our hearts are broken πŸ’”: sadly I now... - Fertility Network UK

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our hearts are broken πŸ’”

vic77 profile image
vic77
β€’94 Replies

sadly I now write the very post that I hate to see on here and hoped I would never write.we had our 12 week scan today and sadly our baby stopped growing around 10 weeks..we have no words and are so devestated..I don't even know what to do tonight let alone the options regarding management of our miscarriage which I need to decide...I don' understand the tetminology, the leaflets i cant read...what so people do...none of the options are preferrable 😒😒my heart is broken...5 ivf cycles our first ever bfp now this. .life is so so cruel. .I know recently others on here have had similar news to you I send my love and to others going through this immeasurable pain...how will I go on from here😒😒😒lots of love xx

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vic77
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Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5

Oh Vic, my lovely!!😒 I'm so so sorry to read this. I have no words that can help but know that I'm thinking of you both at this awful time!!πŸ’” Life is beyond cruel!! Sending lots of love.xxxxx

penny24 profile image
penny24

Oh I am so sorry to read your post. You are right life is cruel. Thinking of you and sending hugs xxx

E_05 profile image
E_05

My heart sunk when I saw your title, I am so sorry for you both. Please take time and make the choice that is right for you both but also feel free to ask questions to me or any of us that have been through medical management. Thinking of you xx

Dreamingofbaby profile image
Dreamingofbaby

Oh so sorry to hear this. Is so devastating and def cruel Not fair indeed. U take time n let all sink in a before making decisions. All what best for u guys. Here to chat as needed. Xx

Oh my lovely what terrible news and what hard choices you have to make. I’m so so sorry for your loss xxxx

Emmad781 profile image
Emmad781

I'm truly sorry to be reading this, and yes life can be so cruel.

You will some how find the strength to carry on and possibly try again as that's what us ivf warrior women do.

Sending you love xx

hannahi profile image
hannahi

I'm so so sorry Vic, life's so cruel 😒 xxxx

NsKaz profile image
NsKaz

Oh hun I am so so gutted for you. So sorry to hear that you are having to go through yet more heartbreak. Life can be so cruel. Xxx

Smang profile image
Smang

Vic77 I have no words or know what to say asides from so sorry xx

Such devasting news - I'm so sorry you're having to go through this. It breaks my heart to see such courageous women go through heartache time and time again. I am thinking of you and your OH at this difficult time. Take care of yourselves xx

Tugsgirl profile image
Tugsgirl

❀️ Text me whenever you want xx

Leo2017 profile image
Leo2017

Oh no, I’m so truly sorry to read this!! heartbroken for you!! πŸ’” I went thru this at 10wks just a couple of wks ago, so I can relate to the despair you & your OH are feeling!!

The decisions to make are so tough - but we chose surgical in the end!! Please feel free to ask if I can help with any questions!!

Sending you lots of love & strength!! 😒xxx

Rachwithers profile image
Rachwithers

I am so sorry, words aren’t enough β™₯️

7AVA profile image
7AVA

Oh no Vic - I’m so, so sad to read this tonight. I wish this was not true. I’m so, so sorry this is happening to you. I know it is not a great comfort but we are here to support you in any way we can. So sad for you tonight. Xxxx

Fredaflintstone profile image
Fredaflintstone

Oh Vic I am so sorry to hear this. I can't imagine the pain you must be feeling. So sorry. Sending you the biggest of hugs and strength to get through this. X

emu2016 profile image
emu2016

Oh Vic. One lonely tear wandered down my face reading this. You’ve been on such a rollercoaster. I’m sending you so much love and strength right now. I cannot imagine making that decision. Lean on us all when you need us. Xx

Hi Vic... I wish I had words to say to you, but I cannot think of anything that could make you feel better. There is no justice but there is future. I just wish all our good thoughts could stop this pain... I send you all my love, I hope you can feel some warmth coming from everybody here.

