Time off work : Hello , we are about to... - Fertility Network UK

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Time off work

tish44 profile image
40 Replies

Hello , we are about to have our final cycle of IVF with our remaining embryo.

Has anyone taken time off work during their ivf ?

Friends are telling me I should take time out to give this last go my best shot. Really don’t know what to do , any advice appreciated 😊, xx

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tish44 profile image
tish44
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LegoBatgirl profile image
LegoBatgirl

I'm about to start my first round and I can barely get time off for the scans, collection and transfer- I have to work overtime to 'make up' the time I'll miss but unfortunately this is normal practice for my employer who put you on disciplinary action if you have 3 days of sick in a year (3 days!). I'll have to work all through my 2ww.

If you can afford the time and want it then you're lucky to have it. I would make the most of it x

Box01 profile image
Box01 in reply toLegoBatgirl

Unrelated to the original post but your work sounds awful, is that even legal? You can't help it if your unwell, its hardly a reason to give some a disciplinary, very bad employer, they should be ashamed. Hopefully you get preggers and out of there 😊 xx

LegoBatgirl profile image
LegoBatgirl in reply toBox01

Thanks hun I appreciate your response. I think they had too many people exploiting the sick system in the past so they just have an almost zero tolerance policy now :(

They distinguish between leave for medical treatment that is necessary and treatment that is 'voluntary,' so all my IVF they treat as a 'choice'. I wish I had more annual leave to use for it but I'd already booked holidays etc before I knew I'd need my vacation days for treatment. I don't want to delay it as I've waited a long time to have a family so I just have to try my best to juggle work and treatment.

Not sure what stage you're at but best of luck with your journey, thanks so much for taking the time to reply x

_MrsC profile image
_MrsC in reply toLegoBatgirl

How does your employer treat working parents? If their child is ill and they need to stay home to look after them, are they given disciplinary action too? After all, they could argue that is a choice. Is there any way you can find a new job? It can’t be helping your fertility journey. Do you have a union or anything similar that you belong to? Sounds like you need some employment support. xxx

LegoBatgirl profile image
LegoBatgirl in reply to_MrsC

Yeah they argue that as we have flexible working it's up to us to properly manage our 'time and sickness'. I really appreciate your response though x

tish44 profile image
tish44 in reply toLegoBatgirl

Thank you for your advice , xx

Lisaworthy1981 profile image
Lisaworthy1981

I about to have my frozen transfer on Tuesday!!

I am having a week off work to do nice things and rest!!

With my first transfer I worked right through it and ended with a chemical pregnancy!! I’m not saying working was the reason cause it probably wasn’t but we want to try everything possible this time xxx

tish44 profile image
tish44 in reply toLisaworthy1981

Thank you for sharing your experience, xx

genten profile image
genten

I'll be having my first FET at some point this coming week and I will be working through. I will be off on EC day then back in the day after.

I think it totally depends how you feel. I don't mind working through as I think it will take my mind off it slightly but we're all different. Xx

tish44 profile image
tish44 in reply togenten

Thank you for your advice , xx

Faithful06 profile image
Faithful06

I took 2 weeks off after transfer of my first cycle ended up a chemical pregnancy. Second time I took 5 days off BFN. This time I’m taking 5 days off as well.

You have to do what you think is best for you Hun. Good luck.

tish44 profile image
tish44 in reply toFaithful06

Thank you 😘 xx

TRYING2016 profile image
TRYING2016

Take time off even if its a few days your body will let you know if you need anymore time off xx

tish44 profile image
tish44 in reply toTRYING2016

Your advice is appreciated, xx

Nickimidge profile image
Nickimidge

I took 3 weeks off from egg collection to otd and and i got a bfp. I work in a stressful environment so i wasn’t prepared to put myself in that situation during my tww. Wishing you lots of luck for your final cycle, fingers crossed this is the one! 🤞🏼😘 xx

tish44 profile image
tish44 in reply toNickimidge

I work in a busy hospital & after 4 failed cycles and working through them all in my heart I know I have to put myself first this final time , thank you for sharing your experience, xx

TRYING2016 profile image
TRYING2016 in reply totish44

Put yourself first, ive always put work first and went in to work the days i needed desperately to be at home and realised it wasn’t worth it. As this is your final time try book it off or get a sick note x

NB610 profile image
NB610

First cycle I didn't take time off after the transfer, it was done on a Saturday n I was back at work on the Monday, when we had out FET I wanted to give it a good shot I had 5 days off, I find my job quite stressful so found the time off beneficial xx

tish44 profile image
tish44 in reply toNB610

Thank you for your reply , much appreciated xx

Gem5 profile image
Gem5

I worked through my first round and got a bfn, I took two weeks off this round and got my 1st bfp in 12 yrs. may not be related at all but if I had to do it again I would take time off

tish44 profile image
tish44 in reply toGem5

This final time I think I definitely need to take some time , have feelings of guilt as I’m never off work but have to give this last go my best shot , thank you for sharing your experience, xx

My employer is the same,not at all helpful and the only thing offered is unpaid leave days for scans etc. I’m cabin crew and my hospital is an hour away,the stress of then having to take unpaid leave doing the long protocol will leave me hugely out of pocket and I don’t see why we should be penalised for having to go through ivf. I explained to my doctor last week who was amazing and agreed you need to not be stressed out and they need to be more accommodating so for that she’s signing me off for the whole protocol. She said if it’s maternity related which it is as we are injecting etc to get pregnant then it should be covered under a maternity policy and there isn’t really anything they can do about it. Good luck 🙏

tish44 profile image
tish44 in reply to

Your advice is v much appreciated xx

Devj profile image
Devj

I didn’t take time off with my first fresh cycle and it failed. For my next frozen I took pretty much all the 2ww off work and it was successful and I have my miracle 2 and half year old. Had my remaining 2 frozen blastos transferred last month and took the 2ww off work again and am currently 6 weeks pregnant awaiting my scan next week. Time off work, I think, worked for me. Although I only have a desk job it can be stressful at times and have to go up and down stairs all day between offices. If you are able to take time off work I would definitely recommend it but understand it is not always possible.

