Start of 2ww

Had transfer today. Wish I felt more positive. Only 6 cell, but now grade 2 from a one as some fragmentation present which has worried me slightly. The embryologist said not to worry about it as some fragmentation can be normal and at least today it has divided as it should, so I'm really really trying to be positive and hopeful. Just so very hard knowing our outcome last time with technically the same and better results than this time. It's kind of our last chance, for a significant amount of time at least so not working scares the hell out of me.

Been getting weird tummy pains since I got out of the hospital, nothing terrible, just every pain I'm acutely aware of. Sorry, just needed to get it off my chest. Praying to any god who will listen right now

34 Replies

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  • Wishing you all the luck in the world xx

  • Thank you poochi, you too. How's the drugs going?

  • They're going ok so far. Just hoping for good news Tuesday. im keeping everything crossed for you xx

  • As I will be for you hun. Rest up xxx

  • Good luck x

  • Thank you crazy_cat, how you feeling?

  • Stressed... but trying to put Monday at the back of my mind and keep relaxed, will be glad when it's over if that makes sense.

    I hope your 2 week wait goes well and you get your positive result .

    Everything crossed for you xx

  • Oh bless you yes it is stressful isn't it. I've cried 3 times already. Scared of doing anything that might "disturb" our little embie. I have the strangest feeling now it's in there it will now what to do, but the fear that it won't is overwhelming. Watching lots of happy films to try distract myself. Will be thinking of you Monday xxx

  • Thank you 😊.

    Xx

  • Good luck..! Hope for the best :-)

  • Thank you hun! Hope you're doing ok xx

  • Yeah.. sort of OK after all I have being through last couple of days. Drs decided last minute that there is a possibility for me to ended up in OHSS and yep it was correct. I was so much pain after my EC, then having to experience all bloating and pain from the enlarged ovaries pushing all other organs away was a complete disaster. To top that one up my blood results from yesterday came back as bad kidney function. Luckily today's scan and blood showed less abdominal fluid and kidney has decided to calm down. I am trying my best to deal with this, but struggling with so much with pain, can't even sleep let alone walking or do anything. Seems my embies don't like the mother at all, only 13 got fertilized after 19 collection, but now only 4 made it to day 3. I am so afraid that there will be nothing to freeze by Monday as embryologist told one of them doesn't look good either. Every bit inside is panicking, but nothing I can do. I have no idea why things are always go wrong with me. Not a single good news. Sorry for ranting on your good day... you deserve the best.. XX

  • Honey, you bloody rant away!! I'm so so gutted for you and will be praying your little ones become great little frosties! I can only imagine the pain, I was close to ohss last time, the op was hideously painful, had to tell people I had a bad back as a cover. I sometimes wonder if my body had settled better before transfer, if the pregnancy hormones hadn't have made my ovaries continue to grow so much, maybe Annabelle would have implanted better and may prevented the abruption, but of course just my silly mind making what if's again that can never be answered. I understand how these next few days especially will stress you out, with my just one collected I've been freaking out as to if it will fertilise, if it will survive the night and it's quality dropping. But as you say, nothing I can do now other than pray and hope that my little embie knows what to do and my body doesn't fail me (even though supposedly nothing medically wrong with me).

    Be gentle on yourself, lots and lots of rest and hugs to you xx

  • Did you hear from the clinic today hope16? Been thinking of you xx

  • Thanks for the thoughts love. I don't even know where to begin. Blood came back OK on Sunday, but still they see little fluid in the abdomen. However they decided to go ahead with the transfer on Monday (only 2 embies survived out of 19 eggs). Monday morning more tests and scan, put me on high risk group along with heparin injections and counting of fluid in and out of body. When the dr asked me whether I am OK to transfer I was so confused, I am no mean of ready as I still heavily suffer from symptoms, so already knew chances are next to nothing for getting pregnant, but I couldn't say no as for the first time my husband talk about the baby last couple of days. He remained very closed mouth about baby for the whole process, but was there all every one of appointment with me. But for the first time, his joy came out of his mouth saying "if you get pregnant this time I can share the B'day month with her (he loves girls)". I know how much he loves babies, specially my 3 nieces, not a single week pass by with out him talking to them. I think he kept quiet all this time hiding his desire to have a child mainly not to hurt my feelings. So I ended up in saying yes to Dr for the transfer. So far I don't feel anything other than my OHSS symptoms, bizarre.. I still have hope, as I got one precious baby freezing in a fridge somewhere in the hospital. I stayed completely away from anything including the forum yesterday and day before entirely because I knew if I read more I wouldn't be able to do the transfer. This is so bizarre as I thought OHSS is common to people who are young (which I am not, already 35) and got high AMH (mine was 20, no way near high) and I was on the lowest dose of stimulation. So everything had to go wrong, I developed that. Enough of me, how are you coping the pressure? Relax.. That is all we can do. I can't even go for a walk today as it is horrible outside, hopefully weather in your area is not bad as this. Lots of love..!! <3