Ssharu123 profile image
Ssharu123

This is really sad and devastating

But I really feel you will find a way to come out of this sorrow

Pls do not give up and keep fighting

But the most important thing is take care of your health right now

Pls take care

I’m so sorry to hear you extremely sad news. Am thinking of you both xxx

Oh vic77 I cannot believe you are going through this so totally cruel. I’m so so sorry. My heart is completely broken for you.

I can’t comment on any of the procedures as I lost my baby at 4 and a half weeks and all the pregnancy content had gone by the 6 week scan.

I know there is nothing anyone can say to make this better but wanted to say I am thinking of you and hope you have lots of support around you πŸ’—πŸ’—πŸ’— xoxo

Oh no I'm so sorry to hear that, just wanted to send you huge hug, life is so cruel

xx

Wishfully profile image
Wishfully

Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry to hear this vic77 . Devasting news, I can’t even begin to imagine. Sending all my love xxx

I have no idea what to say but am so sorry for your loss xxxxxx

RidleyNL profile image
RidleyNL

Oh no. This is truly awful, I am so sorry. No one wants to read this, let alone go through it. You’re right there are no words but we are all here thinking of you and wishing you well. Take your time and you will heal even though it feels so devastating now. So sorry again. Sending love xxx

Orla9298 profile image
Orla9298

I can’t even believe this, I’m so so so so sorry lovely. Life is the cruelest sometimes and I wish everything was ok. Sending you lots of love xxxx

Jenjen84 profile image
Jenjen84

I’m so sorry to read this.. Life is so unfair.. Thinking of you and sending lots of love xxx

Drives profile image
Drives

Can't even begin to understand what you are going through πŸ’” sending lots of love your way x x

That’s so heartbreaking 😒

destiny121 profile image
destiny121

I have no words and nothing anyone says will make it better.... all i can say is take care of yourself, scream, cry, shout do whatever you have to as only you will understand your pain and suffering right now and you have every right to my love.... 😒😒

CheshireKit profile image
CheshireKit

Oh bless you Vic I’m so so sorry 😒 Life is unbelievably cruel, after everything you’ve been through to get to this point and now have it cruelly take away it is so unfair. There are no words that can make things better but please know I’m sending you all the love in the world and massive hugs 😘

You’ll probably be in shock at the moment so don’t worry about making any decisions regarding what to do next, especially not tonight. Take your time to feel everything you feel and please be kind to yourself. I wish I could take the pain away for you. PM me if you need a chat. Big love πŸ’• xxx

cryst4l profile image
cryst4l

So sorry to hear this. Sending hugs and hope you get through this awful time the best you can. You have us all on here for support. Stay strong. x

kt_11 profile image
kt_11

So so sorry to read this. I know there’s nothing that can be said right now other than that I’m thinking of you xx

Autumnmoon profile image
Autumnmoon

Oh my love so sorry to read this I truly can't imagine how you must be feeling right now it is just too cruel I can only hope that you have all the care that you need for as long as it takes xx

I'm so very sorry to hear this, life is so cruel. Take care of yourselves. Sending lots of love xxx

Ash2016 profile image
Ash2016

Oh Vicky, I'm so sorry to be reading this. Life is so cruel! I can't believe this has happened to you. Lots of love and thinking of you xxx

Looby25 profile image
Looby25

Heartbreaking, I’m so very sorry for your loss, I can not imagine!! Life is so unbelievably cruel at times! My thoughts are with you and your OH at this terrible time, sending love xxx

sanj76 profile image
sanj76

O vic I’m so so sorry to read such sad news. My thoughts are with you during this ever so difficult time. There simply is not enough words. I sincerely and whole heartily wish you all the best in whatever steps you take from here.

It may not seem like it right now, nor will it seem like it tomorrow or the next day either... but take it 1 minute at a time, take it slowly, be kind to yourself and grieve even if it means screaming to the world how much you hate it.

