lack of sympathy ?

I used to be a very sympathetic person, and very understanding.

Last while ive noticed i have no compassion at all for peoples minor ailments, ppl on my facebook page moaning about the latest cold etc, i want to scream, say look your illness has a beginning, short middle and an end, mines doe not!

Thats gets me down as i feel fibro has even begun to rob me of the person i was in that respect , anyone else feel this way ??

17 Replies

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  • I hadn't realised it but yes i do....I'm especially fed up with the whingers who have got themselves into a mess through their own actions!

  • I can sometimes be like that but I try to appreciate that its all relative....

  • It depends on how i feel and what day i am having, but usually i get hacked off with certain people who moan at the slightest thing all the time. kel xxx

  • every ones problem is real to them !

    that is how i try to cope ...

  • Thanks all makes me feel better im not alone in that, dont get me wrong im a nurs ein elderly and have alot of time for them, and my friend who had alot of problems, but things like the cold and oh im ill i had a sore tummy last night just irritates me, before i fell ill i didnt moan aboutt he small things considering the people ive nursed with cancer etc, but small things just hack me off lol

    xx

  • Sadly I too have lost much compassion, especially for my family when they pull a muscle and I think the way you described. Trying so hard to be more caring like I used to be. It does depend on my mood though xx

  • thanks Christine, feels really nice to speak to people who know what its like living with this condition, invisible illness always gets the "but you look so well " attitude, just speaking to others who know that the reality is far different helps x

  • it is hard to have any compassion left when you have to face the medical world whom by far are not always understanding. comments from friends and family have really hurt me and made me feel so angry at times. i had always been the one to put other first. sadly i have had to change this. i am left isolated and so sick of digs from so called family and friends, its impossible to retain your objectivity when in great pain. i think of this condition like chinese torture for you never know what is going to hurt most next, from hour to hour.

    if a trained solider had to endure such torture i bet after time they would break.

    you can be happy all the time and certainly not when in pain and certainly not when snide comments are made behind your back to your loved ones.

    this conditions so needs urgent awareness campaign in media and doctors surgeries.

    we can live in hope xxx

  • Yes I do feel like that but to them people a cold is the end of the world and others who are really ill and i mean terminal prob look at us and think i wsh??? but it does not stop how you feel i am not the person i was and if i try to be i know all about a few hours later but we have got to thank our lucky stars for what we have its not always easy but we must try you take care and getting it out on here helps love to you diddle xx

  • Diddle i agree and ty

    happe it cetainly does need to be spoken about and awareness raised! x

  • I have times when all i am is f/m . All my thoughts and actions are me,me,me and the pain but there seems to be no escape at the moment .

  • Ive turned into a right bitch I was always doing everything for everyone, compassion personified, now Im a bad tempered cow, Im in constant pain,so how do you cope with that, I was always the chearful one, I cant remembered the last time I laughed

  • I know how you feel - over the years and even now I still do a lot for people and in the last week have been let down majorly twice. On facebook I always support people that I can see needing a boost, but in the last couple of weeks when I have been really sick, only two people bothered to post support. One of my schoolmates actually pretended not to see me yesterday when I had supported her through problems with her children.. When I need a bit of tlc I don't get it.. hence I am seriously thinking of coming off Facebook.

    I still do what I can to help others.. I make lunch once a week for a 79 year old lady and walk her dog when I can, but I know she appreciates it. I do more for animals now... telling eh? My partner gets fed up with me sometimes, but he has no idea what it feels like to have flu 24/7.....

    But I'm glad I can come on here on have a moan to people who understand how I feel! Gentle hugs to everyone and sorry for moaning on x

  • to be honest i find facebook is more of a stress than a good place to meet xxx

  • MissKitty

    for me the point of coming here is to share with people who totally understand the difficulites we all face dail. I know exactly what you saying, i supported a friend with endometriosis, through her hysterectomey, we were both at time lone parents, after her op i got her bread and milk, and did her dhishe sin sink, offered to walk her kids back from school,all the while i had some symptoms i could expalin, felt like i was low on energy , once fibro fullu knocked me down, and i found at time walking even difficlut, she couldnt accept i was no longer the supporter, i was needing as you say the TLC, lost a few friends along the way last thre years, found that some of my friends as gems, but like you animals have been a source of comfort for me, i got into cat rescue once i managed my symptoms better, and have adopted a few stray cats with behavioral problems, who ive put time and effort into bringing round, and been repaid 50 fold.

    Big squeezy hug back at ya honey, and remember to that lady at 79 what you do means the world to her im sure x

  • definatly yes, i have a friend and i use that term loosley who complains day and night about her life ,, she goes out three times a week , has a great job ,, fab boyfriend ,, and i look an think sod off !!!!!! my partner and i split as he couldnt deal with the "new me " , i couldnt continue with my job ,, and just thinking about a night out exhausts me ,,

  • I enjoy Facebook too much to come away from it but I have definitely lost friends along the way with this blasted condition. Am a social animal but find myself in a corner now and pretty much MrsBillyNoMates. Was it because I moaned too much? Was it because everyone became bored with me not getting better? I've tried to be compassionate with friends, personal and virtual, over the years and it seems to have counted for naught in the end. These days I ignore the temporary "woe is me" comments but keep an eye in case anything worse develops.

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