Went up to the hospital for my 21 day scan and injection to start my FET treatment but my scan showed a 3.5cm cyst on my right ovary which the hospital think could be blood filled rather than a clear cyst - no treatment and to go back within three days of my period to check if it's went away or got smaller - why do I feel so distraught?!
I just wanted to get treatment started and now I feel like giving up before it's begun.
All this positive thinking is a load of poo - back at work now but just want to crawl into bed and cry. To make matters worse me and my husband ended up falling out in the car on the way home so now I have no one to talk to as we decided to keep it a secret this time.
Sobbing my little heart out and just feel like giving up, I really do xxx
You poor thing, am so sorry that’s happened, it’s just awful how there’s no rhyme or reason why our bodies decide to do these things, and then the very experts we put ourselves in the hands of don’t seem to have the answers either!! More waiting and seeing which is one of the hardest parts of this journey, along with th pitfalls and curveballs you just don’t expect. I’m in a similar state of limbo now as I wait for another scan on Friday to see if the fluid they found (again!!) on Monday has gone and we can proceed to FET or not. It’s so lonely not being able to be open with people around you - my family and some friends know but no one at work does, so it’s virtually impossible to feel engaged and look focused when behind the scenes I feel a complete wreck!! I just want to rage at the world too. Can you say you’re not well and head home for some rest? Sorry you’ve had a row with your husband too, that’ll be weighing in your mind.. emotions run so high on both sides through this, and it’s hard for them to fully understand, even if they want to. Odd they won’t give you treatment - can you get a second opinion or speak to your consultant for more info? Try not to google everything if you possibly can, it is not your friend at these times. Sending you loads of love and support ✨💛 xxx
Guess what I was doing when you messaged - Googling! I promise I will stay away from now lol.
I'm just gutted as today was meant to be 'the day' but I've come away with nothing and I feel a bit defeated before I've even started.
It's so frustrating isn't it? I'm starting to dread my appointments now and I have honestly been trying to stay positive and happy.
My hospital said they can sometimes be over cautious but feel confident that once my period is here the cyst will have shrunk or even disappeared so now I just have to sit and wait for another wonderful period...
I ended up snapping at my hubby as he keeps telling me to be positive and happy and I just needed him to let me wallow for today and let me be sad if that makes sense? I'm sure we'll be fine after work just a shame we are both upset and disappointed. I don't think men ever fully get it even though they try very hard.
Good luck for Friday - I really hope you get the green light xxx
Ahh bloody google! It’s such a double edged sword. Good luck trying to stay off, I should take my own advice more 🙈🤪 I dread my appointments too if it helps. I said to my husband last night that if this cycle gets cancelled then I honestly don’t know what’s worse - stopping altogether or trying again. Impossible situation but the mental strain of it is just awful. Hope you get home and have a good cuddle and cry with your man, you just have to let it out or it gets worse. I know people try to be positive for you but I can find it quite stifling sometimes when all you want to do is vent and rant about the shitness of it all! Big love 💛
No problem at all, keep me posted on how you get on and just shout or PM me if you need to rant xx and thanks for the well wishes too, I’ll let you know when I have an update xx
Hi LauraM1986. Oh dear you poor love. All I can prop you up with is that an endometrial cyst can stay awhile, but a clear, simple one that is increasing in size, may twist, so needs draining. Hopefully this is just a hiccup, so let's hope it does settle back down. Thinking of you loads. Diane
Thanks Diane.The hospital seemed to think it was blood filled due to darkness on the scan and thought it could be from when I ovulated? Hopefully it all calms down and we can get back on track xx
DianeArnoldPartnerNurseFertility Network UK• in reply to
Hi. Yes, that could be, so hopefully it will break down and reabsorb itself. Fingers crossed. Diane
Ahhh Laura! You sound like having a crappy the of it! In so sorry that your treatment has been delayed, so disappointing for you and completely understand your frustration! You'll get a good cry tonight and hopefully you and hubby will soon be back talking. It's such a highly emotional time that the smallest thing can cause an argument! Hopefully you get better news at your next appt. Sending big hugs.xx
Thank you, how's your tww going hun? I think I've spent four months building up to the day we can start again after being mentally broken and I just thought yesterday was the start of our second chance. Today I just feel the most unpregnant ever but hopefully I'll get over myself and get back to being positive soon lol xxx
It's ok so far....only day 2! We had to wait ages to get yo this transfer again with one thing or another & know who frustrating it can be. Hopefully just small bump in the road for you so you can get on soon!xx
Laura I really feel for you. Going through pretty much the same thing right now, our FET is delayed due to a 3cm cyst. I’m having double buserelin to try and reduce it. Have also fallen out with husband after he decided to share my medical information with his parents despite me directly asking him not to. It’s the last thing we need. I know how crap it is. Hope things will start looking up for you soon xx
I'm sorry you're going through this too. Men really don't get it do they? I think I just pinned everything on yesterday and today I feel very empty and sad 😔 xxx
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