2 week wait finally over - BFN

Test day and before I even looked at it I knew it was neg - I had just that very second started to bleed. I just don't know why my body doesn't work. On my first ICSI cycle it almost felt as if I'd miscarried (daft eh?) but this time I don't feel anything ( yet), maybe anger and frustration. Since starting our treatment in December, I have done everything I can think of - losing weight, regular exercise, cutting out caffeine and alcohol, reflexology, acupuncture, pre-conception supplements, sperm friendly lubricant, charting and timing sex accordingly then keeping bum raised Even stuck to unscented deodorant and soap. And nothing has worked. Don't know what else to try. I even booked 2 weeks off work (unpaid) so I wouldn't be lifting. It's going to be a long time before we have the money for another go. My DH thinks I might be getting too stressed over it - but I'm 39 now and time is running out. Tried cheering myself up with Jaffa cakes - didn't work. Anyway, good luck to everybody on the 2 ww!

2 Replies

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  • So sorry to hear that this cycle of treatment has not been successful. It’s such a nightmare time going through the 2ww, but you certainly did everything possible to hang on to your little embryo(s). It’s difficult to know what to say at such a time, but why don’t you treat yourself to a relaxation CD, if you haven’t already got one? It just might help a little while you are feeling so angry – which is quite understandable. Try and get into the habit of perhaps listening to it for half an hour a day, maybe before bedtime, so that you will hopefully feel brighter the next morning. Keep up with the exercise and healthy food too, so that you are in good shape. Talk with your DH, as he will be feeling your upset too, and see if you can confide in a close friend for support. Meanwhile, I do hope that you soon feel more comfortable with what has happened – and more Jaffa cakes??

    Diane Arnold

  • Sorry to hear your news, Diane is right you did everything possible, sometimes it is down to fate. Have you considered hypnosis to help you relax and stay positive?

    Try not to blame yourself, I used to do that all the time and in then end it just stresses you more, which is what you dont need. Good luck.

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