IVF Round 1 OTD - BFN 💔. Questions to ask in debrief?

[ILHB]

Official test day has arrived and it’s a BFN for me 😢. I thought it was going to be, but as my period hadn’t arrived there was a little bit of hope. Need to wait for two ‘normal’ cycles before we can try again. I’ve emailed the clinic our result and hoping they’ll be able to book us in soon for a debrief. I’ve started to think about questions to ask but would also welcome suggestions.

Thinking of and sending love to others who also had BFNs this Christmas, and to everyone still on this difficult journey.

You never realise how strong you are, until being strong is the only choice 💪🏻❤️ Xxx

[Frankie08]

So sorry to hear this hun. I have my OTD tomorrow and I don’t think it’s going to be good news for me either. Keep strong and i hope you get your BFP in the new year ❤️❤️❤️

[ILHB in reply to Frankie08]

Thank you ❤️. Good luck for tomorrow, I will be thinking of you 💫🙏🏼 Xxx

[Chicky86]

I'm so sorry to hear this, I too got my BFN this morning, and had been feeling crampy the last couple of days, so I kind of expected it.

Sending you lots of hugs 😘 xx

[ILHB in reply to Chicky86]

It’s so hard. Thinking of you ❤️. Sending a big hug and hope you have a nice, relaxing day planned 😘 Xxx

[Chicky86 in reply to ILHB]

Thank you. Selfishly grateful that the 5 day Christmas bubble got scrapped as I was supposed to be at my sister's 40th birthday party today, and instead I get to chill out doing absolutely nothing at all!!

Hope you also can try and have a relaxing day xx ❣️

[ILHB in reply to Chicky86]

That sounds like a good plan! I’m secretly glad that lockdown restrictions has meant limited socialising. I’m not sure I could handle it at the moment. Self care isn’t selfish ❤️ Xxx

[Ivfgotadream]

Sorry this round hasn’t worked out for you xThings to ask- what has the clinic learnt about how you react to medication - is there anything they’d change next time?

- talk through the results - numbers of eggs, number fertilised, quality on day 3 and then day 5? Do the results suggest anything ie poor egg quality or sperm issues?

- any additional testing required/recommended? X

[ILHB in reply to Ivfgotadream]

Thank you for taking the time to reply. That’s really helpful. I have made some extra notes XX

[FutureMommy]

So sorry you had gone through such a heart break. My heart goes out to you Xoxo... I was super positive since my transfer, until recently (today day 6dp5dt) because I don't feel any serious symptom yet.

[ILHB in reply to FutureMommy]

It’s so hard to stay positive. I don’t think everyone has symptoms though. Thinking of you and hope you get a positive result 💕 Xx

[Wishingaway]

So sorry to hear this honey, it’s such a tough journey to be on at the best of times isn’t it without the BFN 😔 I had a three day transfer on the 14th dec, everything seemed to be going well until Christmas Day and I started bleeding, very light to begin with, Boxing Day got a little heavier and then out the blue last night and this morning I am passing clots and have a real lot of pain, my official test date in 29th, I haven’t got long to go but I think I already know what the answer is. This is my 2nd ICSI cycle, I was extremely lucky with my first round and have a beautiful 6 year old. This was the only private round we could afford so it’s the end of the road for us, I still have the smallest bit of hope but I just don’t see how it could have worked now with all the bleeding I have had, I would have been due on my period, so I’m guessing it’s that. Sending a big hug your way. And hoping you get your dream soon xx

[ILHB in reply to Wishingaway]

Thank you for replying and sorry to hear that you are bleeding. Wishing you lots of luck for your test day. The waiting is so hard! Sending lots of love and a big hug abs hope your 6 year old is making you smile 💕 Xx

[jengi]

I’m so sorry it hasn’t worked this time. Two fertilised eggs is a good outcome with low AMH, well done to your ovaries! Take the time you need & when you are ready get a new plan in place with your team & give attempt 2 everything you’ve got! I notice they transferred at day 2, its worth understanding why? How did they divide after fertilisation? For me, this is where it was going wrong, the first cleave wasn’t very good, when it starts to go wrong this early on in the division process it’s not good news. I made a separate appointment with the embryologist to talk through what they were seeing, it was tough to hear but definitely worth it. See if that’s an option for you too. I also tried long protocol, you could ask about the pros and cons of this protocol. I know how heartbreaking low AMH is but there are always options so hang in there & listen to the advice of the experts, even though sometimes it’s hard to hear. Big hugs Xx

[ILHB in reply to jengi]

Thank you for your reply and supportive words. I think the division is where it went wrong for us too. They were initially aiming for a 3 day transfer as they rarely go 5 days in our clinic, when there aren’t many eggs. However, they split from 1 cell to 3 instead of 1 cell, 2 cell, 4 cell. I think I will ask when we debrief whether there is anything we can do to improve this for next time. Would this be due to the eggs or the sperm? I’m still quite new to this so I’m not sure. I will definitely ask about long protocol too.

I have just read your profile and can see that you are a fellow low AMHer. It is so hard when they are working with such low numbers. Congratulations on your pregnancy and hope you are feeling well. We are open to donor eggs in the future if it doesn’t work out with my own. I can see that you have a post on choosing donors which will be very helpful I’m sure 💕💫 Xxx