My heart breaks for you as do many others of us that have been through this to x

_MrsC profile image
_MrsC

Oh I am so very sorry! My heart is heavy for you. I get so pleased when one of you girls gets a bfp. I think well it didn’t work for me but thank goodness it worked for one of the lovely ladies. So the disappointment when I see such sad posts is so big too. I really feel so very sad for you. I will pray for you over the coming weeks and hope that peace will come to you even if it is in small glimpses. Sending a huge hug. xxx

katya38 profile image
katya38

Im so incredibly sorry thinking of u cxx

Lynne496 profile image
Lynne496

So sorry for you xx

baby2016 profile image
baby2016

Oh Vic 😒😒😒😒 my heart is breaking for you πŸ’”πŸ’” there are truly no words that will ease your pain and I'm still in shock from reading this post. I really wish there was something I could do to help you. Sending you so much love and hugs of support xxx

I’m so sorry to hear this news... I can feel your pain through each word and it’s got me in tears 😒 thinking of you both x β™₯️ lots of love xx 😘

LR16 profile image
LR16

I’m so sorry to hear this and sending you much love at what is a very difficult time for you. You are clearly a very strong person to have got as far as you have - keep remembering that. Sending prayers and love xxx

AllWeNeedIsluv profile image
AllWeNeedIsluv

I'm wounded for you this is so cruel. I was praying everything was ok I am so very very sorry my love no one deserves to go through this. Sending you so much love and hugs. Were all here for you hun. πŸ’πŸ’πŸ’πŸ˜˜

Sherry07 profile image
Sherry07

Oh I’m so so sorry to hear this. Nobody should experience what we go through. Very cruel world :(

Sherry07 profile image
Sherry07

Give yourself some time; you don’t have to make a decision now honey. Sending love and peace xx

So very sorry. Sending love to you both ❀️

Flimzee profile image
Flimzee

I am so sorry to hear this. Why can life be so hard? Thinking about you and wishing you strength and sending love xxx

Becky179 profile image
Becky179

Oh Vic, I'm so sorry to be reading this. I know how you must be feeling as this happened to us at our 12 week scan in January. I opted for surgical management. But take your time to decide what is best for you. Please message me if you want any advice or just a chat. Lots of love xxx

Sara-J- profile image
Sara-J-

I know exactly how you feel Vic as I went through the same experience in November last year - I’m so sorry :-( I personally chose to let nature take its course and it did over the course of a week or two. It was painful and very very emotional. After the joy of finding out we were having a baby this was the last thing we expected. Give yourself time to grieve. It gets easier as time goes on. Sending big hugs xxx

I am so so sorry to read this. I am going through medical management at the moment but that was due to a blighted ovum (no baby). I cant imagine being at home with your situation and maybe personally would opt for management in hospital if possible. I really hope your pain will heal quickly. Sending you both lots of hugs xx

Kiedy84 profile image
Kiedy84

Hi, I am am so sorry to read this. Words cannot describe the pain you must feel. Sending all my love xx

Hope85 profile image
Hope85

So so sorry to hear this xx

Penders profile image
Penders

Oh Vic I'm so very sorry to read this. I've had both medical management and surgical so if you have any questions feel free to ask. Sending you lots of love and hugs xxxx

CatDV profile image
CatDV

Heartbreaking 😒

Sending all my lovexxx

Gillyc1 profile image
Gillyc1

Oh my love, I’m so so sorry. This is so cruel and I can’t even begin to understand how you feel. I’m sending all my love and thoughts your way xxxx

Loopielu profile image
Loopielu

Oh sweetheart. I am so so sorry to see this. Heartbroken for you. Sending so much love to you both and a gentle hug. xx

WeeMrsH profile image
WeeMrsH

Vic I don’t now what to say. I am deeply shocked and so sorry you’re going through this. Take care of you xx

Catlady2013 profile image
Catlady2013

I’m so sorry, it’s devastating. I had a miscarriage at a smiliar time frame and opted for medical management, it was very difficult. Think about what will be best for you, take time to grieve. I buried my head in the ground, didn’t attend the funeral (which the Mariposa Trust arrange, and they do fantastic work to support during and after m/c) which I really regret. You may need to ask yourself hard questions, that you don’t want to ask yourself, in order to be sure you’ll have no regrets. It is 2 years ago and I’m still not coping, I put this down to the fact I didn’t give myself the opportunity to grieve. Sorry it isn’t a more helpful reply, I’d just hope my experience may be of benefit to you. Thinking of you and your partner. I’m here if you need to talk xx

