Hello everyone, So today was official test day and sadly for us this journey has come to an end. Today, there is a part of me that wants to give up on this cruel rollercoaster of a ride that I never wanted to sign up to in the first place. We are sad but I know the grief will pass and when it does, I’ll come out fighting ready to move onto donor eggs. After testing this morning I wanted to crawl back into bed and sob my eyes out and just cocoon myself for the rest of the day. Instead, we went for an 8 mile hike in the sun across a beautiful range of mountains. There was just us, nobody else in sight apart from a few mountain goats. It was the peace we needed to think through all our thoughts. We must focus on the positives, we still have each other and a week left of this beautiful holiday. Thank goodness we don’t have to function at work this week as I know we’d be more than hopeless.
I want to thank you all for the amazing support you have given me during this last year. I would never have had the strength if it wasn’t for you guys cheering me from the sidelines and putting a smile back on my face on the days I thought I may never smile again. You are all truly beautiful people.
Thank you Xx
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jengi
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I am very sorry to read this. Don't have words to express. Sorry.
Im really sorry for your BFN, they never get any easier! You gave it your all and that's the best we can do! Sounds like youve done the best thing and gotten out to clear the head. It maybe doesnt lessen the pain but Im glad you have found some positives in just being with each other! Big hugs lovely!xx
oh hon,that's such a shame. You've got a great attitude and I'm sure after a while to make peace with it you'll be back stronger than ever. Keep your chin up xxx
Thanks lovely, it’ll take time to deal with it but we are in the best place to do that right now. Sunshine seems to make everything seem a bit better ☀️ Xx
Hi lovely, I'm so sorry to hear this the cycle went so well I was really crossing my fingers for you.
I'm in exactly the same place. You /we have given it our all. Its flipping exhausting and tough.
I'm taking time now, I've actually been enjoying stepping off the roller-coaster and reengaging with life and bits of myself which I had lost. It's been so tough. I'm going to take some time and maybe get my head around donor eggs, but my partner isn't keen on that. So I don't know what will happen.
I wish you so much love and strength. Well done, it sounds like you have a great partner and a brilliant attitude. I'm sure you'll get your rainbow baby one day. Much love xxx
Exhausting..... is an understatement! Wishing you all the best with the next step of your journey. In the meantime, enjoy having the time off the rollercoaster! It’s taken us a year to get our heads around donor eggs. We had implications counselling which was the breakthrough for us. Xx
Oh Jengi, I am so sorry to read this. So glad you have been able to spend the day in the way that you have. Hopefully you will be able to take time to heal, regroup and move forward again soon xx
Devastating news...really sorry to hear. Glad your away with peace from people, life and work to let you both get your head around things. Take good care of yourself and husband.xx
Bfns are so hard. It sounds like you are being so positive, getting out today was a good move, even better that you were both able to reflect by yourselves. Good luck with your donor cycle whenever you’re ready xx
Awh lovely, I’m so sorry to hear you got a BFN too. It’s bloody devastating. I wished & hoped so hard for that BFP. You take care of yourself & other half and together you’ll be ready to continue the journey. I’ll keep an eye out for your posts. Sending strength & positivity Xx
So sorry to read this jengi- life is so unfair. Enjoy your time together away from it all and hopefully the time you have away will help you both come to terms with the result xxx
Hunny I’m so sorry to read this but I really admire your attitude, you must be unbelievably strong (although at this very moment it mustn’t feel that way) I hope you can both enjoy the rest of your holiday spending time together just the two of you, sending much love x x x
Those words are so cold and cruel to read. There’s nothing wrong in needing to cry or have a lazy day! You did very well going out and about, but glad you were together.
Ohh im so so sorry 😭 I was keeping all my fingers crossed for youu...Life can be so cruel sometimes... There are no words that would make you feel bettter.. Just spend some nice time with your husband and keep your head up things will get better... Sending you millions kisses and hugs hun ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
I've had a few failed cycles and to see no line or not pregnant is devastating
I hope that what I say now doesn't upset you as I don't want to confuse you but I just wanted to ask if you have only used the clear blue test?/
I only ask as they are nowhere near as sensitive as the first response tests and although by 14dp5dt you would likely get an accurate result it has often been the case that through ivf we implant later or your hcg levels are just a little lower atm.
Maybe you could do another test in a couple days to be sure before you stop ivf meds? Or your clinic can do blood tests as they are more sensitive?
But it sounds like you have a positive and strong mindset and I'm sure this will carry you through - I'm glad you have each other to get you through this
I'm so very sorry to hear this. Glad you and hubby are away and not stuck at work at a time like this. Be kind to yourselves while you grieve through this. Big hugs xxx
It’s strangely reassuring that you ladies understand the pain & grieve. Wishing you lots of luck with the next stages of your journey 🤞🏻Xx
Sorry to hear this jengi. Think it will be me in the same boat tomorrow. 12dp5dt tomorrow but still testing negative so I'm expecting it. Take care of yourselves.x
So sorry to hear this. I had BFN yesterday and i was disappointed and cried for couple of hours. In the afternoon i also went for walk with my OH and I felt better. Went back to work today as I thought the show must go on and for me not to think about it and move on quickly. Thinking of you my dear xxx
I’m sad to read you had a negative result too. Well done you for soldering on and getting back to work. I hope it’s helping to take your mind off it. Best of luck with your next steps. Hugs to you Xx
Awww I'm so sorry to read this Jengi! Thoughts are with you both. It's such a horrible up and down journey and I hope you get a positive end really soon lovely. Take care of yourselves ❤❤
Oh no. I’m so sorry to hear your news. Glad you still got out and had a nice day. You’re strong and resilient. It just sucks that you’ve got to be. Take the time you need and come back refreshed and ready when you want.xx
Sorry to hear this! Sending you all the love I have and praying that you get your happy ending!! Take time to relax and deal with things! I know how hard bfn are and how draining they are! Take it easy xxx
They are draining and exhausting but they do show us how strong & resilient we are too! It’s important for me to have the time to deal with it otherwise I just bottle it up. In the long run that’s no use. One step at a time! Xx
So incredibly sorry to hear this. It’s so unfair and crazy this journey and you’ve been such a warrior woman! Sending prayers and hugs. Whichever way your path goes, you’ll be ok xxx
I’m really sorry to hear this news. Time is our only friend to process emotions, not that it ever feels easy. I hope you and your partner can gain strength over time and can then consider your options and what you want for the future. Warm wishes with you now x
I'm so sorry to hear this jengi, it is so hard. Thinking of you both.
My acupuncturist told me 'you will get there, everyone just has a different journey'. She's a very direct lady who doesn't mince her words so I always remind myself of that when i'm having a wobble xx
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