a lot of negativity in the marriage, so we divorced and I relocated.

Now, apart from when he has to visit family for high days and holidays, my wonderful new partner and I are together 24/7 because neither of us works. Money's tight, but we love being together all the time! We crave it, in fact lol. Sadly, he's away currently for the week but 2 of my wonderful neighbours are trying to help me get through yet another public holiday without the love of my life grrrr.

To add insult to injury, my knee blew out last night and today has been even more painful than usual. It took me hours to get downstairs to feed the cats and grab a much-needed coffee :-/ and I missed the opportunity to go to a local garden centre with my neighbour :-( Instead, she's coming round for coffee tomorrow. It will be great so long as I don't have to "dash" (i.e. crawl) up the stairs for a pee!!

Lol you will have to keep a 'she wee' downstairs!!!!

When I became single and moved in to my nice little flat with my daughter I enjoyed being on my own, this was 8 years ago. Even when I was 8 years ago. Then I was diagnosed with fibro 3 years ago and it all changed and now my daughter has left home I wish I had someone to talk things over with, help me when I can't even get out of bed or just give me a cuddle when feeling teary. All of you with an oh are so lucky. I think I am having a bit of a down day today so forgive me, its just yhat you my fibro friends are the ones I turn to for a chat, a moan or even a virtual gentle cuddle xx


I'm alone most of the time too. Hubby's hours means he's gone before I get up. Very often not home till 10.30 pm then he falls asleep in the chair. I have people I can visit. My daughter lives fairly close. I see her most days. But it's on my terms really. I take her to work and look after her baby. I don't mind either. I've got from bein a very sociable person to a bit of a recluse with this illness. I see friends one at a time when I have the energy. I don't really feel lonely....but then I have faith so spiritually I'm nt alone. There's plenty of company out there when I can handle it. I tend to find people demanding now. I suppose I am now just a quirky weird woman lol but I'm ok with that too. It is how it is ......

Awhhh Chrissy - don't fret chuck!

Whenever I feel the lack of an OH, I just think about all the sweating, pharting and snoring that I no longer have to endure, not to mention the heaps of laundry and general clearing up that men require!

I know I shouldn't generalise, and that some men (and women!) are helpful and wonderful to live with, but from my long experience of life, I have decided that on the whole, relationships suck!

Don't think 'ideal' think 'real', and remember there are always opportunities for friendship and company, even romance, no matter how disabled you are.

So many people are in bad relationships, and that's worse than none, believe me!

I'm glad you feel supported by us here. Never be afraid to bring your troubles to us, and usually someone will come up with an answer. You may be alone, but you need never be lonely!

Love from Moffy x

Hugs Chrissy, that was me too yesterday :-(

Spidey, great idea!!!

This morning hub got me porridge and tea in bed, Then the dog jumped on the bed and I spilt the tea so we had to strip the bed!!!! He has gone of oto work now. He has counsellinig clients on a sat so he is in and out as the rooms are just up the road. Daughter is still in bed enjoying a day off from Pizza Hut where she works. (sometimes she brings home a pizza)

I have washing on and have tidied up a bit. Supposed to be going out to buy a birthday pressie for someone. Will see how I feel after a bath. Saturdays are quite noce, a mox of being on my own for a while and hub popping in and out. He usually calls me about one and says can I have a sandwich ready as he has an hour before next client.

My daughter's friends sometimes drop in for a cup of tea with me. I have known many of them since they were at primary school and have become a bit of a mentor to many of them. If i get tired I can tell them and they dont outstay their welcome. They all know where the teabags are and make me the tea.

It's funny but I still feel that weekends are different even though I don't work.


Sounds lovely x


Whilst I wouldn't want to be on my own all the time, I do like my own space. I wish my hubby would go out more, as we don't share the same interests. He likes all these detective programmes which bore me. He was a policeman for 30 years so I guess it still interests him. I like to listen to radio or cd's. It will get better when the weather improves as he loves fishing.We are funny creatures sometimes aren't we?

I had bladder problems, couldn't hold it and was up several times a night. I had a sling fitted which has been my saving grace but doesn't work for everyone. It can cause overactive bladder which is as bad as the leaking I was experiencing. I hope you get yours sorted, it really lowers your morale. x

My son lives with me; supposedly my carer, but he is mainly asleep when I'm awake! I have continence problems nowadays, fortunately have loos on both floors.

I used to love being alone, nobody to please but myself; but it's no longer possible to go for long solitary walks in the countryside, or any of the other things I liked to do. I'm almost housebound now, only get out to the hospital (hospital Transport). Beginning to think I should set up a tent in Outpatients! Lol!

Cheers, Midori

You may also like...