Sigh. Sooooo gutted. Went for our viability scan today and he could no longer see sac. Started bleeding last Monday, stopped the following day - convinced I was having a miscarriage but an early scan that Tuesday showed everything looked great for 5 weeks 4 days, confirmed with two HCG tests. I’ve been bleeding/clotting since Friday - went for second early scan on Saturday and was reassured that everything looked great, we even got to see a heartbeat unexpectedly. Fast forward 3 days and it’s all over. Went to the clinic today thinking all my questions would be centred around pessaries, as the sonographer from Saturday really made us believe it was the pessaries that were causing the bleed.
Second transfer and second miscarriage, anxiety levels are definitely rising. First miscarriage was almost instant with a day 3 grade 1 embryo, this time made it a few weeks later but with a 5AA embryo. I have four embryos left and I’m wondering whether to push for getting them all genetically tested? The doctor today seemed reluctant saying testing is usually only offered to older patients (I just turned 34 on Monday) but I’m confused about what age has to do with it with a emerging track record of miscarriages…
Not really sure what I’m trying to gain from this post. I have my follow up consultation next week so I guess I can find out what options are available to me…. But I really feel like I want some extra tests before attempting my third transfer.
hope everyone else is having a better week than me! 🧡
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DLZ321
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Thanks for your reply. I’m unsure what I want - I think I need to read a bit more on what tests can be done, it just seems wild to keep transferring and having bad outcomes. Have you had any testing done yourself?
He did mention yesterday usually they look into testing after three failed attempts but I’m feeling like if they’re using ‘best’ embryos first, and two have failed already then surely the chances will get lower as they work through the rest?
I did three back to back collections and have three that made it to day 5 and 3 day 3’s. I’ve used two already and I’m feeling like I’m going to be back to egg collections before I know it 😫 though I’d happily start another round of injections tomorrow than sit through another four miscarriages, save myself months and months of misery and anxiety.
No it's fine rant away I don't mind. Don't lose hope in the embryos - I'd go for the testing to put your mind at rest.
I have never had a miscarriage but I've often thought it's better for me getting a negative pregnancy test than to suffer a miscarriage as it must be terribly hard.
You’re right, it is like I’m losing hope in our embryos and I know that’s probably so silly after two attempts when many others have had many more transfers.
I actually said the same thing to my husband after my first miscarriage because I was soooo sure I wasn’t pregnant, home test came back as positive (for the first ever time) which was obviously a total total surprise, but that then came crashing down when my hcg was low & continued to fall. It felt unnecessarily cruel when I had already come to terms with not being pregnant before my home test.
That being said, it doesn’t take away from the overwhelming disappointment we all carry on this horrible journey, whichever form that may be in!
Really sorry for your losses, I can only imagine how stressful and sad the situation is right now and how you might be feeling.
I did embryo banking with PGT testing this year and a whole lot of tests to prep for transfer, and I read a lot about every step of the way - I'm not good at going with the flow... About the testing, we were told we had to do it before freezing the embryos as otherwise we would risk losing them with the two thawing/freezing processes. Also, we got told only day 5 blastocysts would be sent for testing as day 3s are too small and don't have enough cells to take the sample without damaging the embryo. Ask your clinic about what would they propose, but be mindful it may not be the best course of action at this point.
Have you been checked for chronic endometritis? Our consultant decided to do a hysteroscopy before we did any transfer to ensure my endometrium was perfect, and I had my transfer delayed 2months to get the CE treated and an endometrium scratch, as I didn't have many embryos frozen and we didn't want to risk any of them, our consultant focus became getting me in the best position possible. Maybe it's worth checking with your clinic if they could check for CE? It is less invasive than checking the embryos.
Give yourself some time and space first, and recover, this whole process requires so much energy and takes out soooo much from us, that I now think the two months I had to go around have allowed me to get some strength back before the next stage. Hope you get some good answers soon, and next transfer is your winning one 🤞
We asked about thawing rates with testing and he said the chances of damage are very very minimal, but I guess I should read up a bit more on this. We only have one top quality day 5 blast so I’m trying to figure out how I’d feel if it didn’t survive for whatever reason!
When you say to be mindful it may not be the best course of action, do you mean the PGT testing or do you mean whatever the clinic suggests may not be the best?
I’ve not been checked for endometritis, and actually didn’t even know what it was - had to google. I will definitely bring this up at our consultation.
It’s a real rollercoaster, I felt so optimistic starting off IVF and as time goes on I can definitely feel a cloud of doom coming over me, it’s hard not knowing how long this journey will go on for.
I have lots of family visiting next week from abroad which will be a welcome distraction!
Our clinic was really strict on no thawing for testing as they felt it was unnecessarily risking the embryo, so they did say if we wanted the testing to do it before freezing. It may be a thing of only our clinic, but reading through the internet I found more studies about failed thawing processes etc, which made me go for the testing before freezing. I was surprised when I got the diagnosis of chronic endometritis at how frequent it is in women with infertility, but I had not heard about it until I had the biopsy results. And the treatment was two full weeks of antibiotics and a second biopsy with scratch to fully clear it out.
It is an emotionally draining process. Enjoy your family time and leave all this ivf on the side for a while. I took on an allotment after EC to keep my mind busy with something else than waiting for PGT results, dates for next tests, firming up transfer date, etc. and it did helped massively to feel a bit more like myself and see things with some perspective. This forum is great for supporting each other and I hope you start to feel a bit better soon 🙂
Oh gosh really! Your clinic also sounds very thorough, are they based in London? If one clinic totally advises against it then that definitely makes me feel uneasy! Maybe it’s something I will keep in mind if I need to do another three cycle package instead.
Is the process painful for chronic endometriosis? And if you don’t mind me asking did you have success after the process?
It’s really hard to give myself time when I’m constantly hearing the tick of my biological clock 😂 part of me finds the time in between quite hard, I just want to crack on. That being said, at least I can have a couple guilt free days of eating and drinking whatever I fancy. Taking on an allotment sounds so therapeutic and lovely ☺️ x
I’m so sorry. I agree that adding another freeze and thaw isn’t a good idea. We were offered batching with freezing all and then thawing and testing all recently. But on researching and discussion with another specialist we have opted to test after each collection and freeze as we go so embryos are only subjected to freeze and thaw once. Adds a lot of expense though.
Thanks for your reply. This is really helpful, you guys have definitely made me reconsider! I will explore other tests for now and perhaps keep that for later down the line if I need to do further collections. Have you had any other tests done? Everytime I feel I’ve read up a lot on something, a new area of IVF is unlocked 😂 I’ve read quite a bit on the diet, egg collection & transfer part but absolutely nothing on testing embryos.
It’s such a lot to learn! I’ve done it all now I think - endometrial biopsy, hysteroscopy, recurrent implantation failure/miscarriage bloods, NK cell testing via Warwick uni research clinic. It means I’m on steroids and blood thinners for transfer and after positive pregnancy test. I really wish you so much luck xx
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