Pulling on one side and back aches… What is normal??? Overthinking is exhausting!

[Saskiahope]

I’m going a bit crazy.

Anyone else lol??!!?

I’m 6 weeks 3 days pregnant but everything is worrying me.

I can’t go to the loo without thinking blood is gonna be there… ohhh it’s so nerve wracking.

Today my back aches on the right lower side.

And I feel I’m generally always experiencing a dull pulling / ache on my right side near ish my right ovary.

I’ve checked some past posts on this group and some say they had this and everything was fine. But my inner demon caved to googling it and now I’m really worried. I have my first scan next Wednesday, so gotta try to keep it together till then but it’s soooo hard.

For anyone else worrying or going out of their mind, I feel your pain!

Gosh, this process requires so much strength doesn’t it.

Xxx

[Livinginoz]

Hi,

So this is literally me right now! I’m 6 weeks today, all day yesterday I had lots of cramping and pulling pains and convinced myself the worst was going to happen, constantly checking for blood. My scan is next Wednesday too. I’m overthinking everything and I’m constantly stressed out 🙈

It’s my first pregnancy so I can’t say whether all this is normal or not but just wanted to say you’re not alone! X

[Saskiahope in reply to Livinginoz]

I feel your pain. Big hugs your way!

I feel for me it’s been a really hard stage, and I’ve heard others describe it as one of the hardest parts too. It’s a lot of waiting and being in limbo, my brain is yo-yoing between I’m pregnant but it could go wrong, but it could also be ok… I don’t dare get excited to protect myself from disappointment and every sign I see as a possible cause for concern, although on the other side I’m have moments of happiness and read that my concerns could actually be indicators that it’s going well!!! What a whirlwind!

We only have a few days realistically to get through, so perhaps we need to get very distracted! I will be thinking of you on Wednesday 🤞 (seems we’re on the same timeline!) . Really hoping it all goes well for us!

We all deserve a medal in my option whatever stage we are at, this ivf madness can take it out of you! X

Edit *

*

I meant to say that I messaged my clinic with my concerns and they said the following, they were quite reassuring:

“ …lot of ladies experience these symptoms in this early stage, it all sounds like normal aches and pains due to the changes being incurred by the progesterone and changes in hormones in your body due to the pregnancy. Try not to worry …”

I hope that is reassuring for you too xxx

[orangecatmum in reply to Saskiahope]

I cannot explain how much you sound EXACTLY like me right now. My mental load is insane! I'll have moments where I feel nothing and am calm, then 2 mins later the twinges and cramps start and I spiral, and then go back and forth all day between reasoning with myself, worrying it's all about to end and that I got too 'cocky', reading everyone else's stories online of all the same symptoms and their outcomes, and then doing it all over again on a loop. And it's also never not on my mind.I've been having on and off cramps/twinges etc, some brown/pink spotting and a few other symptoms, and I don't know where I stand! Am only 5 weeks 1 day so my 7 week scan is nearly 2 weeks away, no idea how I'll cope that long 😅

I hope you're feeling OK and taking solace in those stronger moments, and knowing that those more fretful ones are just temporary. I have to keep reminding myself: your anxious thoughts are not the truth.

Also that note from your clinic is fab, thank you for sharing x

[Livinginoz in reply to Saskiahope]

The whole process is just horrendous. I didn’t think anything could be worse than the TWW but this is worse by miles, I guess because we definitely have something to lose now!

I’m completely protecting myself and not letting myself get too excited, but every now and then if I have a wave of nausea and my boobs hurt I get a little moment of ‘maybe this is our time’. Just the same, I read about these symptoms being positive things but I get scared nonetheless. I’m just so guarded 🙈

Thank you for sharing the message from your clinic - my clinic said similar to me verbally when I last spoke to them but I can’t help overthinking everything. Fingers crossed these few days go quickly and we get the reassurance we need!

orangecatmum sounds like we’re all in the same stress boat! X

[orangecatmum in reply to Livinginoz]

We really are! Reading you is like reading about myself, ha. It's that mix of self-protection and excitement, but we should be excited!

