heart-breaking news on viability scan... - Fertility Network UK

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heart-breaking news on viability scan - any Positive stories on 2nd try?

Hopewhite profile image
16 Replies

Hi i hope you're all doing well in this crazy journey xx

We just had our viability scan today at 7 week 4 days , unfortunately it didn't look positive, the nurses couldn't find a heartbeat anymore, they have referred me to the early pregnancy unit for another scan tomorrow afternoon to confirm what they have seen.

It's heart-breaking as we were very hopeful despite having had hematoma and bleeding at 6 weeks, on the early scan they could see a heartbeat, it looks like the bleeding got worst internally, so just need to get confirmation tomorrow.

I'm trying to remain positive, and think that nature is very wise and if it didn't work is because it wasn't right this time, and that we can try our luck again, and hoping we'd get better results next time.

Do you have any advice on how to bounce back from this and any positive stories to share ?? my heart is slightly crushed today, so it will be helpful to read how have you warriors got through this xx.

Many thanks in advance, wishing you all the best in your journeys xx

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Hopewhite profile image
Hopewhite
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16 Replies
CornflowerMoon profile image
CornflowerMoon

Hey, I don't really have anything I can say in answer to your questions but I just want to say I'm really sorry for what you're going through. Thinking of you x

Hopewhite profile image
Hopewhite in reply to CornflowerMoon

thank you CornflowerMoon ♥️, I wish you all the best of luck in your pregnancy journey I hope everything keeps developing perfectly xx

JA-fnuk profile image
JA-fnukPartnerNurseFertility Network UK

Hope you have people around you for support- will be thinking about you tomorrow

Take care

Janet

Hopewhite profile image
Hopewhite in reply to JA-fnuk

thank you Janet ♥️

Elmo13 profile image
Elmo13

Hi Hopewhite,

Just wanted to say I’m so sorry about what you’re going through. I have been in the same situation myself where I had a silent miscarriage and I know how devastating it can be.

If I remember correctly I think this may be your first transfer and so it must really feel like you’re on an emotional rollercoaster from a high to low. It’s hard because your body still believes you’re pregnant and you experience the pregnancy symptoms even though it’s not viable.

It was a bit of a dark time for me shortly after my miscarriage, but with time it does get a lot better. I too came to the understanding that this was natures way and it simply wasn’t meant to be. I had a surgical d&c after mine as wanted it over so I could start getting better mentally and physically. I was told at that time that you're more likely to get pregnant again after a miscarriage so don’t lose hope. I did get pregnant again on my next FET but unfortunately was not to be- but that’s a different matter and there’s no reason your situation will be similar to mine!

Hope you can get some time off work so you can just come to terms with what’s happening as it’s a lot. Surround yourself with people, things, and tv programmes that that lift you and pls be kind to yourself.

Thinking of you.

X

Forgot to add, your clinic may offer you a therapy session so may be worth taking them up on it.

Hopewhite profile image
Hopewhite in reply to Elmo13

hi Elmo thank you very much for taking the time to share your experience and for your kind words, I’m sorry that you also have experienced losses and a tough journey xx

It’s been a stressful 2 weeks since the hematoma made its appearance, they reassured us with an early scan at 6 weeks where they saw a heartbeat but unfortunately I had further bleeding after that and is not looking that promising anymore. I’ll see what they say on the scan tomorrow and what options are available, it is indeed our first fresh transfer , if everything is confirmed as per today’s scan, I’d like it to be a natural process, I feel my body has gone through a lot in the past 2 months, but I need more information to make this decision.

They did offer counselling but I’ve not digested it all just yet so I didn’t feel like talking my heart out to a stranger, but I may change my mind.

Thank you so much again for your kind advice, I hope this journey brings us both some joy in the near future, wishing you all the best of luck xx

ButtercupGarden profile image
ButtercupGarden

Hi Hopewhite. So sorry to hear your news, it is devastating. I just wanted to say that I had a similar experience, MMC at 7 weeks last August and was completely crushed by it. We tried again in November and this time the little bean stuck. I'm now almost 37 weeks pregnant and just waiting to meet her! I remember feeling so dark in the days and weeks after my miscarriage but there will be better days and you can try again once you feel mentally and physically ready for it. Be kind to yourself and take it one day at a time! Xxx

Hopewhite profile image
Hopewhite in reply to ButtercupGarden

hi Buttercupgarden thank you so much for your kind words, it does give me hope for the future, I wish you all the best with your pregnancy, I bet you cannot wait to have your little rainbow baby with you xx