Good luck with your final cycle xxx

tish44 profile image
tish44 in reply toDevj

Congratulations, hope your scan goes well. Thank you for sharing how you handled your cycles. I really am going to ensure I take some time off , really don’t want to think ‘what if ?’ & it being our last go, xx

hannahkc profile image
hannahkc

Hi Tish, are you able to discuss with your boss or a HR/welfare rep, or find out what your employer policy is on this as medical leave?

E.g. is it considered the same as for maternity-related appointments/scans etc by your employer? ( Which it should be IMO and for many employers is)

In my company it is so for example I had EC 1 full day as medical leave and ET as a 1/2 a day . Didn't take any sick leave for symptoms or stress etc but could have if necessary.

That aside in terms of taking holiday it's your choice, if your job is stressful like many of the ladies on here are saying then some down time may be good?

For myself I actually prefer to keep busy to take my mind off it didn't take much time off but it's up to you and how much holiday you can take?

On here there are many posts from 2ww-ers all spending the time in different ways...

I have an FET coming up and taking the clinic appt as a half day medical leave but have decided to take the rest of the day as holiday. My OH will be taking holiday the whole day so we will probably treat ourselves to go to cinema or veg at home with a movie the rest of the day.

But after that the dreaded 2ww I think I'll try to go back to a 'normal' routine!, 😁😌

tish44 profile image
tish44 in reply tohannahkc

In my previous cycles I have used annual leave , I work in a hospital, spoke to HR & my Trust doesn’t have an ivf policy. After 4 failed cycles in my heart I know this time I have to take some sick leave & put myself first , thank you for your reply , really appreciate it , xx

hannahkc profile image
hannahkc in reply totish44

Oh my, sorry to hear there isn't an IVF policy, NHS as well!

Pretty ridiculous.

From your experience though I think you are definitely doing the right thing to take time out and take care of you!!

Def speak to your GP if they could help you with this.

Good luck with it!🤞💕

tish44 profile image
tish44 in reply tohannahkc

Thank you , it’s even more stressful knowing it is our last chance , had a good chat with my hubby last night & he supports me taking time off , will also speak to my GP 😘 xx

LKT1 profile image
LKT1

I don’t think there is a right or wrong answer here but down to how stressful your job is and personal choice. However, when I get to this point I’m going to do my best to tie in with time off. I know the results are down to how your body responds but if it wasn’t successful I don’t want ‘what if’ thoughts creeping in my mind. X

tish44 profile image
tish44 in reply toLKT1

It’s the ‘what if’ thoughts that I don’t want. My job can be stressful at times , late leaving & grabbing lunch etc when you get 5mins isn’t ideal. I know deep down I have to put myself first & not worry about letting people down at work.

Thank you for your reply, much appreciated, xx

Hi tish44,

I have my first round of ivf starting next month and I am taking 2 weeks holiday before egg collection followed by 2 weeks sick leave after. I work in a high stress environment and my employer has been very understanding. I have a friend who I work with who just took the time from egg collection and she advised me to do this as she really found it hard. My employer understands that I am not going to be functioning at 100% and we agreed that this was the best thing for everyone.

You need to do what feels right for you, you could try working through and then just ask for the time if you can’t manage.

Good luck xx

tish44 profile image
tish44 in reply toDazed_and_Confused55

I really appreciate you sharing about your ivf , thank you xx

Magdalenach profile image
Magdalenach

I didn't take any days off after my first transfer and had bfn... I was devastated that's why I'm going to take time off after next frozen one. I think driving 40-60 miles a day made it unsuccessful...silly me 😔 We even decided to cancel our holidays in Oct.

Good luck Tish🤞🍀😊

tish44 profile image
tish44 in reply toMagdalenach

Thank you for your reply , v much appreciated, xx

Jane_30 profile image
Jane_30

Good morning,

i believe that you should take time off work... and trying to relax, rest,.. whatever make you happy, positive, calm,...

After 2 unsuccessful IUIs, we went to IVF - and i stayed at home during 2ww - and the result was BFP! (i don't know if thats the reason but it was a good decision 😉)

Enjoy your time ❤️☺️

Jane_30 profile image
Jane_30

Oh, and GOOD LUCK ❤️🍀🍀🤞🤞

tish44 profile image
tish44 in reply toJane_30

Thank you so much for your reply. I think I know what I need to do. Your advice is appreciated so much , xx

Sarahlou01 profile image
Sarahlou01

You have to do what you feel is right for you. I took time off for my first cycle, stayed at home chilled out and pampered myself and unfortunately it failed. The second time we went away on a lovely relaxing holiday after transfer and spent the week on the beach and again it failed! This time round I went to work, carried on as normal and I am now 18 weeks pregnant so I really don’t think it matters what you do! Wishing you lots of luck xxxx

lucylob profile image
lucylob

My first collection and transfer I only had two days off after each and then 3 days off after it failed. My fET I was signed off by the dr for my whole tww and the week after and it was good news! Currently 9 weeks 5 days ! My advise would be to keep busy! I went to west wales for the weeek, then Blackpool for a weekend for the dartS... don’t ask and then the last few Days I went for lunch, met up with friends and family and made time for myself ! You’ve got nothing to lose by takin time off ! I have everything crossed for you 💗

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