Feeling deflated and needing a boost ... - Fertility Network UK

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Feeling deflated and needing a boost of positivity!

Westielover16 profile image
15 Replies

So we are doing our 5th fresh cycle and this will be our last round due to the stress of 3 years of IVF wearing us down and the finances.

Previously we had always done short protocols as I have PCOS and ICSI as husband has DNA fragmentation. This has been our first long protocol go.

Overall felt much better in myself throughout the stimms and we were feeling on a high yesterday after our egg collection, as they got 29 eggs. Were finally feeling like maybe we found the right combination for us.

Got the call this morning from the clinic and unfortunately 15 were immature and only 5 fertilised normally. Feeling really low and anxious as at this stage previously we have always been in a much better position. For us our drop off in the past has always been between day 3-5 and normally we have maybe 2-3 embryos by day 5 and only ever had one to freeze.

I know 5 viable embryos is great and you only need one but just feeling really rocked by this rollercoaster.

Just needing some positive experiences to help me stay positive today.

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Westielover16 profile image
Westielover16
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15 Replies
jengi profile image
jengi

This is good news. Remember all it takes is one. Try keep yourself busy and your mind calm & positive. Easier said then done I know! But stressing and negative thoughts isn’t going to change the situation. Keeping everything crossed for you Xx

Westielover16 profile image
Westielover16 in reply to jengi

Thanks for your message and positivity!! Fingers crossed for the ones we have and going to try and keep busy this week. Xx

RhinoCat profile image
RhinoCat

Awh the drop off is a total nightmare, I actually think it doesn’t matter how many eggs ya get , seems only a couple of good ones ever make it 😘 try and focus on the fact that the dodgy ones have been naturally ruled out saving you a failed cycle and hope that whatever makes it is your best shot 🤩🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻💐💐💐💐💐💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖 total 🎢! Hold tight! You can do this 😘

Westielover16 profile image
Westielover16 in reply to RhinoCat

Thanks for your message and positive thoughts. I think you are right. In past cycles we had 15 fertilised but still only one make it to day 5 so is probably just luck in the end. Going to try and busy myself with a long dog walk and in the garden today as always makes me feel better. Xx

RhinoCat profile image
RhinoCat in reply to Westielover16

Sounds good 👌🏻 I’m going to make some face masks to distract myself and then hopefully my sisters who have flown home will be finished their online working from home stuff 🤩 have a blissfully distracted day 🤣😘😘😘😘😘💖💖💖💐💐💐💐

Westielover16 profile image
Westielover16 in reply to RhinoCat

Just saw that you’re on your 2ww too. Wishing you all the best and fingers crossed for you too!!!

RhinoCat profile image
RhinoCat in reply to Westielover16

Thanks pet 😘💐

hannahkc profile image
hannahkc

Hi Westielover,

The drop out rate is crushing, with 29, it's easy to have a false sense of security, so it's a shock to be down to single figures

Wishing you the best of luck, when is your day 5? Hope all 5 lil embryos make it there!🤞🤞

Westielover16 profile image
Westielover16 in reply to hannahkc

Hi Hannahkc,

Thanks for your reply! Just all part of the highes and lows, but very disappointing all the same.

Our day 5 will be Saturday so fingers crossed for this next hurdle 🤞 xx

Peony85 profile image
Peony85

Hi Westielover, just wanted to say I’m wishing you all the best for the next couple of days! As they say it only takes one and hopefully you’ve got a strong set of 5 in there. 🤞🤞

Westielover16 profile image
Westielover16 in reply to Peony85

Thanks for your message and just trying to keep busy and focused on being positive! Xx

Shirazlover2013 profile image
Shirazlover2013

👋 it is a huge rollercoaster of ups and downs! The embryology calls are the worst 😝 After egg collection you know you’ve done your very best and you have done a spectacular job creating those eggs! It’s a whole new ball game this protocol so anything could happen from here on. Until you know otherwise I’d try to stay on the side of hope that one of these strong little 5 becomes your miracle. Easier said than done and I know it’s impossible to leave behind the baggage of prior failed cycles and compare. But the hope is still there, these are new embryos and all are in the running!!

Just out of personal curiosity (so feel free to not answer) how did your oestrogen levels go on this protocol? Did they start to get high and you triggered early or were you able to trigger when you’d originally hoped to?

Wishing you buckets and buckets of luck for the next update 🤞🤞🤞 and sending positive thoughts your way xx

Westielover16 profile image
Westielover16 in reply to Shirazlover2013

Hi! Thanks for your message and positivity! Tried to just keep busy yesterday and feeling better today.

To answer your trigger question, we triggered on time but they did lower my stimms meds from pretty early on. So after my first scan/bloods they had me alternate my daily dose of Meroifert. Started on 150 daily but then dropped to 75 or 150 every other day. After this change all seemed okay re levels. Curious why you ask? Have you had a similar experience?

Xx

Laura3101 profile image
Laura3101

It’s definitely quality over quantity. On my 2nd round of ivf I got 24 eggs (I think or 25 I can’t quite remember) and by day 5 only 1 was good enough for transfer & 1 was able to freeze. That 1 fresh transfer resulted in my now 2 and half year old daughter so it can defo happen with what may seem like a big drop off rate. Our was always day 3-5 drop off too! Xx

Westielover16 profile image
Westielover16 in reply to Laura3101

Thanks so much for your message. Always helpful to hear about stories like yours! Fingers crossed that our journey this time is like yours. The drop off rate is definitely the worst part for us!

We have only ever had one clear BFP from our only FET from our 3rd cycle. Unfortunately this was a miscarriage at just under 6 weeks. That round we had 18 eggs and 16 made it to day 3 but then by day 5, we only had 1 for fresh transfer and one to freeze. So know it can happen.

Fingers crossed and just hoping this is still our miracle round.

Xx

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