3rd Round failed of IVF…Loosing hope 😢

[KiteRunner123]

Just wanted to come on here for some support as I feel Iv hit rock bottom. 5 years now of infertility and from that we have had 5 transfers, 2 miscarriages and now another failed attempt. If we do decide to go ahead we will be going to another clinic and paying for this treatment. Just not sure what to do feel so lost and down. Just wanted to hear some stories of how people kept going and had success! My question is when do you stop? How long do you keep going? It’s just awful! Xx

[Tir-26]

It’s very tough and im so sorry your having to experience this 💔

I’m still on this path too, multiple transfers and loss, In the past I’ve said I’d give up when I turned 40, I’ve just turned 40 and I’ve no plans or thoughts on giving up. From stories I’ve read, some people come to a decision without much thought, it just kina closes quick, enough is enough. Just thought I’d share as I know exactly how your feeling, give yourself time and be sad, don’t suppress it. Our much wanted babies will come soon x

[KiteRunner123 in reply to Tir-26]

Thanks so much for replying! I know everyone’s story is different. Sometimes I just think that will never be me! I think im going to change clinics and just see if that makes a difference. Xx

[ET54AA]

Hi, I am 41 and started with IVF last year. Had two cycles of IVF. Failed both of them. I asked my doctor for an ovarian rejuvenation even though I still have eggs. He said that it will help. I am lost as well don't know what to do. I have no intention of giving up but will I ever be able to become pregnant is my worry.

I don't know how old are you but maybe try to change the doctor.

One of my friend tried multiple IVFs in Turkey she failed. At the age of 45 she gave birth to her baby. The protocols in Turkey didn't work for her. She finally succeeded in Belgium.

[Doodlebug23]

Hi, are you using a UK clinic? I feel based on research that clinics abroad are much better and more advanced. Have you looked at refund programmes? Sorry if that’s not much help. I’m 47 and still chasing that dream. I’ve just had my 4th transfer but have 6 Frosties from my second round (donor). Sending you hugs and baby dust ✨

[Bexarama83]

it’s so hard to keep going but my view was, to keep trying until there were no options left. I am 37weeks pregnant on my 6th transfer, this was my only pgta normal tested embryo after 5 failed transfers, 2 being mmc. My last resort was pgta after the 2 miscarriages, and I was so positive about this transfer, had Accupuncture, got into the right frame of mind even though I turned 40 just before transfer. But what’s right for me isn’t necessarily right for you, only you can decide when to stop. Keep seeking the options and making rationale decisions and best of luck in whatever you decide xx

[Me_and_Sparkle]

so sorry to read about your journey - it’s not fair and I hope you will get some success in your next cycle.

I have more than one friend who tried (one 5 cycles with the NHS). Multiple cycles with the NHS and failing. They then switched to private and worked right away.

Sometimes the right doctors and embryologists can work wonders. Xx

[KiteRunner123]

thank you so much everyone. I am using UK clinic but NHS. We have decided to keep going but we are changing clinic. Iv heard good stories about this one so fingers crossed. We have “unexplained infertility” so I feel like we never get an answer. I do have endo, but they don’t really seem to know if it’s that either. So always just stuck in limbo! Thanks for all the advice! X

[Purplehedgehog87]

We are similar situation and are just embarking on private. I have done lots of research on clinics and even ones abroad have similar statistics but I think they are maybe better at thinking outside the box and are keen to get success as that way they make more money and gets recommendations for new clients.

We have decided to do 2 more IVF/ICSI with a plan (not refund as not eligible due to previous failed ivf) but it works out much better. This clinic really listened, we learned more in 1 hour then 3 years with NHS and got taken seriously. We now have an approach which is much more individualised and I feel will work much better with my body. We have also considered donor and are likely to go abroad for that if it gets to that point.

I have been battling so much with what we do, where we go, how much we spend and for us, we are still managing well as a couple (others I know it put too much on them so they stopped), we feel we were mismanaged before and would regret not trying this completely different approach.

we have some money available and plan to use some 0% credit cards and just keep balance transferring but equally we don't want to get into crippling debt and with my underlying health issues I can't physically do many more.

It feels lonely but lots of people are feeling this too but unfortunately I have found everyones journey to be very different and so it is a very personal choice. I cannot recommend enough though self care like massage, acupuncture, speaking to fertility counsellor, having that nice hot chocolate etc to help through all this x

[KiteRunner123 in reply to Purplehedgehog87]

Thank you that’s lovely advice. I’m ringing a private clinic today you’re right I need a fresh pair of eyes on our situation. Something that can make sense. I don’t want to give up especially when we have had positive tests. It just gets so overwhelming at times.