Just sad…: Hi lovelies, Feeling very... - Fertility Network UK

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Just sad…

PPea profile image
PPea
37 Replies

Hi lovelies,

Feeling very sad… my OTD is on the 26 but I’ve tested today and it’s negative 🥺 by now it should be at least a faint line and nothing…

I am 43, so I don’t have much time and also money, so maybe we can go one more try (maybe with donor eggs). I just don’t know what to do now.

Everyone was just so positive through the entire process (and I am thankful for that) but I guess I got carried away and thought this would work first time around… so naive of me…

Sorry for the rant.

Good luck to you all 🍀

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PPea profile image
PPea
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37 Replies
JA-fnuk profile image
JA-fnukPartnerNurseFertility Network UK

Thinking of you and sending a big hug especially for you

Take care

Janet

PPea profile image
PPea in reply to JA-fnuk

Thank you Janet 🤍

Tir-26 profile image
Tir-26

not naive and feel your sadness, lots of support at this time

PPea profile image
PPea in reply to Tir-26

Thank you sjlrun 🤍

Catkt profile image
Catkt

Just sending you a virtual hug. X

PPea profile image
PPea in reply to Catkt

Thank you for the hug 🤍

butterfliez profile image
butterfliez

I am so sorry , sending you strength xx

PPea profile image
PPea in reply to butterfliez

Thank you butterfliez 🤍

Orangeflowers profile image
Orangeflowers

Thinking of you. So sorry this time didn't work for you x

PPea profile image
PPea in reply to Orangeflowers

Thank you 🤍

Anoncasper profile image
Anoncasper

I’m so sorry PPea 😢

I was the same as you. I thought my first try would work and that would be it. Just doesn’t seem to be that simple which is massively disappointing.

I had my OTD today and I was negative so I feel your pain ❤️

Big hugs to you ❤️ I hope you get your little miracle next time round xxx

PPea profile image
PPea in reply to Anoncasper

Thank you Anoncasper, so sorry for you too...let's hope next time will bring us our little miracle 🤍

Anoncasper profile image
Anoncasper in reply to PPea

I really hope so! Fingers crossed we get our little miracles soon ❤️ xx

Daisy-Delilah profile image
Daisy-Delilah

hi Ppea, sorry to hear this, sending you big hugs!

I don’t think it’s naive at all, you have to try to think positively when going through this process I think. Xxx

PPea profile image
PPea in reply to Daisy-Delilah

It's true, I'd rather be positive, it was just a rant... Thank for the support 🤍

Ajtart profile image
Ajtart

I'm so sorry to hear this x

PPea profile image
PPea in reply to Ajtart

Thank you 🤍

Muppetgirl profile image
Muppetgirl

Feel your pain but just in case you need a little hope. My test was negative on OTD. Luckily I had bloods done and am now just playing pirates with my 3 year old. I was 44!

PPea profile image
PPea in reply to Muppetgirl

Thank you Muppetgirl! My blood test is today, I should expect the results later on. Now I have a little glimmer of hope...🤍

Twiglet2 profile image
Twiglet2

I’m so sorry 😢 be kind to yourself xx

PPea profile image
PPea in reply to Twiglet2

Thank you 🤍 I am trying, but it's difficult not to feel that my body is letting myself (and hubby) down...

Hopecontinues profile image
Hopecontinues

So sorry to hear your news. I remember this moment, I couldn't stop crying, so massive virtual hug from me. Be kind to yourself and let yourself grieve first of all and then plan your next move.

It is possible to get pregnant at 43, but you have to be prepared to do many rounds, as the chances are much lower with your own eggs. Many people on here have switched to donor and can talk to you about that when you're ready - if that's what you decide. Me included.

Big hugs ❤

PPea profile image
PPea in reply to Hopecontinues

Thank you 🤍 I know it's possible to get pregnant at 43, maybe just difficult. The real issue here is that I can have maybe one more try and that's it...so really have to think about my next steps are

Hopecontinues profile image
Hopecontinues in reply to PPea

Where are you doing the one more try? There are good clinics in Greece and other places who will do multiple egg collection deals. Might be worth asking on here if people can private message you details.

