Upset

[Lockerbielass]

I knew my post about negativity would raise questions...but to be told by lots of people 'why are you here then?' Is upsetting....I thought we were all allowed to say how we saw things and blog about them. Obvioulsy not....only the clique can.

[Hidden]

I never knew there was a clique, and I for one never took offence at your post , we re all entitled to an opinion,

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

tooo true love diddle x

[fibrodude]

I have no problem with your post....and I refuse to be part of a clique! Keep posting...nothing wrong with raising questions...we may not always get favourable answers but hey thats ok too. What would we do without questions and debates...

[Hidden in reply to fibrodude]

here here love diddle x

[Hidden]

oh dear no one should have said why ar eyou here then it was your blog and your opinion and were entitled to say that if thats how you felt you are welcome to write what you want within reason obviously we all have to be careful what we wrie i commented on your blog yesterday .

ithe thing is if people are in pain they want to come on here and say perhaps because who they live with are not supportive and they arent comfortable saying it to them and also they feel better by off loading it on here as we all do me included

sorry if you felt there is a click on here as there is nt but somepeoplee get upset and different things none of us would intentionally upset each other you included but also when people are having a painful day and also other things goging on in their private live sthat they may not want to divulg eit can be quite easy for people to get upset

i am very snappy sometimes to my partner as i am in pain but you would not realise it on here

i hope that you keep coming on here and your opinion and view on things is as valid as anyone elses well that is my opinion any way take care love diddle x

[Hidden]

VERY SORRY, I will admit to being one of the people who asked why you were using the forum and I apologise for that. I was in a lot of pain that day and shouldn't have said it. You have every right to voice your very relevant question so please don't even consider not coming here any more. I also belong to a support group which is very large and has written into it's 'mission statement' that every voice has the right to be heard and I am a big supporter of this so again, I really should have known better.

My response should have been that although many people do complain about the negative things, these people (like me) have nobody else to speak to about my FM. I know it makes a big difference because I was diagnosed with breast cancer in January but have a lot of support from the breast care nurse, my GP and one lovly lady on here who has been through it and is happy to provide me with support. I now only mention my cancer when it is good news (which it has been recently thank god), I have also posted on the forum about the very different response I get from medics, relatives, friends and the general public towards the cancer and the FM.

Yes, there are a lot of people having a moan but I find that reassuring because I read the responses to their moans and I get support for my own moans whether I have posted about them or not. There are also very positive posts. I myself posted that it wasn't always a downwards spiral because I had gone into remission and managed to go back to work for over ten years.

Also there are some people who I've gotten to know a bit better and we communicate by normal email a lot. Believe me, I am well know for being an 'outsider' so this is really good for me and shows how desperate I am.

Other than that I get a laugh quite a lot when people post funny things that have happened not always about fibro.

I don't find this forum cliqey at all but I have left the Macmillan forum because I found this cliquey and felt as a newcomer I wasn't welcome. Plus most post were about people who had horror stories (true stories though) that I would rather not know about unless I have to. I'm certainly not a member of any clique. I'm probably better known as that woman who writes really long answers!

Please feel free to PM me if you want to talk about this more.

Christine x

I also

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

aw thay was really nice and exactly why i like being on here love to you long blog woman lol love diddle x

[rosehip]

I DONT SEE IT AS A CLICK AND I AM A NEWBIE .X

[Hidden in reply to rosehip]

thats good love to you diddle x

[fairycazzie in reply to rosehip]

Me toopretty much and love it!! Xxx

[trisha64]

i think its quite insulting to say there is a my gang thing in here ,,, we all post good and bad days ,being able to talk freely about how bad i feel helps ,, i cant tell my family as they worry so here i can vent ......

all the people on here know exactly how the other feels and thats why its such a good place ,, if im really low i tend to avoid posts i know will get me down

[julie51]

Lockerbielass-everyone is entitled to have an opinion and i think you are right, sometimes positive thought is a good thing, personally i have to as i have to work full time, so i haven't really got time to be negative even when i'm in pain and haven't had much sleep x

[julie51]

Thanks Christine, positive thinking goes a long way and sometimes it is a struggle as you know (lots of praise to you dealing with youre heart bypass AND fibro-must be hard), i think trying to help yourself through healthy eating and some sort of exercise (needn't be strenuous) helps a lot-love julie51 x

[trisha64]

i do chris if i feel okay i will try and be supportive but if im feeling rubbish i know im no good at that so i steer clear until i feel better again .. there are some lovley people on here and you have all got me through a really dark patch and i will always be grateful for that xxx

[susie59]

i am very new here too, but think its very friendly and havent noticed it being cliquey, i remember your blog and answered it, i hope your ok, i thought it was alright, much love and hugs.xx

[fairycazzie]

That is well said lol.

