Visting the inlaws

So me and my husband and current visting his family for a couple of days, I got myself upset at the airport just because we don't have a baby and the same old you hoped one day you'd be prading your child around.

Of course all his family all have small children which they totally dote on, so my sister in law came round last night and I struggled so much seeing my husband been so natural with her child 😢 it just seems so unfair that I can't give him something we both yearn for so much. The whole evening was focused on the child and what she could and couldn't do and I was sat so uncomfortable and probably looking miserable. I've never been natural around other people's children ( my mam was the same) I think because I'm quite I just never know what to do or say to them it never feels natural lol.

So tonight we have more of the same his other sister is coming to see us with her 2 children siiiggghhhhhh .

I just want my own little baby so much and it hurts every day ( I know I don't need to tell you ladies ).

I'm so scared of what the future holds and petrified of never having my own child even though we have DE treatment planned later in the year 😕.

I'm sorry for ranting on here but even my hubby doesn't seem to get it.

Love to you all whatever stage your at on your journey and I hope one day you all get your miracel baby's xx

[Ssharu123]

It’s ok to share your feelings

Even I feel the same sometimes

But believe that one day you will hold a beautiful baby in your arms and that will come soon

Just dnt give up

[Hidden in reply to Ssharu123]

Thank you 😊, this journey is so tough and people just don't get it , not once has any of his family asked how we are doing or anything I know people won't know what to say or do but even when I mentioned we need to loose weight as referring to before we start treatment again his sister said awwww yeah it's that time of year isn't it we all feel like that !

I wanted to scream no for us to start ivf!

I hope your 2ww is going well and I hope u get your BFP xx

[Hidden]

I totally get it. I too had so much pain whenever I saw a father with young children. Family and friends don't truly understand the pain of the journey. A Harvard University Study showed the stress levels of women experiencing infertility were equivalent to those with AIDs, cancer and heart disease. And then they tell us just to relax! So it's good to vent sometimes and this is a safe place to do that.

The pain I had was caused by my subconscious belief it would never happen. Part of me didn't want to believe it as i didn't want to get our hopes up or have a more heart ache if it didn't. How positive is positive enough without being too positive?! I did a short video on that the other day. youtu.be/HFivybRwSZ8(Not working as expected?)

I saw others with a baby and was telling myself it may never happen for us. That's the pain. The truth is nothing can predict the future. We got pregnant naturally ahead of ICSI against all odds. The doctors said it would never happen.

Hang in there. Find people you can vent to who will hold a space for you without judgement, who will seek to understand how you feel. Sadly, I also get what you said about your husband, because I was that man for many years on our journey. It took me a while to get the message but then I learnt (and am still learning!) to listen and hold that space for my wife without trying to make her feelings go away or 'fix' things. So rant away! x

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Thank you , I feel so guilty as they are family after all.

I usually rant at my mam as she is good so it's hard as we are away .

I'm glad I'm not the only one that feels like that

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Yeah, we think we should be completely OK with family as they are family and we love them. But we are human! x