Today I am suffering badly with trapped wind( TMI, I hear you cry!!) in fact Richard Branson has telephoned me twice wanting me to fire up two of his hot air balloons when I' m ready!!
I thought I would look on the Internet for help, I did haven't good laugh at one option, yoga , lay on the bed and raise your knee up gradually to you forehead, good god I am so physically knackered trying to bend my legs is a challenge,,!!
In fact thinking about it when I was fit and healthy I don't think I could' ve done that!!!
Oh sod it , I think I shall just take a teaspoon of bicarbonate of soda in a small amount of water, I am just about physically able to do that!
I am then going to lay out on a lounger outside, if you watch then News tonight and see a hot air balloon in the shape of a woman in a black top and blue skirt floating around as a ufo will one of you nice folks phone the news station in York and explain it is me!! Thanks!!