Poppy16 profile image
Poppy16

I just want to say how sorry I am to read your post. It's cruel and really unfair what has happened. I feel very sad for you and disappointed. I'm thinking about you. You are not alone at this terrible time. We are all here for you. It is extremely bewildering and difficult to know how to manage a loss in terms of treatment. I know unfortunately as have been through this 3 times. The Miscarriage Association is good at explaining options. You could check out its website and/or ring a volunteer there for advice and support. I did this with my loss last year and I found they were superb. Sending you a big hug.xo

Benita1986 profile image
Benita1986

Hi Vic, I’m so sorry to hear that πŸ˜” sending lots of love & hugs xx

Kingsley09 profile image
Kingsley09

It made me want to cry when I read your post today as my daughter has been through the same thing and I know the pain she went through it broke her heart she is pregnant again 10 wks but owing to going through the same as you last time this time has been a very hard time for her she is having a scan every two weeks this time but because of last time the day before she had them since 7 wks she is a bundle of nerves I pray to god every night that all will go well for her and as her mum I feel the pain as well so I will put you into my prayers as well there are a lot of ladies out there that have had it happen and have gone on to get pregnant again and have had beautiful full term babies that’s what my daughter is hanging onto every time she has her scan god bless you my dear xxx

JOSANDY40 profile image
JOSANDY40

Dear Vic77, I'm sad to hear this news for you. You know the answer , but it's a road to get there. So sorry. The thing is you must take the view hard as it is that there was something wrong with this embryo, it wasn't a baby yet! So it was a good thing it didn't become a baby nor you had when this was finally born you had a mentally or physically ill child and burdened. This will help you. Acceptance. My best, remember you are both well. Your love together. Think in the present and realise this is the blessing. My best wishes. J x

Sprinkles86 profile image
Sprinkles86

Oh Vic I’m so sorry to read this, I just don’t have the words.... life is too cruel. Just know I’m thinking of you and sending you the biggest hug xxxxx

ditsy999 profile image
ditsy999

im so sorry hun, my heart breaks for you. Big hugs xxx

kumkums profile image
kumkums

Oh Vic, this is really sad. I cry within me when I see such messages 😒😒😒😒😒. It is a torture, please don't stress yourself on the options you have to miscarriage management yet. Just try to get your head in a place first. I remembered when we had a mmc, my husband told the nurse not to tell us those options yet, just give us time.

I pray the Lord will comfort you, yes life indeed is cruel but it makes us stronger and come out better.

RonaG profile image
RonaG

Sending you love at such a terrible time πŸ’•πŸ’•πŸ’•

Sarahhol72 profile image
Sarahhol72

I'm so sorry to hear this life is so cruel 😞 Thinking of you and your partner at this difficult time. Xxx

Abbie40 profile image
Abbie40

Dear Vic my heart bleeds for you!! I’ve had 2 missed miscarriages and the pain is horrendous, numbing and no word is strong enough!! My husband fainted he was so shocked :( the first time we were under nhs and there was zero sympathy, just coldly given our options by a junior doctor. We opted for an erpc as there is minimal bleeding and pain and it’s over with so we could grieve and try to move on. I wish I could take this pain away from you but please know that we’re all thinking of you and sending lots of love and strength!! One thing this process does is make us stronger and so resilient!! Please be kind to yourself and each other xxxx

