BFN 🥺: We are devastated and I'm... - Fertility Network UK

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BFN 🥺

Sunflower8686 profile image
13 Replies

We are devastated and I'm feeling physically and emotionally not well. Our second round this time with a 3 day transfer of 2 which failed. I don't have anyone close who's gone through this and just need messages of support. I want to try again with time but I have nothing in storage so it's starting the process from the start again. I'm 38 and I've only ever got 5 eggs on both rounds. 1st round was one early blastocyst, 2nd round was 2 early 3 day embryos. This was with increased drugs. We have to do ICSI due to my partner. I need some hope that it can work.. I'm trying to see the positives but this journey has been so tough for us both 🥺

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Sunflower8686
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13 Replies
Minniemouse88 profile image
Minniemouse88

Just wanted to say I'm sorry. I'm right here with you only a few days after my chemical pregnancy and feel absolutely bereft and exhausted after such a long journey. Take good care and know you are not alone xx

Sunflower8686 profile image
Sunflower8686 in reply toMinniemouse88

Thank you 🥺 I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm sat in the garden and I hadn't noticed at first until it made itself known but a robin appeared incredibly close. That's never happened before, it made me emotional but also offered some comfort.

Crazycatlady007 profile image
Crazycatlady007 in reply toMinniemouse88

Just wanted to send you lots of love - so sorry to hear this.

I’m with you in the trenches of an empty sac at 7 weeks with nothing left in the freezer and having to start again.

This whole thing is just so so hard but we have each other xxxxx

MiniCeeCee profile image
MiniCeeCee

incredibly sorry to hear this, was rooting for you. Take some time to be sad, and know that this doesn’t have to be the end of your hope xxx

Sunflower8686 profile image
Sunflower8686 in reply toMiniCeeCee

Thank you, I'm just so sad right now 😔

Millbanks profile image
Millbanks

I'm so sorry lovely, it's a brutal journey. Try to give yourself a little time to grieve but also I always found that just cracking on really helped me to feel better.

I would talk to your consultant about other possible tests that you might want to try before your next transfer too. For me, the immune blood tests were critical to getting our BFP but we waited until we'd had 5 failed transfers to try it. I wish I'd done it sooner.

Wishing you lots of luck xxx

Sunflower8686 profile image
Sunflower8686 in reply toMillbanks

Thank you for the kind words. Is there any tests in particular or questions I should be asking the consultant? I'm completely lost and can't understand why both have failed.

Millbanks profile image
Millbanks in reply toSunflower8686

I would ask about immune testing xx

CyclingAddict profile image
CyclingAddict

Sorry to hear you're going through this. Just wanted to send a message of hope. I'm currently 34 weeks pregnant with my ICSI baby. He was my 6th transfer (I had 4 failed and 1 chemical pregnancy before). It can happen.

Sending you luck x

Sunflower8686 profile image
Sunflower8686 in reply toCyclingAddict

Thank you so much. Did you do anything different? I'm not sure where to go from here or what to ask my consultant

CyclingAddict profile image
CyclingAddict in reply toSunflower8686

We did. So I did the Alice, Emma and ERA testing and, based off those results, my consultant altered my protocol. My husband, who has a low sperm count, also managed to up his sperm count from 1-3 million (3 different initial tests gave him the result of 1, 2 and 3 million) to 10 million. He was taking a lot of supplements and wearing underwear that had an ice pack in the evenings (think they were called 'snow balls' on amazon, lol). It was definitely a combined effort!

Lelo3479 profile image
Lelo3479

So sorry to hear this Sunflower ❤️💐, please remember all the hope you can grasp from other's repeated tries then successes when you're ready. Please take care of your self and don't be scared to ask for help and support from your GP. Thinking of you x

Sunflower8686 profile image
Sunflower8686 in reply toLelo3479

Thank you, I'm going to take up the counselling offered by the hospital. You get a few sessions included in the treatment package. I think it will help as I didn't use them before but I think this time I need to talk it through with an expert.

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