Give me strength!

So today I started my IVF and my sister who I am not very close with and is in and out of relationships all the time and now has been with some fella of questionable character for a few months, announced today she is 6 weeks preggo with her first which will also be our family's first grandchild.

Now usually I'm happy for others news it doesn't affect me because everyone's journey is their own -but man if there was ever a couple who don't deserve to "just oops fall preggo" it's them!!

What a f***ing joke!

Rant over I know most of you won't judge my anger on this today! And I love you for that!

45 Replies

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  • na no judging! Id feel that same!!xxx

  • Did I mention he already has 3 kids with someone else he hardly sees jeez!

  • Jeez, there is no justice in this world! 😑

  • No there is not I'm fuming 😀 I know my situation is my situation either way but for the next hour at least I'm going to wallow in pure anger!

  • So unfair and defo no judging x

  • definitely no judgement here. You're entitled to be as angry as you like. That's sadly the injustice of this world. Be safe in the knowledge that hopefully you and your partner will make greater parents one day. I've lost count over the amount of times I've become angry over my bro in law who has 3 kids to 3 different women, 2 of whom he's not allowed to see for various reasons, been on Jeremy Kyle, in trouble with the law, you know the type. It's so wrong isn't it but try, hard though it may be, to not let it consume you. Hugs xx

  • Sooo annoying :( life isnt fair xx

  • I'm with you and definitely don't judge! Big hugs to you xx

  • Absolutely no judgement. I can see why you're hurting. Just take a breath though and think about whether her situation is what you would want, really. Your sister could be in for some tough times ahead as could her future child. Whilst it is desperately unfair that she has conceived at the drop of a hat, she has done so to someone who may not be reliable or supportive. I can't go through the rollercoaster of ivf without my hubby by my side so motherhood would be incredibly hard without his unwavering support. Sending you a big hug. xxx

  • You're very right yes that is what I think I wouldn't want to be in her shoes at all.

    Ill be no more or less pregnant whatever she gets up to - it's just the injustice the timing that it's them etc etc

  • I know. It's very frustrating. I truly believe we are sent difficult times for a reason even if we cannot see that reason at all. These times will make us stronger, wiser and more compassionate towards others. This is what I tell myself when I struggle to get out of bed at the moment because I feel so sick and have a pounding head. I'm trying to believe my own hype. xxx

  • Hahaha wise words I just want you to yell severe swear words in no particular order.

  • I want to yell them not you tell them lol soz

  • Yell ffs

  • Oh god I know how you feel! Ive had 3 pregnancy announcement recently and had a good old rant on here too! Not judging at all, we all know how unfair it all seems when you are set up and able to provide and care for a child yet others not even remotely in that situation seem to be able to fall at the drop of a hat! Rant away, mine made me feel much better!xx

  • Infuriating!!!With no disrespect to your sister, it's stuff like this that makes me want to cry into buckets for days at how unfair it all is. You are totally justified in your reaction...how depressing!

    Your time will come hun...and what a wonderful mum you'll be. Hang in there xx

  • Oh I have total disrespect for her don't worry about that! We have put ourselves in the best position we can be in t have a child they are far from that and boom simple as peas for those folks as it always is hey! Others announcements I'm fine with it's that it's my sister and all that comes with that. 😑

  • No judgement here. I'd be the same πŸ˜• xx

  • Sorry to hear this news - no judgement from me. I don't know who decides who gets the baby dust but they certainly haven't given it out fairly today. Xxx

  • no judging here! WTF?! x

  • Rant away hunny 😑😑😑😑 x x x

  • Definitely no judgement from me either, totally get why your so angry- how fucking unfair is all I can say! I've had similar from my sister in law in terms of it being so easy so get slightly how your feeling.

    Hang in there x

  • You're not the only one to feel this way.

    I've been struggling ttc for three years and just completed my first ivf cycle ( currently waiting to test to see if it was successful )

    Every time a friend or cousin became pregnant I had a lot of resentment and didn't feel bad about it. It's because we're human.

    And I suppose it's just because we want this so much.

    Stay strong and stay dignified.

    Sending loads of hugs and baby dust to you.

    Best of luck on your cycle xxx 😍😍

  • Totally understand - life is pretty is very unfair at times. Ive just started my ivf today too. Good luck xx

  • I have to admit I kind of felt the same when my 14 year old Niece accidentally (on purpose) fell pregnant. She was so excited she even asked for a baby shower and was thrilled to be able to drop out of school. My family were running around after her and knitting for the baby etc etc and I was quietly horrified. Needless to say the poor child certainly wasn't going to be raised in a nice environment.

