Fibromyalgia Action UK
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I've been struggling with my relationship for a few months now, one min I adore him, the next just want too run away, how do I know if it's real, I love him, can't help feeling its Fibro related he's hard working , good dad, I'm even picking fault with his dad duties!!!! The more grumpy I get the worse it is, it just seems one big vicious circle for me , why can't my mood just be stable, it's never been this unstable, it's got to be Fibro related, wanted to post this for a while just didn't want my husband to be made too feel like he was bad

Hope all well as can be expected

Regards Nicki xxxx

4 Replies

I have terrible mood swings, my partner bless him knows when to leave me alone he see's the signs and just goes into another room. This makes me realise that I am being a moody cow (hence my name Bacaloca means mad cow in spanish) it doesn't stop me but it makes me think and I try to stop, He knows I can't help it and he say's he loves me for who I am not what I am, I think I need a bucket now I feel a bit sick...


I. Love my OH to bits ... I am pretty certain he feels the same ... When I know I have been moaning a lot about my fibro I ask him how he puts up with me and he says if I know you are going to moan about fibro I know there's nothing I can really do so I just tune you out i,m not offended cos I get the rant off my chest and he hasn't really heard so he's not being pulled down by my moan.... I must add on the times I have had other things wrong with me like appendicitis he was wonderful and got me an ambulance bag packed etc. There are times I do feel irritated when fibro is bad and nothing anyone does is right so I think it may be fibro bringing you down and making you doubt things

Hope things get better

Hugs VG x


Hello Nicki, I think we can all relate to your message and what you say. I can for sure! We all change a bit with Fibro, some days we are bound to be less tolerant especially when we are in a lot of pain. Our fuses may be a bit shorter sometimes. It's very hard for our partners, spouses etc., they probably don't know whether they are coming or going half of the time depending on whether it's a good day for us or a bad day.

I couldn't love my hubby any more than I do, but sometimes I snap at him when I'm in terrible pain and I've had enough, I always always apologise though because I love him and I don't want him to think it's anything he's done. He would do anything for me and does whatever he can to make my life easier and more comfy. I couldn't bear to deliberately upset him. He is always there for me to rant, scream, cry etc and he knows I am always there for him too which is the most important thing.

When our Fibro is really bad no-one can do anything right around us, this is normal. Don't be too hard on yourself Nicki, if you love your OH as much as you say you do tell him, let him know that you do and that it's just your Fibro messing with your head and making you snappy sometimes if that's how it affects you. By reassuring our OH's it will make it easier for them to understand how we feel and in turn make it easier for them to deal with too.

How about having a big sit down chat and thrashing it all out on the table. We always do that if we think it's time we had a talk about everything. That way no-one has to worry about anything as you've talking it all through. Talk about your insecurities, the things that worry you, how you feel. Above all, be honest. :)

Hope it all works out for you Nicki. Bless you. (((hug))) xxx


Hi honey, i'm lucky to have a man who loves me unconditionly and helps and supports me. I do find it hard and can be difficult to live with but like Liberty we always chat things through and constantly communicate, How ever if something were to happen between us and we were no longer together ( : ( scary thought )i would not enter into another relationship readily as i feel i do burden my man and it has taken a lot for us to get to where we are now, it has been a roller coaster to get here. I do worry that i will get so bad that he will become a care rather than my lover and that scares me and thats when i start to push him away and resent him, maybe that's where your conflicting feelings come from?

Take care honey xxx


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