Feeling hopeless with poor response

[NemoFish]

I had another scan today (day 10 of stims), and I still only have three follicles. 1x20mm, 1x15mm and 1x11mm. My ovaleap dose was bumped up from 225 to 300iu a couple of days ago. My AMH is 11, and I’m 35. I feel gutted, it’s my first cycle and I was naively thinking I would respond better than this. My clinic has said they will go ahead with EC next Wednesday, but that the outlook wasn’t good.

I know it only takes one egg, but I feel like my chances of even getting that one egg are very slim right now, and that this cycle is over before it’s even begun. I can’t help wonder if it’s my fault, or I could’ve done something different. My boyfriend isn’t particularly upset by it, his answer is oh well we’ll just do it again, but he already has kids and it’s not his life savings being put towards it. I really just feel so deflated. Down reg was complete hell, and the thought of going through it again scares me 😢 x

[Gemstar20]

Hi Nemo fish, your follicles are a good size , check out my page for my stories I understand how you feel. ( hopefully this will change your mindset a bit about follicle sizes) xx

[NemoFish in reply to Gemstar20]

I read your posts and it’s definitely help to remind me this isn’t over, thank you x

[DianeArnold]

Hi Nemofish. Those follicles are good sizes, so should yield some decent eggs. Hopefully things will turn out better than you are thinking, and if not, then they will have learned much about how you are responding to the medication. Thinking of you. Diane

[NemoFish in reply to DianeArnold]

Thank you x

[AuroraXen]

Hi NemoFish, I know it's hard to go into egg collection when you're feeling so disappointed. In truth, I'm not very hopeful for my prospects next week either (doing EC monday morning). In fact, when the nurse was talking about embryo transfers I actually laughed out loud 🙊as I can't see us getting there this time. BUT I'm going to try to sort myself out and draw out some positivity 💪I think it's a self-preservation mechanism... I was very very down on Wed after such a poor scan, so to try to cushion any nasty shocks next week, I think my subconscious is trying to prepare me for a 'no eggs or one rubbish egg' result Monday, so as not to have my hopes smashed again! Your little follicle might develop yet, you've got a little while to go 🤞I completely understand why you're feeling so low though. You have a pretty good AMH I think (waaaay better than mine 😆😆) and you're a good bit younger so every chance your eggs will be great xx

[NemoFish in reply to AuroraXen]

I really admire your positivity! I find it easier to just accept defeat before the race is even finished, I’m very much a glass half empty person. I’ve got everything crossed for you on Monday, I really hope it goes well for you xx

[AuroraXen in reply to NemoFish]

Thanks NemoFish. I'll keep you posted! It's horribly hard. If a cycle was a few hundred quid, ok, you wouldn't feel so bad about one being 'wasted', or essentially being a test, but the costs involved are just so huge... I think it's always a shock when you get going with IVF as sadly, so many of us find out just how many things can go wrong or turn out to be a disappointment. It's like the grand national, with a whole bunch of fences and hurdles and streams to jump and cross and personally, I had NO idea my first time of all the things that need to work to get the outcome we all dream of. So I think it's very normal for you to feel down - especially if you had a bad time down-regging, poor thing 😘 Try to take hope from some of the stories on here: other women in your situation (and indeed, in worse situations) have had success, so no reason it shouldn't be you this time. Sending hugs xx

[NemoFish in reply to AuroraXen]

Thank you, you’re so kind. I’ve screenshotted your reply to look back at when I need picking back up this weekend. Please let me know how Monday goes, I’ll be thinking of you x

[Chiefy]

I had 4 follicles at day 10 scan and was so disappointed. You hear of so many people with 15+ eggs collected I just assumed the whole cycle was a failure. On the day they managed to get 7 eggs, 6 fertilised, 5 got to blastocyst and I am pregnant from the fresh transfer, so it just goes to show that it is quality over quantity.

Everything crossed for you ladies with low follicle numbers x

[NemoFish in reply to Chiefy]

I really needed to read this! Thank you and congratulations!! X

[Chiefy in reply to NemoFish]

Wishing you all the best for Wednesday. Just try and stay hopeful x

[NemoFish in reply to Chiefy]

Thank you x

[Catlady12345]

Hey! I also had my scan and only had 4 follicles, I was also devastated but went ahead with egg collection and they managed to get 10! We ended up with 4 blasts, sadly no success yet but still, try not to be too downhearted with numbers at this stage xx

[NemoFish in reply to Catlady12345]

Wow ten! Did you just get some last minute growers? X

[Catlady12345 in reply to NemoFish]

Yep! Little guys just needed a couple of extra days cooking I think 🤣 good luck xx