PPea profile image
PPea in reply to Hopecontinues

I'm based in Portugal/Lisbon and my doctor, who has always been my gynecologist is a fertility specialist, so I'm sticking with him and the clinic he does the procedures.

MariaHdz profile image
MariaHdz

Not naive at all. I started this 5 years ago. I was 30. Supossedly my case was very easy. They thought IUI would work, and I somehow translated thay to "it will work the first time... and they will be twins because I have 2 eggs", in fact I was nervous because "it was gonna work so quickly and maybe I was not ready, and vwry possible twins!". 2 medicated cycles, 6 iui, 2 different clinics, 2 endocrinologists and 5 FET by IVF later, i got my first positive.I send you a hug, this is a difficult thing and it never goes as we think it will or as it should. I hope thay any decision you take, is the best for you and your family

PPea profile image
PPea in reply to MariaHdz

Thank you MariaHdz 🤍 it's a struggle...

Happy2022 profile image
Happy2022

Hi there,

So sorry to hear it may not have worked for you this time.

I completely understand how you feel thinking it would work the first time, I too had my first IVF last year at 44 and everyone was so positive about it especially the clinic because my AMH result was amazing for my age and all other hormones etc looked great and then I got 18 eggs and the nurses clapped because it was so good at my age. I got totally carried along with the positivity and was crushed when it didn’t work. It was a big eye opener for me.

I considered trying again with my own eggs and was told again it could work but I decided to go along to the fertility show and use the opportunity to speak to several consultants across different clinics to get their view and the resounding view was I was wasting my money if I continued to pursue with my own eggs as yes I could get a normal one but that it was like looking for a needle in a haystack. They all suggested I try donor eggs instead as my chances went up enormously.

After much consideration I did go down the donor egg route and am currently 10 weeks pregnant from the first try.

I wanted to share my story to say you’re not alone and I think it’s common to get carried away by the positivity which doesn’t often reflect the actual chances of success.

Wishing you lots of luck and sending hugs xx

PPea profile image
PPea in reply to Happy2022

Thank you Happy2022 🤍 Very happy for you, congratulations! I think I am going the donor route also...let's see what the future brings

Happy2022 profile image
Happy2022 in reply to PPea

Thank you 😊

Please feel free to message me privately if you want to know anything on the process for donor eggs.

Wishing you lots of luck xx

Summertime12 profile image
Summertime12

So sorry to hear this. I feel your pain. We had so many rounds of IVF and finally it worked after 10 years plus. If you feel time and money is not on your side and you're willing to give it one more try then go for donor eggs.

PPea profile image
PPea in reply to Summertime12

Thank you Summertime12 🤍 that's probably what we will do

Missionofendo profile image
Missionofendo

Hello There, me too was supposed to test 26th but had cramps Sunday 4am and some twinges since. Called clinic told me test yesterday got a negative.

I’m gutted don’t know which way to turn to next can’t really decide. Heads not clear.

I’m 45 lost my pregnancy in Nov 2021 as my baby boy was too poorly to make it so termination for medication reasons. Heart breaking.

This bumpy journey is so hard I totally understand how you are feeling today and tomorrow and just want to send my love.

No one really understands unless they have been thru it too.

Rant away, cry when you need to this is grief and it will get easier the shock will wear off and you will smile again.

Until then be kind so comforting things and rest it’s exhausting.

Bless you I’m rooting for you x

Claire x

PPea profile image
PPea in reply to Missionofendo

Dear Claire, so sorry for you too. As you say, it's exhausting and draining... Everything is kind of a blur right now... I'm rooting for you too 🤍🍀

Missionofendo profile image
Missionofendo in reply to PPea

Thanks 🙏 x

Leii9 profile image
Leii9

Sending hugs, i got my negative blood test result from my FET last Friday :( This was my 4th transfer, im 41.

Stay positive, hugs xxx

Anim88 profile image
Anim88

So sorry you're going through this... I did recently as well. Sending much love during this time

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