Much needed venting

[Nessie86]

Hi everyone it’s been a while since I posted on here so thought I’d update on my progress.

3 months ago I posted saying we’d been messed about with our appointment for fertility clinic but we got another appointment the week after. So we though perfect things are finally moving.

Consultant was friendly and said all our tests came back as normal - I still had a blocked and twisted tubes but nothing the deemed worrisome that required surgery so he said he’d like to now refer us on to assisted conception unit. Now as you can imagine we were overjoyed - IVF was finally in sight.

Last month we had our first appointment at assisted conception unit. The consultant went over all our test results and said “are you aware you require surgery?” My face probably said it all! I’d been told by two consultants at different hospitals I didn’t need it and two said I did.

In fairness the consultant looked taken aback that we’d been wrongly informed. Stating that the HSG test was over 18 months old and showed my tube was partially blocked and now definitely be fully blocked - surgery is a must.

I should point out our GP referred us to our local hospital over 2 and a half years ago. Local hospital did some tests and referred us to private clinic who never even saw us - just saw our results and said I did need surgery and they weren’t equipped to do it and referred us back to local hospital. Local hospital then referred us to nhs hospital. I hadn’t heard from anyone in 4 weeks so I phoned local hospital gynae sec and was told they hadn’t referred me yet and that is was a very long process.

Anyway we’ve finally got the date for the op next month. This hospital is nearly a two hour drive away but is slowly restoring my faith in the nhs cause my god have we been messed about something awful.

My emotions are all over the damn place. One minute I’m elated over getting the op date and the next I’m crying over yet another pregnancy announcement on social media.

Sorry for the long spiel everyone but I don’t have many friend. I have no family locally and the hubby isn’t one for emotions so kinda needed to vent a little x

[Dream76]

Hi Nessie

I am sorry you are going through this delay. I understand you as I am sailing in the same boat. This delay from nhs, the referrals, the doc experimenting (trial & error) this and that has made a lot of delay. After 4 yrs of their experiments with medicines and ops. I am 40 now and still things are delaying a lot.

Just be firm and ask them every question you have in mind.

Good luck for your op. Please take care.

[Nessie86 in reply to Dream76]

Thank you wise76 isn’t it frustrating! And close friends and family don’t really get it at all. I used to always get the - it’ll happen when it happens speech lol 🙄 I must admit this process has definitely made me more outspoken and I chase things up more now

[Dream76 in reply to Nessie86]

It is very frustrating. This time my husband was talking in frustration with the nurse as she was trying to control the discussion and not letting us asked. My husband shouted and cut her conversation in between and asked “so are you saying that you are doing everything the way it should be done or are you going to add on things after the failure. She got angry and said “we are”. Bcoz he is fed up with delays and waiting time at the clinic. Feel free to share when ever you want as sometimes we all need to and most importantly with regards to ttc.

[Nessie86 in reply to Dream76]

Staff really should be understanding of the situation and allow us to ask questions if nothing but to alleviate our fears! I love that this forum exists as we all definitely need someone to talk to - especially when they’re going through the same thing 😊 x

[Kempton]

Sorry to read about your ordeal! But I'm glad you're getting your confidence back in the nhs. I only ever had positive experiences when I went through all my fertility tests and final assisted conception.

Will ivf be the next step after your surgery?

[Nessie86 in reply to Kempton]

Hi kempton I do normally have faith in the nhs just doesn’t seem to be the case with our fertility journey. Yes after I’ve recovered from surgery it will be IVF I’m just not sure of the wait time between them

[Kempton in reply to Nessie86]

Hopefully only a few months. It was really quick for us. Referral in Jan and then we had a funded cycle in the March. Fingers crossed it'll be speedy for you, but I guess they'll also have to take into account recovery time posy surgery.