We SHOULD be thinking 'this is our time' because, logically, there is more chance of success at this point than failure, right? That's what I keep telling myself. X

[Saskiahope in reply to orangecatmum]

You’re right, I’m gonna try to hold onto that thought! We gotta grasp all our personal resources and focus, we can do this! The scans aren’t that far away really, although it feels like they are, but think how much waiting we’ve all done already, years really! We got this!!!

Will be thinking of you and good luck to us all!!! Xxxxx

[Livinginoz in reply to orangecatmum]

You’re exactly right. I think once I hear that heartbeat maybe I’ll be able to settle and enjoy it a little. I was reading last night on the NHS website you should tell your GP you’re pregnant as soon as you find out - I can’t even bring myself to do that until it’s confirmed by the scan! It’s just crazy really isn’t it xx

[orangecatmum in reply to Livinginoz]

My IVF clinic said I didn't need to but actually I ended up needing to get a higher dose of levothyroxine (I'm seeing a private endocrinologist and he told me to go up) so I had to explain to my GP to get the prescription. But I didn't want to yet, ha! I wanted to wait until that 7 week scan. I feel like I've jinxed it - which is so painfully stupid. My brain has gone all medieval with superstition even though I am such a logical person 😂

And Saskiahope this is so true. It isnt far - in normal life a week/2 weeks is no time at all. But in this it's an eternity! And the thought of another 35 weeks of stress... 💀 ha

[Livinginoz in reply to orangecatmum]

I think the same, if I do x y or z I will jinx it! I did CBT previously and that gave me loads of strategies for dealing with anxiety and reasoning stuff out - literally none of it works with this 😂 don’t know how I’m going to do another how many months of this.

I think the reason I’m scared of jinxing it with the GP is when I had a chemical last time I started bleeding just after I came off the phone to the clinic to tell them I had a BFP 🙈

[Saskiahope in reply to Livinginoz]

It’s crazy what we get in our mind isn’t it! My therapist said there are many things we can’t will (such as getting pregnant), and I think we have to apply that concept to everything… things will either go one way or another and it won’t be due to what ever said or done, it will just be how it is. But it’s hard to keep level headed isn’t it!!! And also the fact that there is no real control can be so hard too! Roll on successful scans for everyone please (fingers crossed, touch wood… lol 🙈🙈🙈🤞🤞🤞) !!! Xxxx

[Livinginoz in reply to Saskiahope]

Your therapist is so right. I need to put that on post it notes and put it round the house 😂

Keeping everything crossed for these scans!! Xx

[Alexie07]

I’m a bit confused by these posts. Technically I’m 6 weeks but based off Hcg not rising enough they’ve told me it’ll just end in a chemical so I’m waiting to bleed. Are you not having your Hcg tested regularly?

[Saskiahope in reply to Alexie07]

Hi, I’m so so sorry for your loss

No my clinic hasn’t done any HCG testing, not sure if that’s because I’m NHS… or perhaps it’s not their protocol…

I have my first scan next Wednesday.

[Alexie07 in reply to Saskiahope]

Thank you. They tested mine 4 times in 2 weeks and then made that call and stopped presseries. Hope it works out for you.

[Saskiahope in reply to Alexie07]

Thank you. Thinking of you. This journey can be so brutal, I hope you’re holding up. Reading through posts there seems to be quite a bit of hope after loss, I hope you get to where you want to be soon x

[DianeArnold Partner Nurse Fertility Network UK]

Hi. Remember you can move over to Pregnancy after Treatment Forum now you are over six weeks. Hope all continues as it should. Diane

[Saskiahope in reply to DianeArnold]

Thanks Diane

[Livinginoz in reply to DianeArnold]

Hi, do you have a link for this forum as I can’t seem to find it?

[Skittles11 in reply to Livinginoz]

healthunlocked.com/fertilit...