I have a house full my eldest son just left home at 23 and still trying to come to turns with it all..long story. I have other issues and so think allll the stress provokes our illness too i have a fair bit going on and dont know what to do or which path totake am struggling big time . This site helPs me soooo much as kinda takes mind away from other things.. My only wish like any of us is to wake up from this nightmare and alll be gone xxxxxxx

[Ang01]

Hi Lockerbielass, please dont stop posting on here. If you are afraid to post anything you think may be negative and feel wary of doing it I wouldn't mind if you PM me, I'm sure there are others that wouldn't mind either. Its not about having all good days cos thats just unrealistic, we all have our ups and downs and some of us have a wider circle of people to vent these feelings on than others. If I feel like this I tend to isolate myself whereas other people feel the need to talk or even shout about them.

I hope you feel reassured by the replies you have received and are feeling better about it all. Take care, Love Angela xx

[julie51]

enjoy, you deserve it :~) xx

[Hidden]

Hey I also commented on the blog, however I like a healthy debate / discussion and in no way intended to be personal, just giving my view, and no way suggested you should not be on here.

The world is full of people with different views and outlooks. We are not always going to agree, but that's life. Life would be boring if we were all clones of each other. Keep posting, debating is healthy.

I do have people who I converse with more than others, but guess that will happen, as it does in life. But I am happy to talk to everyone, on all types of subjects.

All the best

Lou x

[kathlaidlaw]

don't you stop if there is one i have not come across it and if there is then post moor often and piss them of

sofft hugs from me to you kath

[kathlaidlaw]

and if you feel people will get upset then just inbox me

so you go girl kath

[Hidden]

apologies for not reading all these posts, i haven't the energy today…. I never saw your original post but would like to just add… i'm a newbies, haven't made many posts and apologies for not even introducing myself properly…but i would like to add that where I have posted or those who I have PMd have been so helpful I already feel like part of the 'family'….and thats how it feels…. The problem with electronic messaging wether it be on forums, texts or otherwise, is that you can't feel the emotion behind the comment and I am sure that no one meant to upset you.

I belong to a craft forum and lately I haven't felt like posting much on there because I feel so negative inside, but as we are all friends on there too.. most would be understanding, but I can say that it would make me feel upset if anything I said was taken the wrong way.

One thing when you are in pain is that stress makes pain feel worse….we dont need that extra stress, so its something we should all think about before we post, is think…'would we like that said to us'??

Hope you dont think me stinking my nose in as i didnt see the original post, but we should all be grateful we have these forums and be able to support one another and use them for that…. I hate seeing anyone upset

sending you hugs and hope today will be a better one for all xxx ((((((hug)))))

(sorry for going on!! rozzy xxx)

[Hidden]

I do hope she comes back to read all these very supportive comments!

[SuzySparkle]

Hi Lockerbie_lass - I commented on your post only to say that there is a balance to be found for us all. Keep blogging - if we were all the same and thought the same the world would be very boring!

[retiredpharm]

I can understand what you mean and did answer your original comment. As anold man ( password grumpy old git, on a lot of sites) I am not really on the same wavelength as most of the ladies. But that doesn't stop me feeling for the folks who need to blog about their distress. this site is an outlet so go for it, get it out of your system.

I have numerous other problems beside the fibro and reading the blogs here has made me realise everyone has other issues besides fibro..

It is good to be able to add light-hearted comments although at the moment I am not in the frame of mind to do that myself - I heard yesterday that my sisters son deliberately walked in front of a train, for no obvious reason.

[dag338]

Thinking of you at this sad time xx