IVF beginners

[Bluedestiny]

Hi everyone I am new here, but of background I have been with my husband for 11 years and we married 2 years ago, neither of us have any children. Cut story short we’ve been unsuccessful my trying for a baby for a long time and have been referred for fertility we had a telephone appointment with the fertility hub yesterday and they have very quickly booked us in to go in on Monday next week. I’ve already had blood tests for progesterone my husband has done sperm samples. I just really wanted to say hello and see if anyone can give me an idea of what to expect from here I’m torn between over researching and not reading too much to stop myself going insane. The doctor yesterday basically said you need to go for ivf let’s get on with it. I am 33 and my husband 36. Thank you to anyone with any advice.

[btow]

Hey! I can’t be of any use information wise but I’ve just found this forum and I’m in a similar situation to you. Married for almost 10 years now, both 30 years old. We’ve been struggling all this time and last year decided to do something about it as I was getting really down and frustrated with it and it and to be honest it had started to affect our relationship. We’ve been through numerous investigations (scans, blood tests, samples etc) and our last phone call was to confirm IVF would be the best route for us. Currently waiting to find out more information about the process and get the ball rolling. We’re not sure whether to be more excited, scared, or nervous (currently all 3!) but hoping to learn more here

[Bluedestiny in reply to btow]

I feel exactly the same it’s a definite rollercoaster of emotions, I was happy after our appointment the doctor was great and really helpful. I know we only need to wait a week to know more but now I’m worrying about what’s after that. Also have you told people you know about it? I hadn’t told anyone until yesterday I just thought I’d get it out there, then I get irritated by the responses, they can’t win with me at the minute 😂 everyone is supportive though I’m just not sure that people understand x

[btow in reply to Bluedestiny]

The waiting is hard isn’t it! It already feels never ending and I’m sure there’s lots more to come! It’s been almost a year since we were referred onto the fertility unit by our doctor, then COVID hit and everything slowed down. My last appointment was In September and we went through more blood tests, BMI etc. My BMI was fine at the time but I’m so bothered now incase they call me in for another check as my BMI has definitely increased during lockdown haha 😳 I’ve done tons of online research and watched a bunch of YouTube videos (sort of IVF vlogs) so I feel okay-ish going into it now that I know a bit more.

So far we’ve only told my mum and best friend, they’ve both been so supportive. We’re hesitant to tell anyone else just yet as we don’t want a ton of questions or irritating responses like you said 😅 but we plan to tell the rest of our family once we’ve actually started the process fully. I do think it’s a hard thing for people who aren’t going through infertility to understand, do you often get the ‘when are you having children?’ Question too? I’m constantly seeing people posting their scan pictures and pregnancy announcements and every one is like a kick in the gut.

I hope this next week flies by for you, do keep us updated! Could you imagine, if all goes well, this time next year could be a totally new experience for us! 🥰x

[Nat246]

Hi bluedestiny. What to expect .... a lot of waiting generally! But once your treatment starts, it does happen quickly. I would recommend you keep your own record of everything you have done/what happens at appts/your results. I am assuming you are with NHS.... if later on you did go private you can use test results from NHS rather than pay to retest (if within a certain time period). I found the podcast big fat negative very informative and fertility network have great support meetings (all online at the moment). It can be very lonely as people don’t understand if they haven’t experienced it and can be very insensitive with comments so some good support is important . Best of luck x

[Bluedestiny in reply to Nat246]

This is really helpful information thank you I will make sure to diary everything that happens. I’m grateful that they have got us in so very quickly I only went to my doctor in November so they have been brilliant. Yes we are nhs so thank you for the pointers I’m absolutely dreading all the waiting already and I know it’s only the very start. I wonder do you know how long it takes from these appointments to when anything will start? I know that might be how long is a piece of string question. Also I have no idea what all the abbreviations mean on here 😂 I need to swat up x

[Nat246 in reply to Bluedestiny]

Yes important to have your own records as one doctor might tell you something completely different to the last doctor and you’ll want to be very clear on what is actually correct. The wait does depend on your hospital. My NHS round from referral to starting treatment was one year (this was well before covid) but you can’t go on anyone else’s experience as all hospitals are different. But I guess it’s good to be prepared for the possibility of a long wait. Also the book ‘it starts with the egg’ is good and a lot of people swear by the changes they make after reading it. Many changes take three months to impact egg/sperm quality so worth reading and making changes now ready x