Squeak2 profile image
Squeak2

So sorry to read your news. Gentle hugs πŸ’• xx

ClarabGlasgow profile image
ClarabGlasgow

Oh I’m heartbroken for you so sorry to read this xx

G_H_C profile image
G_H_C

Just so sorry to hear this. No words are enough. Take care of yourself ok xx

Crowpingpongg profile image
Crowpingpongg

Oh I'm crying reading this news and feel your pain totally. I too have just gone through this at 9 weeks ours too had stopped beating. I think everything is too much to bear when they ask you how you would like to proceed with the missed miscarriage. All your hopes and dreams crash and that moment of telling everyone your wonderful news is now a distant memory. I'm so sorry for this loss. I had D&C two weeks ago today. Wasn't what I expected but it's the best for me. I have been spotting ever since and had back pain and headaches but it's nothing really than if you do natural or tablets. Go with the kindest option for you xxx

Clare_lou profile image
Clare_lou

Vic, I’m so so sorry this has happened to you. After all that you’ve been through, it’s just so incredibly cruel and unfair! My thoughts are with you xxx

Jonesjp profile image
Jonesjp

Oh hunny I’m so sad to be reading this, sending you much love x x x

lianm8 profile image
lianm8

Oh lovely I am so sorry to hear this. I am sure nothing anyone says st the moment will help but take one day at a time. This journey sometimes is truly awful. Thinking of you and your hubby xxxxx

ZessB profile image
ZessB

What sad news sweetie. Give yourself time to heal and please don’t give up hope on your dream. Sending you lost of love and strength in this difficult time xx

Heartbreaking!! Thinking of you xxx

Paris1-1 profile image
Paris1-1

This is heart breaking. So sorry to hear your sad news. Sending you lots of love xxx

Lynnr54 profile image
Lynnr54

Oh no, I’m so sorry to hear that. My heart goes out to you. Life is so cruel sometimes. Look after yourself x

Hollibob profile image
Hollibob

So so sorry. It’s truely not fair.

Somehow, after time, we get up again and start to function. If I’m honest, there’s a part of you that will stay slightly numb to the world afterwards...years down the line.

You need to do what is right for you and your other half x

Life can be so unfair. Im really sorry to hear of your loss. Sending you lots of hugs through here Xx

Oh god I’m so sorry to hear this. 😒😒😒

There are no words. But you are in my thoughts and prayers.

oharal profile image
oharal

Hi Vic, my heart bleeds for you. It's so horrific. We finally got our first bfp a few weeks ago, had a scan and all was fine then a week later (last thursday) I had another scan which showed baby's heart had stopped. I fully understand how you feel. It's so cruel and not fair. Look after yourself and please keep strong, I'm here if you need a chat with someone who going through it. Xxxx

Scarlett13 profile image
Scarlett13

No way!!!! 😒😒😒😒 I’m so so sorry Vic. This is just awful. I hope you get through it one day at a time and find strength and support in each other. Sorry you’re having to go through this, it’s absolutely devastating, I’m so feeling for you right now. Xxxx

Coracle profile image
Coracle

Just to say I am so sorry and thinking of you. So sorry after so many ivf tries, you have had your hopes raised and then this awful outcome. So so sorry. Will pray for you now before I go to bed. xxx

Mannjj43 profile image
Mannjj43

So, so sorry to read this. As you say, the pain must be immeasurable and I wish you strength and peace. Take each day as it comes and look after yourself. Xxx

Oh Vic What a cruel thing to go through.sending you lots of love and hugs .the devastation and pain is unimaginable.no words can heal at this time. Just know alot of us here are thinking of you. Hang in there.πŸ’”πŸ’”

Lucyloo81 profile image
Lucyloo81

I’m so sorry Vic I wish I had words that would help. Be kind to yourself sending you a huge hug xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Tezzabell86 profile image
Tezzabell86

I’m so sorry for your loss vic I cannot begin to understand what you are going through. Always here if you ever want to chat xxx

I'm sorry to hear that and yes life is bloody cruel and unfair.

Blondie_81 profile image
Blondie_81

Oh god I’m so so sorry for you both. I’m just devastated for you - there are no words... life is SO unfair and difficult sometimes. You’re in my thoughts sending lots of love xx

Ang24816 profile image
Ang24816

Hi Vic. I am so sorry to read this....absolutely devastated for you. Wish I could say something to help but there really is nothing other than my thoughts are with you and your partner. Xxxx

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