wondering what the point is

the last three days i've done nothing but wonder what the point of being here is really all about

we are meant to be put on this earth to live , but do we really live with these illness (ME/CFS ,Fibro,depression) because to me this is not living it's just existing .

i always thought at the age of 38 i'd be living life to the full (my daughter leavng home ) i'd be doing all the things i'd never got to do when i was younger because i was busy being a single mum who worked her buttom off and for what ?

i'm now to ill to do anything , can't travel which was something i'd thought i'd be doing , no man in my life , no job , friends that don't bother , daughter that can't be bothered , stuck in 24/7 and loneliness .

this week has just been crap and as left me feeling so very very low and very frustrated.

on top of all the stress and pain i'm already under i've had the cyst on my shoulder (under the skin ) come up from an infection which i'm on meds for and have to wait to have removed , the nerve in my back has been in spasm so been playing my legs up , i've got my ESA appeal in two weeks time which i'm deading (and have to go alone because no one can be assed to go with me )i've had treament twice this week which was the biggest waste of time .

i just can't stop crying where i'm so feed and up frustrated of this so called life

5 Replies

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  • Tracy please don't be so depressed I know it seems all black and depressing at the moment, but it does ease slighly as time goes on, I know it is easy for me to say that but believe me I have been there and am still suffering but as I look at the photos of my two grandchildren it brightens me up. You can always come on here and you will find friends to talk to and listen to you. I hope all goes well with your appeal and keep your chin up. Violet

  • your post sounds the same as one i posted yesterday!! i totally empathise with you, but unfortunatly, i havent found a solution yet xx

  • i feel pretty much the same,i have 5 kids 2 of them being 4 months and 3 next week,i think sometimes if i didnt have to be here for them i'd end it.feels as if i deal with this pain for everyone else's benifit,which i think personally we fibro sufferers all do.take care now n chin up.xxx

  • Hi, firstly you dont have to go to your appeal on your own the CAB or a soliciter can go in with you so please contacy them.

    Also you may be entitled to some care fro adult social services who may be able to arrange for a care to assist you to go out even if its only for a cuppa

    try looking for a local support group and any local WI or something similar even a local church you dont have to be religous to go along

    i know how you feel i am struggling myself as you but there is always a way to gain support from around you and sometimes non family members are more helpful

    hugs poppy xx

  • Hi firstly poppy03 is so right you dont have to go in alone and also the people who work there will come in if you want them too

    please dont write things like wish you were not here i know a girl who died last year of cancer she had it for 2 years she had a partner who works offshore and 2 kids aged 4 and 2 and they got married 3 months before she died she was 26 years old her kids have now got no mum and her husband has had to leave his good job to look after the kids they were a lovely couple

    so please dont say things like that when that young girl had no choice she was taken from this earth and her family

    i know it is depressing but try to think of what you can do rather than what you cant

    try to join a club or go to soe activity where you live one lady on here does circuit training every week she doesnt do it she said how your meabt to but she goes and has fun

    so please also go to see your GP and tell them how you are feeling anfd dont forget we have each other on here

    love to you diddle x

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