Secondary infertility

[Bing84]

Hi all, new to the group. Feeling very inspired & comforted by reading your stories so thought I’d share my journey. Have a beautiful almost 3 year old conceived by surprise so naively though baby number 2 would be a breeze. How wrong we were. Husband been diagnosed with low sperm motility. Tried condensyl but not worked this cycle and I’ve booked initial consultation for private at Hewitt centre Liverpool. Has anyone any experience of this clinic?

I am blessed with our little girl but at that point where everyone seems to be pregnant with second and third. It is consuming me.

Good luck to you all & sending baby duet xx

[Miraclebabyno2]

Hi we are also suffering with second infertility but the issue with me is I appear to now have 2 blocked tubes. We are under the Hewitt family in Liverpool and so far my journey has been a good one. On our first consultation he decided that I would need the lap and dye and the other tests which he said they could do on the nhs which was great but obviously all other treatments are pricy. We opted to do a package with access fertility which was the multi cycle, we have done one cycle so far with 1 transfer which sadly ended in miscarriage but they have been great and offered support etc. I’m back there in a few weeks to discuss our next transfer. Good luck with your journey xx

[Bing84 in reply to Miraclebabyno2]

Thanks for replying, no one really seems to talk much about secondary infertility so it is comforting to know we’re not the only ones and there is help out there. If anyone asks me again when we are having another one I am afraid I might explode!

So sorry to hear of your MC and hoping your next try results in your miracle baby.

Also good to hear you would recommend Hewitt. Likewise they’ve been in able to fit our appt around the nhs tests but hopefully small price to pay in the long run!

Good luck with your journey xx

[Hidden in reply to Bing84]

One of my friends went through secondary infertility and did have a baby through ivf afterwards and went through a lot of upset as well being surrounded by growing families when that's what she desperately wanted for herself.

[Hidden]

Its normal to feel a little bit envious when someone else gets something you want for yourself as you only want the same for yourself.

I find although I am glad for them and wouldn't wish them harm I feel sorry for myself thinking when its going to be my turn?

Of course you are thankful for your little girl but it doesn't mean you can't grieve for what you dont have and its hard being surrounded by growing families when its something you desperately want for yourself.

Best of luck at the private clinic!

[Bing84 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for your kind and understanding words plus sharing your friend’s success story. I can relate to all of those things. It’s such a rollercoaster of emotions with the guilt, stress and frustration. But feeling a sense of relief at the moment as I know we have a plan but I know that it just the next part of our story and nothing is guaranteed in this life. So just trying to still make sure we are positive for our little girl. Thanks everyone xx

[Celloheggy]

Hey Bing84. We also have an almost 3 year old, who we had by ICSI on our first cycle. We had two frozen embryos left that we knew we’d use, and always hoped they would work. Sadly neither FET worked, and we’ve just done a rather disastrous round of IMSI. Hubby has always had sperm issues, but my low AMH has been the issue for this round.

I can’t believe we’ve done another cycle, we always said we’d be happy with one! She’s so kind with other children we’re now guilt ridden we can’t give her a sibling. Who knows we might even do a 3rd cycle 😬.

Most of the mummy friends we hang out with all have 2 kids now, no doubt some of them will be getting pregnant with number 3 soon. It’s very depressing, but hopefully we’ll all get there in the end 🤞🏻.

Wishing you lots of good luck xxxx

[Bing84]

Hi cellohiggy thanks for sharing your story. I feel the same in the way that our almost 3 year old is an absolute joy and know we are blessed to have them in our lives but it doesn’t stop the yearning. Sorry to hear this time has not worked out but it’s just finding the strength to stay positive and cling onto fact it has happened once more so it will happen again eventually. Best of luck with your continued journey. Hopefully 2020 will be our year to everyone in similar position xx

[Shirazlover2013]

Hi Bing84, it’s a strange position to be in isn’t it. My little boy turns 4 in a few days. We are so lucky to have him, I didn’t quite realise what a miracle he was at the time. But now oh my gosh I truly appreciate how lucky I am to have him. Having said that I am in despair at the thought that he may never have a sibling. One of the worst things is having 1 child brings you into daily contact with multiple child families whether it be the nursery drop off or the play ground, I feel like I can’t get away from them to give myself breathing space to deal with my feelings. Like you it consumes my thoughts all day every day. So many friends have had 2-3 babies in the time we’ve been trying for our family and there’s a few I can hardly think about without grimacing as they’ve announced a pregnancy during a very vulnerable or low point in my life. They have no idea what it’s like to be in our shoes. That’s why we congregate here to support one another. Good luck with your clinic, I’m sure they’ll be able to help xx

[Bing84 in reply to Shirazlover2013]

Hey shirazlover2013 thank you for sharing your journey, I can definitely relate especially what you said about your dear boy. I am starting to think maybe our little girl was our miracle. Determined though to not let our ongoing struggles affect the time we spend and devote to her. But as I am sure you probably find too, she is at an age where she is asking about a brother and sister. To all those who haven’t got their miracle baby yet, I do not wish to sound in anyway ungrateful for what we have but it is an unique situation to be.

Hoping everyone gets their happy ever after xx