We are going ahead 💪 regardless… praying for another miracle 🙏

[Faith103]

Hi All,

Hope all is well.

Me and my partner have had a long conversation and we have decided to go ahead with frozen transfer on my next cycle regardless of the advice given.

I have been told I have a blocked Fallopian tube and this can make chances of successful implantation more difficult as well as higher chance of ectopic pregnancy if successful. We have been informed with a blocked tube this can cause liquid to spill into the womb and prevent implantation. However they can’t confirm if this is actually happening or not.

We have not come to this conclusion because we think the experts are taking rubbish but more on an agreement that this is all a game of chance no matter what way we look at it. Ivf is chance regardless. We have been advised because I have a blocked Fallopian tube I should get this clipped shut but given the circumstances of this not being high importance on the NHS list we could be waiting years. By this point my endometriosis will be excessively worse as it has progressed massively in the 8 months after having my son. I need to give my body a rest on contraception at some point to try and slow the endo down. We enquired private for the procedure but they want £5000 which we are not willing to pay, so we have decided to do a transfer regardless and take a chance on one of our embabys and in the meantime I have put myself on the NHS waiting list. If this ivf doesn’t succeed we will maybe try one more time and then go ahead with the procedure once we get to the top of the NHS list.

I do think in life we have to take risks, if we didn’t take risks we wouldn’t move in life. I’m prepared for what might happen.

I’m scared, excited and worried but I have to go for it.! I am at university so hoping this will keep me busy. Also I have my baby boy miracle by my side to keep me going💪

Roll on NOVEMBER we are ready! 🙏💪 xxx

[Fudge1980]

Good luck 🤞🏼 we are doing a fet next month! I’ve just had to make a hard decision too I went for a baseline scan and found a cyst so big it filled my abdomen. We were told it needed dealing with but the waiting time was ridiculous so we did pay private to have it drained as a “quick fix” so we can go ahead with our transfer. No doubt it will refill and I will need surgery to remove it but time is precious right now for ivf being in my 40’s. Loads of luck this cycle 🍀

[Faith103 in reply to Fudge1980]

Good luck 🤞 🍀 to you too!

Sorry to hear this and I wish you all the success for your transfer.

It’s so difficult when these decisions come along but we have to keep going.

We have paid so much money on our ivf cycle already getting the eggs out, the freezer storage, the medication for the transfer, the list goes on as you know. I can not pay out another £5000 when I’ve already spent so much. I would rather use that towards another egg collection if I need it in the future.

Keep me updated on your process 😃 best of luck xxx 🙏

[MrsOrangejuice]

I know the feeling and it's not fun making those decisions but great you're excited. We were told to cancel our egg collection as 'something was very wrong' because I had one follicle where they expected a lot and was told not to waste our funding or put myself at risk with a cyst. We'd had a similar previous round where we'd got eggs in the end so we opted to continue - got 5 eggs and all made it to blast. Then for the FET I was told to cancel because my lining had gone uneven in one place and could be a polyp (or worse). But they couldn't say for sure, I'd never had that before and it wasn't there a few days before. I asked if it could just be I'd had too much oestrogen (i'd said initially I didn't want it at all as lining's always fine and i over respond to it). They shrugged and said maybe but 'embryos are so precious'. The suggestion was to stop, have more (very costly) investigations and restart when all that came back clear, which could have been months privately or years in the NHS. I've already had every investigation because of endometriosis and there didn't seem enough evidence for me to stop and repeat everything. So I just dropped the oestrogen and said carry on. The nurses and doctors made me feel terrible and like an awful person who was taking risks with precious life. One nurse even took me aside and talked about 'one in a million' odds. I really didn't need that at that point when it was clear which was I was thinking of going. I don't advocate going against medical advice generally and I know they've got our best interests, but there was zero ability to depart from their typical pathway and no consideration of individual responses or circumstances, and I was really upset by the way they made me feel. My husband and I sat down and really considered the options and then I think just went with what felt right, knowing it was a risk. But we'd just had two chemicals when everything was 'perfect' so that changed our views on chances.

Anyway, this is all a moan and water under the bridge because that FET worked immediately and I got a BFP at 3dp5dt! Now 13 weeks. I know it could all have been the wrong decision and I really did not enjoy the guilt of feeling reckless, or the financial consequences, but what was important for us was we were ok with our decision. For some reason I felt happier and more confident with the FET than at any other point in the treatment.

I really hope you have a good outcome and personally I think your bravery and optimism in the face of what you've been through is fantastic. Best of luck! 🍀

[Kbear83]

Hello Faith,

I totally agree with you and your husband taking your own chances. At some point this had to happen. As mrsorangejuice said we know they have our best interests at heart but I believe they err on the side of caution so much that they ignore the positive chances that are still present in our situations.

I'm having my first ever transfer on Monday after being in the ivf system for 2 years. We've had about 8 or 9 cycles cancelled for various reasons and at various points. This time we have a small polyp and the advice was ideally not to go ahead just incase the embryo implants at that point, however there is also a large surface area which the embryo is going to be placed that it could be perfect. We have gone with every piece of advice up to this point often against our own thoughts and feelings but we've just had enough.

They've agreed for us to go ahead as ultimately they are our embryos and it's our money, and our decision to take the chance.

You are so right about it being a game of chance and we're all prepared for it not to work, but not even getting to the point to try is worse.

I wish you so much luck and support, you've taken control of your situation, don't let anyone make you feel bad or doubt your decisions.

All the best

Kelly