    I myself know our child will be raised in a stable, loving and mature environment. You should really pity your Sister, it certainly doesn't sound like a great start for an innocent child.

    Thankfully I estranged myself from my family (I use the word loosely) years ago!

  • Oh god yes I can see how you you feel that's just incredible!

  • Keep your chin up. Don't give up hope. And when you get your beautiful baby it will all be worth it.

    I start my first cycle of Clomid today.

    Never give up! (As my awesome hubby says)!

  • Aw it's a nightmare if you look at all our past post you'll see we've all had a major rant somewhere down the line lol. Just remember your baby will be extra special that's all that matters try not to stress cause you want to be as calm as can be on your journey. We are all so understanding I wish I could stay on this forum forever lol I get more support from these ladies/men than I've ever had. Keep your chin up hun 😘😘

  • Also my sister has just given birth to her 6th boy/ my brother fiancΓ© is pregnant with second and my best and only friend is pregnant with her second lol xx

  • Oh wow yeah true! TBH yesterday I got sick of it all this was the last straw my mums known about my journey for two years and whilst we haven't hugely planned the the future for what if - I had scoped some things out like childcare via my mum and she's spoke of retiring and I think she was a little excited that we have gone for IVF - I almost backed out and half felt I'd let my hubby and mum down, and she's never said she wants a grandchild but literally the other day when I asked her if she really would be happy about it, she said she would love to do all the things she didn't get to do with us! And on the odd occasion I've spotted a nice outfit and said maybe one day we will be doing this kind of shopping.

    And literally on the day I start IVF my sister announced that and boom she's snatched all of the above from me in one fell swoop (or so it seems) and as there are no grandkids at all currently in our family she's will snatch that too.

    Like if we had done IVF and it was over and we knew either way fine but the timing is just typical - even around my wedding she caused issues to get the attention back onto her it's something I've had with her all my life.

  • More than ever now I'm sorted over this IVF invasion on my life I feel like I've stopped being fun I've stopped being me and it's all "what if we have a baby?" that dominates every decision and yesterday and still today I'm very close to shutting all this down and walking away from it it and taking back control of my life and getting the old me back that was so much happier before I came off the pill and started with this!

  • *sort of

  • Grrrr so unfair! 😠

  • You're not alone. Totally understand the anger that comes from so much pain. Rant away. We've all felt similarly at some point.

    Maybe, and I certainly am not suggesting you here, will persuade her that it's not the right path?

    Sending hugs x

  • Well social services will be involved from day one cause of his convictions for violence he's been in prison for 5 years she's just met him and thinks she can "fix" him as she does time and again - we are all fed up of her reckless behaviour that impacts the family and the last guy last year also exprisoner threatened our family.

    If she thinks having a kid in her situation is good then she can crack on but why it has to occur now of all times I dunno why she didn't at least wait to see if this guy even worked out for more than five minutes! They all last a year at a time it always ends in drama and now she's throwing a kid in the mix and it's just a joke!

  • I'm sorry but it's people like that who should have to go through because they wouldn't last five mins and wouldn't get past the bloody child safety vetting process either! As we all know it's unfair!

  • God that sounds terrible. You've obviously had lots of past dealings with it all and you're right you and your family totally shouldn't have to support her continued bad decisions. You deserve all the love and support right now. We're here for you any way we can help x

  • I definitely get how you feel! I am always happy for others as I feel everyone's journey is their own... But when a family

    Member got pregnant 'by accident' within 6 months of being together I was fuming- not just at the injustice but at the stupidity of people who in this day and age don't seem to realise the basics of the bird and the bees! "I didn't know you could fall pregnant so easily..." Sigh- if only

  • Yep it's just crap isn't it!

  • Lol u made me laugh xx I'm glad we think alike

  • I'm just one of those people who thinks what I say lol I feel a tad guilty today for thinking this but then I think nah f**k it I've earnt my right to feel pissed off 😀 hahaha I won't wallow in it - I blow off steam and move on - the only saving grace is they are moving away whoop whoop!! Get sodding moved I say see ya πŸ‘‹

  • Or say what I think even hahaha I'm blaming the drugs now

  • No judgement from me either...

    Why is it the ones closest to us always hurt the most?

    I had a similar thing although was someone I work closely with so not related but back when we started our journey pregnancy was not on the agenda they wanted their own house and were looking st getting married then all of a sudden two weeks ago they announce "we're pregnant" I was absolutely gutted.

    So I know exactly how it feels and how unfair it seems. I had a rant here had a cry and then went, right let's relax and focus on us...

    Hope things go well for you sending hugs and baby dust x

  • lol i'm part of Social services, i will get a referral going lol

  • Hahaha

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