3rd BFN πŸ’”: I've kept myself quiet for... - Fertility Network UK

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3rd BFN πŸ’”

Gurty123 profile image
Gurty123
β€’21 Replies

I've kept myself quiet for the last few months, I didn't want to 'temp fate' by talking about my 3rd try. But yesterday I got my BFN and it's hit me the hardest this time around. I was so positive, I had given it my absolute everything and yet we still failed. This journey is so hard!! I can't face anyone or anything right now, the 'chin up' speeches are just not what I want to hear. I feel so sad and lost this time. I spent the last 2 weeks (and time before that) truly believing this was our time. I had a scratch, embryoglue, acupuncture and a top grade embryo transferred and my womb lining was above 8mm and it STILL didn't work! πŸ˜₯ xx

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Gurty123 profile image
Gurty123
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21 Replies
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sanj76 profile image
sanj76

I’m so so so sorry to read this Gurty.... easier said then done I know but we are all here to support you. Just take it easy and look after yourself ok

Gurty123 profile image
Gurty123β€’ in reply tosanj76

Thank you Sanj. Congratulations on the birth of your little miracle too ❀️

sanj76 profile image
sanj76β€’ in reply toGurty123

Much appreciated Gurty

Tugsgirl profile image
Tugsgirl

I’m so sorry xx

Penders profile image
Penders

I am really sorry to read this. Big hugs xx

So sorry to hear this . Sending huge hugs xx

Gurty123 profile image
Gurty123

Thank you! I have my follow up on the 28th Nov so I have to try and get positive again xx

SJA14 profile image
SJA14

So sorry, it really is such a tough journey. Look after yourself xx

Gurty123 profile image
Gurty123β€’ in reply toSJA14

It really is! It certainly takes its toll on you doesn't it. I have to carry on and get strong again! Thank you for your message xx

Lizzielizzielizzie profile image
Lizzielizzielizzieβ€’ in reply toGurty123

Grief is part of the process of getting strong again- make sure you allow yourself to grieve in the way that’s right for you xxx

ICSIBaby86 profile image
ICSIBaby86

I'm so so sorry to hear this ... I also had my 3rd BFN last month. It's crushing ! πŸ˜₯ ... we put so much effort, emotion and money into this process then to have it ripped from underneath our feet is just cruel. As you say with the chin up comments, I just needed people to accept my pain, I didn't want to hear it will be fine, or try again there's next time. I wanted people to acknowledge how sad and helpless i felt. A month on I feel better but it's left a mark on me. I'm just taking it day by day, week by week. If I have a crying pj day I just go for it now. I found it important to rest and sometimes let the grief consume me, I had to mourn because for me it is a loss. 3 times this year I've prepared myself for a baby that is not coming and like every assumed future or loss it will be grieved. I hope you feel better soon, take care of yourself ❀️

Gurty123 profile image
Gurty123β€’ in reply toICSIBaby86

I am so sorry to hear you have also had 3 BFN's! It's so sad, and like you say, the only way I can describe the feeling is as grieving for a loss. I feel empty. Everyone seems to think that because there is a 'next time' you'll be ok, just give it another go....like it's so simple. I feel for you Hun, it's good to hear that a month on you are feeling better but it still never leaves us does it. Sending you a big hug and some strength for whatever your choices are for your path moving forward 🌈❀️

Missy_22 profile image
Missy_22

I’m so sorry this journey is the hardest ever we are all here for you xxxx

Gurty123 profile image
Gurty123β€’ in reply toMissy_22

Thank you Missy that's so kind of you. I've started my bleed so I'm feeling even more sorry for myself but I'm off for lunch with my sister-in-law today to try and cheer me up and take my mind off things xxx

Loopielu profile image
Loopielu

Oh bless you. So sorry to see this. I’ve had mine today but I’d tested a few days ago and made my peace that it wouldn’t be our time again. It’s so hard. Sending loads of love xx

Gurty123 profile image
Gurty123β€’ in reply toLoopielu

Oh Loopielu I am so so sorry to hear that too. It is so tough, we pray for that positive test and it's so crushing when it isn't. Sending you a huge hug and lots of love ❀️ it's so unfair xx

Amanda86 profile image
Amanda86

So sorry to read this πŸ™ Xxx

Gurty123 profile image
Gurty123β€’ in reply toAmanda86

Thank you Amanda xxx

E_05 profile image
E_05

So sorry to read this, it really is so unfair. Take care of yourself xx

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5

Im so sorry! Thinking of you!xx

Gurty123 profile image
Gurty123

Thank you. I thought I was doing Ok but today I just don't know. Can't seem to shift it at all this time....πŸ˜” xx

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