[Livinginoz in reply to Skittles11]

Thank you - I’m already in this but thought it was as something else 🙈

[Saskiahope in reply to Livinginoz]

Yeah I’m part of it too, but I still sort of feel like I don’t belong in it yet 🙈. Xxx

[Dotty0483]

Hi,

I am currently just over 16 weeks pregnant. This is not an IVF pregnancy, as after a couple of rounds, we decided not to carry on and let our faith decide whether or not we will have children. The pain and aches you are describing were very similar to mine. I panicked every time I went to the bathroom. Try to stay positive and do not think about the worst. Period pains are absolutely normal at any stage of pregnancy. I am sending you a lot of love and wish you the best during your pregnancy xxx

[Saskiahope in reply to Dotty0483]

Thank you so much, that’s quite reassuring although I’m sure that’s made you feel nervous at times! Sounds like from lots of people it’s rather common.

Wishing you all the best and hoping things continue to go well for you x

[Here4ivfinfo]

I have never been pregnant so I’m not sure why I’m chipping in but I think if I were pregnant I would be the same. I think I’d be doing pregnancy tests every morning, symptom checking and juts generally feeling up and down about it for the first trimester. I just feel like when you have struggled so much and you’ve read so many stories you can’t help but doubt whether it’s finally actually happening. Sending love and luck xxxx

[Saskiahope in reply to Here4ivfinfo]

Sounds like you totally get it, and good luck moving forward with your treatment!

I think it’s the struggles we’ve been through that amplify the worry when we do get one step further in the journey. Plus something I realise about my personality is that to protect myself somehow I’ve developed a habit of expecting the worse… and have battled that at every stage. And then mix that with the hormonal changes and it’s a perfect storm for worry and anxiety!

I have found this group has helped me to understand that the worrying is a shared experience. It’s given me support and also helped me to communicate with my partner about how many people worry in our boat, and it’s not that I’m not coping as such, but it sort of perhaps comes with the territory for some of us.

Sending love and strength to all.

One foot in front of the other, one day at a time. Xxx

[KHRAM]

Exactly in the same position as you, feeling so anxious, I’m also spotting on and off which is nerve wracking, I had a scan on Thursday saw the heartbeat which only helped with my anxiety for like half a day Ofcourse I was very happy as I never got to this stage but as soon my boobs are not as sore or I see the spotting again I feel like everything is going wrong!

It’s so so hard, I have another scan next Friday with my immunologist before my intralipids infusion but just feel absolute helpless 🙁😒

[Saskiahope in reply to KHRAM]

I’m so sorry you’re feeling like this, and it’s no surprise after all that you have been through, it’s so tough isn’t it!

Someone said earlier about holding onto facts and what you know, and one fact you could try to use to feel less helpless is that you are indeed pregnant and there is a heartbeat, that is true now, so try if you can to stay in the now rather than thinking too far ahead.

But I do know that’s easier said than done.

I’ve read countless posts on here about people spotting all the way through their pregnancies and their babies being absolutely fine. I also read that it’s natural for pregnancy symptoms to come and go… judging on the fact you’ve already had one good scan I’d say the odds and in your favour, I will be thinking of you and I hope when you get the all good with that next scan it might reassure you. But again we can all just message if we need more reassurance, we’re all in this together .

I think the truth is in many ways our symptoms don’t tell us a huge amount as they can mean things are going to plan or something else, so us overthinking just makes us suffer. So tough isn’t it.

I wonder what we could all do to help each other or ourselves… perhaps we need to start suggesting distractions! I watched all of Bridgerton for example and that for some moments took my mind off things…

I have also been thinking about how our hormones are really messing probably with our perspective. My lovely lovely partner made a comment about a film we were just watching and I felt I was going to burst into tears, plus I was a mess during the opening ceremony wise listening to Céline Dion last night, I can tell my hormones all over the place, so this is bound to impact how we feel about the process and how we react to it too, so try to be kind to yourself because you’re so deserved feel okay.

Thinking of you and sending you lots of well wishes for your next scan and for all of us! We got this xxxx