Juggling work and IVF

[Sam_14]

Hi All,

I've had one round of IVF to freeze embryos and it was not as successful as we had hoped. The doctor and embryologist were left scratching their heads as despite good quality eggs and sperm, we only ended up with one usable embryo.

I struggled juggling the emotional side of the cycle with a highly stressful job. The doctor also advised that high stress levels could well have impacted the cycle.

We are getting ready for our next round and I'm keen to hear how others coped with juggling work and IVF stress.

Thank you,

Sam

[XOXO13]

Hello,

so sorry your first cycle didn’t go too well.

Personally for me, I found working alongside going through IVF too stressful. I work typically long hours, constant meetings and lots of deadlines and I felt I couldn’t give 100% to both my job and IVF.

So, for my first two transfers, I used holiday around egg collection and transfers and then for my third, I took a month unpaid leave.

By the time my fourth came around, I was actually in a better place mentally but work was chaos and my protocol for my second cycle was so intense… I tried to talk to work about reducing my workload but it never happened and I was working silly hours, so I made the decision to take sick leave with my GPs support. It was the best thing I did because I was able rest and just slow my mind down a bit.

Everyone is different though. Others find working a great distraction, but I think it really depends on your relationship with your job and how you handle stress as a person. I can very easily put on a brave face, but I’ll be crumbling inside and that affects my mental health and my physical health, so me it was the right decision to take a step back from work.

Best of luck to you and whatever decision you make xx

[Sam_14 in reply to XOXO13]

Thank you x

[Kiri23]

Hi Sam, looking back on my cycles, my advice is to tell your work if you can. They can be really understanding, provide you with the flexibility you require and will keep it confidential to a need to know basis. I’m going to be telling my manager soon and I think that will make things easier for me as I don’t need to worry about going to appointments etc. I’m also planning on taking some days off and asking my husband to help out more so I can try and be as stress free as possible (not easy I know as your mind can run away). I think some people try other things like acupuncture which I’m thinking of looking into. Wishing you lots and lots of luck. X

[Sam_14 in reply to Kiri23]

Thank You x

[Emilye92x]

Hey 🥰

Sorry to hear it wasn’t as successful as you’d hoped!

I knew from the get go I wouldn’t do well working alongside IVF - I’m a nurse working long shifts and rarely get full/any 😂 breaks!

I told my manager from the start I would trial working for the first week of my treatment and if it was awful then I’d get signed off by the GP and she was completely supportive of that. Obviously work was total hell and I ended up being signed off for the whole of my cycle plus another week to deal with the emotional side of a chemical pregnancy

I’m currently in the 2WW for my FET and as soon as I had the dates told my manager I wouldn’t be in until we have the results and she again was totally supportive.

If I were you I would be totally transparent with your manager and see how they are they might surprise you! Your GP will sign you off regardless, it was definitely worth the piece of mind for me. I did initially feel really guilty but soon realised that no one is going to thank you for it and pay for another cycle for working those few weeks

Best of luck with whatever you decide 💕 xx

[Sam_14 in reply to Emilye92x]

Thank You x

[Emma672]

Hi Sam. I have a really stressful job as a solicitor (with a team beneath me) and quite honestly it was bloody hard working alongside each cycle (as well as the run up to it and dealing with the emotional effects afterwards). I’m lucky in that my head of department is a close friend so I was able to be completely honest with her and she was so supportive, and also have a couple of good friends in the team who I was able to dump work on at the last minute, for example when my egg collection was a week earlier than expected on my second cycle. I do think that if you can tell your work it will take some of the stress off you, even if only your direct manager or just HR. Good luck x

[Sam_14 in reply to Emma672]

Thank You x

[HollyT7]

the doctors flyaway comment seems harsh. ivf is highly stressful for anyone and still works for a majority so please don't attach any blame to yourself for the round not working well.

I worked through our first fresh transfer, had some annual leave and signed off for some of our frozen and got signed off for our third. I felt like a fraud speaking with my Gp but they were more than understanding. Its a lot to deal with by itself let alone with everyday life and work. Best thing I did was sign off, watch Netflix and have time to myself xx

[Sam_14 in reply to HollyT7]

Thank You x

[Hidden]

I have a stressful job and have worked through all my IVF cycles and miscarriages and never told work what was going on (it’s a bit of a boys club and work impact my career) I was told the opposite - that stress didn’t have a proportional affect on outcomes. I also needed to weigh up the stress of not being at work - the out of control, the worry about whether stuff was being done (it wouldn’t be), the stress of going back and worked being piled up, and the stress of not having stuff to take my mind off ivf and just stressing about whether it worked or not! I decieee working was probably easier!

I think it depends on your job and if you can just package stuff up and other people completely take control or if the reality is it will just cause you more worry. Heaps of luck whatever you choose x

[Sam_14 in reply to Hidden]

Thank You x

[Midsummer_daydream]

I was struggling with the intensive scan schedule and appointments too but I’m lucky my work is close to my clinic. I haven’t told anyone at work about 2 IVF rounds. Honestly I would have gone mental and symptom spotting if I were just at home thinking about my body and how did I feel during 2WW so work took my mind off it. The day went quick and I carried on. I also have a highly stressful job, meeting people daily and moving around non stop. I just took my time and set my mind what is the priority right now.. I think if you can take some days off around egg collection, transfer day that would certainly help space it out