I found out that I was pregnant a few weeks ago after 2 failed IUIs and this was our second attempt at IVF. I had the initial blood tests confirming and all my levels were great and then another blood test 3 days later just to make sure my levels were still tracking fine and they were exceptional. I was elated and over the moon as this was the first time that I had been pregnant.
I've had pretty awful morning sickness for the last 2 weeks and went in for my scan yesterday morning. My doctor greeted and congratulated us only to have the scan and see a perfectly formed placenta but no embryo.
My joy turned to heart break within a couple of minutes as I did not even think that this could be a possibility and certainly was not what I was expecting going into this appointment.
I now need to book in for a D&C to end the 'pregnancy'. I would love some advice from anyone that has been through this and how you managed to get over this loss. I've always been the strong and tough one but am completely devastated.
Christine x
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ChristineB05
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Sorry for your loss miscarrying is awful, I’m currently miscarrying again at 12w for the 2nd time I haven’t had a d&c I did the 1st naturally and it looks like this one will be the same I have to go for another scan a week on Friday if it hasn’t gone and they will give options. It is hard emotionally when you’ve planned your near future with the baby growing in your belly to be snatched away for no reason. 😢😢
Thank you for your kind words. I'm so sorry to hear that you are going through this a second time. It is difficult when what you have wanted for so long gets snatched away unexpectedly.
Take care, thinking of you during this difficult time.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my baby at 10 weeks and it’s truly devestating. The best advice people gave me at the time was to let myself grieve and be kind to myself. It’s so heartbreaking. It’s a bereavement process to go through. I’m so so sorry for your loss x
Thank you Kathryn for your kind words. I'm so sorry to hear that you have been through this loss too. It is devastating and heart breaking, I appreciate your advice x
I am so sorry to be reading your post. I feel so sad for you, I have watched my Daughter and Son in Law go through this, and you are definitely getting the right advice. The only way that they could cope was to go away for a few days together and take time with each other to grieve for what had been taken away from them. What also kept them going was HOPE. They never gave up although it was very difficult, they now have twins who are 5 months old, they are miracles. Sending you a hug xx
Thank you Evie for your kind words and encouragement. We are actually going away for a long weekend as we had planned this a few weeks back and agree the time together for us to grieve is important.
Thank you for sharing your daughter and son in laws experience it is wonderful to hear this and it does give me hope x
So sorry for your loss Christine. I had two missed miscarriages last year after ivf treatment at 8 and a half weeks and 10 weeks. It is absolutely heartbreaking but all you can do is take one day at a time, put one foot in front of the other and keep breathing. It will be really really hard but it will get easier bit by bit xx
Thanks lovely I appreciate your kind words and I'm so sorry to hear that you too have experienced this loss x
So sorry for your loss lovely. Look after you in this difficult time xx. I understand the disbelief. We had bloods and scans showing everything absolutely perfect only to miscarry less than 24 hours later. I think the shock and disbelief was the hardest part. How can it be so perfect then be gone? Time has helped. Sending you big hugs xxx
I've not miscarried but had 2 ectopic pregnancies which were also devastating. Make sure you utilise the support around you and communicate how you feel even if it's just wanting to scream. I found bottling it up made it so much worse. You will get through it xx
Thanks lovely appreciate your kind words and advice x
I’m so sorry for your loss. I miscarried last year at 4.5 weeks; I had a scan at 6 weeks which confirmed my loss. I tried to take the positive from it; I conceived we’d never managed before!
Unlike you tho I’d had bleeding so knew it was over I was expecting bad news at the scan but you weren’t.. To have the good levels of HCG & no signs of an impending miscarriage then to get that news must have been such a shock. I’m so sorry it’s such an awful thing to go through particularly after bravely fighting infertility.
P.s although it won’t feel like it now or for a while you will get through this and will somehow find the strength to keep trying. ❤️❤️❤️ xoxo
I am so sorry for your loss Christine. I miscarried not long before my viability scan following IVF FET and it really is the most devastating feeling. I'm afraid I can't offer any advice about the D&C as my body did it naturally. However, when it comes to grieving your loss the best (and possibly worst) thing I was told was that there is no right way and no wrong way and no definitive timeline. I blocked it all out to start with and just kind of 'moved on' but it really hit me later. I found that counselling really helped me to process my thoughts and have learnt that it will continue to affect me when I least expect it - the grief cycle isn't linear and it's possible to go backwards or forwards at any time. We arranged a short private service at the church where we married on the day that our "tissue" was communally cremated by the hospital which helped to at least partially say goodbye and felt like we were marking our baby's existence even though he/she never even had a heartbeat. I know that probably doesn't help enormously but please be reassured that it does get better, or perhaps just easier to deal with as time goes on. I'm currently 2 days in to the 2ww from a new fresh IVF cycle but tomorrow would have been my due date - it's a very strange feeling. Sending you lots of love and gentle hugs at this horrible time for you xxx
Hi Christine i am so sorry for your loss, i understand the pain having had a missed miscarriage at 7 weeks. It sounds like it may have been a blighted ovum when the pregnancy had began but the embryo didn't form correctly, hense why you still had the pregnancy symptoms morning sickness etc as the placenta was pumping out sufficient HCG hormone. Similar to mine back in 2018 before having my son in 2019, i too had good HCG level 39,000 at 6 weeks, and terrible morning sickness, then at scan in December 2017, could see an embryo in the sac but only measuring about 5.5-6 weeks and i should have been 7+ weeks. There was no heartbeat. . Do you have any further frozen embryos?. Hope is what kept me going. I am sure another transfer really soon will work out just fine for you. Take some time to allow your Partners love to comfort you and once you feel ready then begin to look at your next options going forward. Grieving time is personal and can't and shouldn't be rushed. Hugs and warm wishes x x
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