Absolutely broken today after our 4th transfer result. It's also 4 months to the day from our surgery for our MMC in August (transfer #3) 😔 That bright white FRER stick is quite terrifying.
I think the next step is to take a look at immunes. I assume I don't need an ERA as we did achieve implantation last time (?) but I do have a family history of autoimmune disorders. We have two day 6 embryos left from this batch but my mind cannot comprehend how we've already been through 4 decent quality blasts - I feel v v useless right now.
Does anyone have any suggestions or good news stories for transfers #5 and up?
I also feel weirdly tied to my clinic as we have Access Fertility funding but I think I need to come prepped with suggestions at our follow up and see what they say (or just go get the tests done myself?!). Unfortunately I can't get an appointment until 25 Jan but I'm going to try chase for a cancellation slot!
I hope there are some Christmas miracle stories to come though as I think there were a few of us in the tww ✨❤️🍀
H
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Hoop123
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Hi lovely, I’m so sorry to hear this. It’s so heartbreaking 💔 You’re absolutely right, those blank FRERs are horrendous.
I had 5 x FETs that failed before we tried immune testing. Turns out I had high NK cells and was prescribed 20mg prednisolone for my 6th transfer (I also had 1 intralipid infusion before transfer) and it worked! First and only positive test. I also had the ERA done but that was because I’d never had implantation.
Both my parents have psoriasis which is auto immune so I do think that had some impact.
Hope you’re holding up ok and are able to enjoy your Christmas break 🎄 and come back stronger in the new year with a good plan ahead xxx
Thank you Millbanks. It's totally heartbreaking - such a horrible heavy feeling 💔 I wanted to throw that FRER down the hallway hah.
Your story really gives me hope (although I am incredibly sorry you had to go through it). Did you test intra uterine NK cells or just through a blood test? I'm tempted to just push for a low dose prescription anyway and see what they say.
The enforced break over Christmas should do me some good and I've started tentatively making my plan for my next steps. I have also booked in with a fertility nutritionist for a bit of a reset in January, too, as it's been a helluva year of hormones, supplements, and all sorts. This at least helps me feel like I'm getting back a bit of control!
I hope you are doing well and that you have a magical Christmas break! 🎄✨ Thanks again for the support xx
I only did the bloods, I didn’t fancy another biopsy after the ERA - and actually my consultant said the bloods were more reliable (although I think it’s 50/50 opinion wise with different clinics).
I would definitely push for steroids if you can - although the blood test will ensure that you get the right amount. I was really keen to try it even before I’d had the bloods done after seeing so many lovely ladies on here have success after. That hope was all I needed really.
I think a break is always a good idea. I pushed through so many cycles back to back and it took its toll. Some lovely food and wine over Christmas should hopefully lift your spirits and having a plan for your next transfer will be good too.
Thank you - all good here thanks. Just trying not to get covid really 🤦🏼♀️
Oh nooooo... I'm so sorry to read this update. I reckon I'll be joining you tomorrow as we got a very unmistakable BFN at 8dp5dt and I'll eat my hat if this changes by day 11 (tomorrow). It's a wretched bloody business (literally bloody, following a failure, to add insult to injury!). There aren't enough words in the English language (not polite ones, anyway) to explain how much I despise those stark blank ****ing tests!! If I had the option it'd be blood tests all the way, always. It just isn't fair. Sorry, I'm having a day of rage today where I just don't understand why we all have to go through this. I don't know any of you in real life but I am certain that everyone who shares these sad updates 100% deserves to be a parent. We dedicate our lives and hearts and souls to this dream. Really heartbreaking. Sending you lots of love over Christmas and praying that the pain and disappointment lessen as the days pass. I'm definitely going to look at immune testing as something must be going wrong to lead to blank tests month after month, year after year. It's so hard though as so many doctors don't even believe in these tests, the HFEA doesn't endorse anything, it all costs so much money, is painful and invasive, more and more time out to do all the testing... and you also hear of people not really changing things but suddenly hitting the jackpot on their 6th, 7th, 8th transfer. Makes me recall my weekly wish that I had a crystal ball... 😘 xx
I really really hope you aren't joining me but we are here for you if it's not the result you're looking for 💔💔
I completely agree, it's just such a horrendous process and it's so unfair. Other people seem to just blink and have multiple kids and for some reason we are all here trying so ridiculously hard just to have the chance to have one. It takes over everything and I really feel left behind and like I'm losing a part of myself in the process. Hopefully the pain starts to ease... Picking out a delicious red wine for Christmas Day is helpful, hah. It's one of those crazy situations where time both heals and hurts. Yes, the pain numbs over time but each month we're just another month further away from everything. ****ing cruel really!
Agree with you on immune testing. I think I'm going to see if my consultant will just prescribe me low dose steroids to begin with but we'll see. It seems to be the key to so many people are repeat failed transfers ?! I would LOVE someone to definitively tell me what's wrong, what to do to help, and a crystal ball would be great!
Hiya, not my success story as I’ve only done one (failed) fresh transfer so far but a good friend of mine has a 5 yr old from her fifth round. She’s been incredibly helpful for me in helping me view this as an overall journey with one single end goal rather than individual journeys with each round. That being said, it was hard to keep in mind with my BFN this weekend but I’m trying to stay positive with the mantra of ‘it only takes one’. Sending lots of best wishes your way xx
Thank you for sharing, that does help to hear. I also think that's a really good way of looking at it - you have a wise friend.
I'm so sorry aboutyour recent BFN 😔 Sending you lots of hugs. It will get easier to start thinking positively as you start prepping for your next steps. It really does only take one! I hope we both find that one soon ❤️x
Thanks Littlepea. It's a good reminder to make sure I take some time to look after myself these holidays and hold onto some hope ❤️ Congrats again on your 3 embryos! Such lovely news ✨xx
Sorry to read this Hoop. Those BFNs are so bloody painful, makes my stomach lurch just thinking about them.
I think immune testing would be a good idea, as the other ladies have suggested. I had this done after 3 failed transfers. It has taken time and been a frustrating wait, but has highlighted issues and things to try on the next go. It is good to feel like we are trying new things and have hope that this might work one day 🤞
In the meantime, enjoy Christmas! It is great you have some frozen embies waiting for you for when you are ready to try again. Really hope we all get our miracles one day soon xx
Oh no! I feel like everyone on here has had a BFN this Christmas. I'm so sorry. How utterly frustrating and disappointing for you. I really hope you manage to sort out immune testing soon and that proves to be the missing puzzle piece. Sending hugs xxx
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Over 40yrs 4th transfer 3dpt
4th DE transfer fail, heartbroken 💔 
14 days post 3 day transfer = BFN