  • Weather is cold and now raining lol, but did manage a nice walk today. Our transfer was Monday, clinic said take it easy for 2-3, so maybe not the worst thing that you're not up to much today hun lol. Bless you, I know what you mean about getting the unexpected. My amh is 24+, I'm not quite 35 and cycles relatively regular, hormone levels ok, got 13 eggs last time, 10 matured, only two survived to day 3, but they never mentioned my egg quality as a reason as all fertilised were grade two with only minor fragmentation, so we assumed (I know, should have asked 😢). So this time they said swapping to menopur to get more and slightly better quality only to give us more chances, basically so if first didn't work or loss again, we'd be able to try a fet. However, I didn't seem to react well to menopur the way most women do, I didn't get as bloated and sore as last time, and out of 15 follicles they only got one egg, which was growing slowly. It's like everything they assumed went out the window! Like you, all I can do now is hope and pray it works and our little bean sticks around for us.

    Rest up lots, drink loads of water (I'm having about 4 litres to stop constipation from those bloody pessaries lol), and lots of hugs with hubby Xxxxx

  • Wish you a very good luck Hun ! Xx

  • Thank you babyhope. Hoping you're doing ok xx

  • Thinking of you, wishing you lots of luck!! xx

  • You too WeeMrsH! Thank you hun. Have you had your fet yet?

  • No not yet, still a way to go. I have a scan on Weds to check the lining of my womb, with transfer pencilled in for wc 1st Feb. Try to relax and envisage your wee embie making itself at home in there :) xx

  • Good luck! You know all this already but Just try and relax over the next couple of weeks, don't do anything that will overexert yourself and go for a few walks (though wrap up warm on this weather!). We'll all be hoping for the best x

  • I know it is really hard, but try and be positive. I truly believe this helps. I had 2 cycles and ended up with only 2 embryos, both fragmented. I am currently sitting with my 5 week old son showing it is possible. Stay strong and I hope you get the outcome you want. X

  • Congratulations and thank you! I can't thank you all enough for giving me a little bit more hope with your positive experiences! I pray to god in 38 give or take weeks I'll be in the same position as you! Xxx

  • Good luck! x

  • Thank you hopeful1982, hope you're feeling ok xx

  • Wishing you lots of luck @parentsofangels . Try to distract yourself by doing things you enjoy. Go for walks, see friends, have a nice meal. .. anything that you can take some pleasure in. I know it's easier said than done but you need to be positive. You have got an egg that has fertilised and developed into an embryo and is still developing. It's a little fighter and it only takes one egg to have a baby. Keep thinking positive vibes, your little embie will pick up on these.... wishing you all the luck in the world, you deserve it. Xxx

  • Thank you, as you say easier said than done, just wish it didn't take so long, and wish I didn't have these tummy pains, nothing excruciating or anything, not concerned of ohss or anything, just it's a worry isn't it when you want everything in there to be all calm and serene.

    Xx

  • Absolutely hun, so much easier said than done. Keeping all my fingers and toes crossed for you and sending you positivity x

  • Thanks hun xxx

  • Wishing you all the luck. I'm on 2ww and I too am noticing every twinge! Not sure if it will help you but I downloaded a relaxation cd from zita west website. It's designed for people going through ivf and has really helped me relax and think positively. It's about £9 so might be worth a go. Xx

  • Oh thank you Lamb82, I'll have a look at that. At the point where I'll try bloody anything lol. I'm so scared. The weird little pains are putting me on edge, hearing of people believing those twinges are "implanting" or just the womb and ovaries healing, or something not so good. I'm not getting the hard sharp pains I got after the collection, and I haven't got the chronic back ache I had lap time either, and sometimes it's quite obvious it's just ovarian pain, mainly on the left side which is surprising as that was it smaller where there was no eggs and only 2 follicles, but sometimes there is still that mild pain or aching more centrally low down which worrys me more. The fact no one can tell me what it is or if it's working, and I'm powerless for another 10days is driving me crazy! When's your test date?

  • Well I hope it helps. Like you I figure chucking everything including the kitchen sink at this is worth a go, even if just to keep me sane! I also decided to think the twinges are good, at least something is going on in there!! Hopefully for us all I'm right!!! Test say on 1st Feb. Let's hope this is a Monday morning that I will enjoy!! How long until your test? I'll be crossing my fingers for you. X

  • I'm feeling quite uncomfortable tonight, not pain, but uncomfortable especially when I need to pee!

    Think that's the progesterone bloating me and of course healing from op/stims still ongoing. Test date for me is 3rd and feels a million miles away!! Xxx

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