Daughterofaking profile image
Daughterofaking

So sorry to read this. I know it's hard moving from high to low. But want to assure you that it's all for the best as nature' takes its course when something isn't that right. Want you to know that the next one will be it and who knows it might be a natural pregnancy as alot of people do after a loss. Be kind to yourself and surround yourself with people with positive energy. sending some hugs xx

Hopewhite profile image
Hopewhite in reply to Daughterofaking

thank you very much for your kind words xx I do share your thoughts nature is very wise, although I’m very sad I’m trying to remain positive and I hope our dream comes true v. soon xx

All the best of luck in your journey xx

Daughterofaking profile image
Daughterofaking in reply to Hopewhite

I know. You should feel sad because we are human. We all want a positive outcome. Our dreams will surly come true, I believe so. All the best and thank you. Xx

1418rose profile image
1418rose

Morning I had the same news as you at 7 week scan a non viable pregnancy they called it, I stopped all medication and let nature do its thing it started on a Thursday morning and it was the hardest thing ever my husband said he would come home to be with me but I just wanted to be on my own I pushed People away and I shouldn't of done, I was still really heavly bleeding on the Friday so my husband took me to hospital where I ended up in theater for retained tissue, so please be mindful yes the process is painful but u shouldn't still be bleeding and passing clots for more than 6 hours I think I was told.... we went on to have a second transfer (top grade embryos) which was unsuccessful just didn't take I'm thinking 3 months wasn't enough healing time, and 3rd transfer (middle and low grade) we decided we had been through so much let's transfer 2 so we did.. only 1 took and we are now 17 weeks pregnant today, don't give up hope and never give up trying xx good luck for your next transfer xx

Hopewhite profile image
Hopewhite in reply to 1418rose

thank you so much for taking the time to share your experience, I’ve also opted for letting nature take its course as I feel my body needs a break, I’m a bit scared of the unknown so thanks for explaining this xx

It’s great to read you’re now on your third time lucky !! I wish you all the best for your pregnancy xx stories like this truly give me hope xx thank you again for sharing

CecileM profile image
CecileM

Hi Hopewhite,

I can only feel your pain having been through the same process myself over the last few days… in my case, I had an early HCG levels issue where levels wouldn’t initially double, but then would… so a bit of a rollercoaster there already. At the 6-week scan, they told me the embryo was growing too slowly and that it wasn’t promising. It was SO difficult to hear and digest. I came back in for a scan at 7 weeks and 5 days, where they confirmed it wasn’t a viable pregnancy… They referred me to another clinic to assess my options.

I wasn’t recommended the natural way to get rid of it, as it can take a while (we took a lot of meds during the cycle!) and some bits can still be in your uterus afterwards… We also wanted to avoid D&C, as I feared it may damage my lining (which is my main problem in not getting pregnant as it’s too thin). So I went for the medical solution (tablets) - I did that over the last 2 days and last night I felt and saw the gestational sac and placenta in the toilet. Such a weird and sad moment … but it wasn’t painful. In fact the entire process was much less uncomfortable than I thought it would be - I was terrified before starting.

As you said, nature is wise and it clearly wasn’t meant to be. I have moments where I’m okay with it, and others where I can’t stop crying… it’s such a difficult journey. But there’s always hope. So let’s keep on believing and trying until we decide it’s time to move on :)

Hopewhite profile image
Hopewhite in reply to CecileM

hi Cecile , thank you so much for sharing , my heart goes out to you too , so sorry that you are also going through this xx I have got the confirmation today with a second scan, luckily I was prepared for it after yesterday. I’m still very sad but I think I ran out of tears yesterday (I’m sure they’ll come back) and coming to terms with it now knowing that nature has done the right thing. I’m just waiting for it to take its course , I’ll try this for a week and might change my mind after if I have no luck ! I send you a big hug, like you said we have to keep believing and our dream will come true hopefully v. soon xx

CecileM profile image
CecileM in reply to Hopewhite

Very sorry about the confirmation of your sad news :( Yes, your tears may come back, but if they don’t, it’s okay as well. I personally find that they come and go, although right now I just feel numb - it’s such a draining process you get used to being disappointed, move on and try again. Not sure if that’s the best way to go about it but I think we’re all managing to the best of our ability, and there is no right or wrong answer!

Good luck for the next few days and ensure to take time for you and you only. My acupuncturist recommended me to watch comedies, as this would allow my body to relax, embrace the situation, and be better prepared for the miscarriage (i.e. make it less painful physically). It initially felt counter intuitive to try and make myself laugh but I think it actually helped… Maybe give it a go! Wishing you the best of luck.

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