reciprocal ivf

[lilleyofthevalley]

Hi, I was just wondering what people's thoughts are on how I'm feeling : I started looking into reciprocal IVF for me and my wife 5 years ago, we had 2 failed rounds with my eggs and on our 3rd nhs round the consultant suggested we try with my wives eggs, and her carry as it takes a lot of time out of the situation and neither of us were getting any younger. out of this round we got our little boy, who is 3months old, however I'm feeling deflated, as I had suggested to my best mate (who was single at the time and didn't exactly want kids) that she should put her name on the list. she met a partner and they have now became pregnant via the reciprocal route. I'm so happy for them, but I can't help but feel slightly gutted. As I started the process for all of us and it feels like I'm the only one out of the 4 people that has played no part in the process if that makes sense. I just keep trying to put it to the back of my mind I'm 40 now, and my wife keeps reassuring me, I'm just feeling lost.

[JA-fnuk Partner Nurse Fertility Network UK]

Do not be so hard on yourself - as you say you started this process - so have played a very important part . Exciting times ahead for you and your partner as you start your journey as a family.

Take care

Janet-Partner

[lilleyofthevalley in reply to JA-fnuk]

Thank you Janet! I love our wee boy and wouldn't change him I guess I'm just feeling like I haven't contributed. not my egg and not my pregnancy. feeling it tough

[Rox28]

You have a little boy, time is short don't spend it thinking about the past, focus on your future the "what is". It doesn't matter who did what, it matters what you've got, your being there will have been more support than you know.

[lilleyofthevalley in reply to Rox28]

Rox Thank you so much - sometimes you just need to hear other people's perspectives on your situation to bring it in to focus.