Fertility Network UK
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Mixed emotions

Hi everyone,

I hope everyone is well?

I have been quite for away after my first round of ivf, we unfortunately lost the baby at 16 weeks :( so been a lot going on!

But our second round is due to start end of June :), bur me and my partner have been arguing quite a lot lately and i'm really worried that we may be thinking on going separate wasy's..... Which i truly hope doesn't happen. We have been arguing a lot about money and silly things, i don't want to go into my second round unsure of what the future holds for us and the baby if things if my second round works.

As i fall under the West Sussex area i only a year to have my two try's on the NHS, so i have to have my second around at least by July.

PLEASE can anyone relate to this? I really dont know what to do for the best!

K xxx

3 Replies

Hi, sorry for your loss and to hear that you are going through such a hard time. IVF and the loss of a child in particular can put a massive strain on a marriage. Could the little arguments just be masking an underlying issue - the fact that you are both still grieving and taking it out on each other? Have you tried counselling to talk about everything that’s happened? You clinic should be able to refer you for it if it’s something you think might be beneficial x


Yeah i have spoken to hospital in regards to counselling, but i think it may just more than the lost of the child! i'm really in a mixed up position and my partner is such a hard person to speak with, he just try to ignore the situation and thinks everything is ok!

Thank you for getting back to me :) x


I think that’s a typical male reaction to shut themselves off and not talk about things. They can be so frustrating sometimes! If it were me I would tell him that I wasn’t coping very well and I wanted to go for counselling for me to help see if it would help with the healing process. I would then say that it would be helpful if he came along to support me. He may not go with it but even if he doesn’t you may still find counselling on your own helpful. Good luck x


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