Nervous about IVF...: Hi! just looking... - Fertility Network UK

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Nervous about IVF...

Madge9 profile image
17 Replies

Hi!

just looking for a bit of advice/encouragement!

We are just going through fertility investigations... All tests have come back within normal limits which we are very grateful for (hubby is over the moon his 'test' passed with flying (literally) colours!)

But despite this we are being advised to have IVF. We were offered IUI and IVF but the registrar feels IVF would be the best chance.

I cant help but feel a little sad and overwhelmed with the prospect of IVF...

I had a very early miscarraige last year, where my hormones didn't rise properly (I was having blood tests for something else at the time and they confirmed the pregnancy but also that it wasn't likely to progress...)

Has anyone else had a similar experience where they have unexplained fertility and had the choice of IUI or IVF?

thanks x

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Madge9
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17 Replies
Anjel2 profile image
Anjel2

Hi,

We have unexplained infertility and I thought we would be offered IUI but wasn't, the consultant decided to go straight for IVF. I believe this was probably down to my age (I'm 38) and IVF has a better success rate than IUI. It's very overwhelming but the consultants are specialists who deal with infertility on a daily basis so if they have recommended IVF I would go with it. Look at IVF as a gift, it's an opportunity at increasing your chances of having baby and that's what matters.

I'm currently going through my first cycle of IVF and although surreal and an emotional rollercoaster it's not as bad as I imagined it to be. For the first time in a long while I actually feel that I am doing something very positive on our journey to conceive. I'm aware that it may not work, but I feel that it will give us our very best chance and that's what I am holding onto.

Good luck on your journey xx

Madge9 profile image
Madge9 in reply toAnjel2

Thank you so much.

I was just worried about hormones and all the injections and drugs. I only take paracetamol if I really have to!

You hear so many stories about IVF and just hearing friends and families reactions alarmed me a little. My best friend even said my god why dont you just keep trying. I think 4 years is long enough! You kind of get tired of trying don't you and the disappointment is just heartbreaking each month.

Feeling a little excited now so thank you! They've told us we should start our 1st cycle within 2-3 mths... like you say it is a gift and one was are most grateful for.

Good luck with your cycle. Hope its a positive result for you =) xx

Hopeful1982 profile image
Hopeful1982

Hello Madge9,

We also have unexplained fertility and after 2.5 years of ttc have just finished our first IVF cycle.

After we had our initial tests/fertility assessment I was so relieved that nothing was wrong but, that quickly turned to frustration as I couldn't understand why we couldn't conceive when it was happening so easily for 'everyone' else!

I was desperate to start IVF as I wanted to 'fix' how awful I felt and saw this as the solution. But, when the time came to start treatment I wasn't sure whether it was the right thing to do. I realised (thanks to one of the lovely ladies on here) that, like all women, I wanted to conceive naturally. I didn't want to have IVF. No one does. It's just not how we imagined it all happening. But, after 2 years it hadn't happened and for me it was time to accept we needed that little bit of extra help to get to where we wanted to be.

I also didn't find IVF half as difficult as I expected it to be. I think I was just grateful to get off the merry-go-round of ttc every month and make it someone else's problem! The process is very surreal and I just couldn't get my head around how it could all end in a pregnancy! There's no denying there are a lot of drugs to take but you quickly get into a routine and our whole treatment only took 7 weeks from start to finish so in the scheme of things it really isn't long.

Good luck whatever you decide to do x

Madge9 profile image
Madge9 in reply toHopeful1982

Thank you. I think it probably is more frustration. Some of my friends have managed to have 2 babies naturally in the time we've been trying! One has had 3 (twins +1)

I feel pretty impatient about going for IVF now. 7 weeks doesn't sound too bad in the scheme of things =)

X

Hopeful1982 profile image
Hopeful1982 in reply toMadge9

I know that feeling well! I know quite a few people who will have had two in the time we've been trying x

Walp73 profile image
Walp73 in reply toHopeful1982

Yip... Me too! So frustrating

WeeMrsH profile image
WeeMrsH

We have unexplained infertility and have also been recommended IVF, IUI was never mentioned. We've had one cycle already. It's tough but not as bad as you might imagine. Good luck x

Madge9 profile image
Madge9 in reply toWeeMrsH

Thank you. Fingers crossed =)

X

Yarwoody profile image
Yarwoody

Hi Madge9

I can only agree with all of the above comments!

It's a strange feeling accepting that assisted fertility is the route you'll have to follow! I'm 38 & all of my closest friends have growing families, so it was devastating when we also had a miscarriage 2years ago. You live in hope that next month it'll be your 'turn' & deal with the disappointment each time your period starts! I found it a little hard to accept that IVF was the route we'd have to take especially as, like you, our situation is also unexplained. The journey when it starts though is actually quite exciting & each stage, filled with anticipation and hope, isn't nearly as difficult as you might expect! (even the injections are a doddle!)

The wealth of advice and support on here is invaluable so make sure you take advantage of it! Good luck & best wishes xxx

Madge9 profile image
Madge9 in reply toYarwoody

Thank you. I think it is just accepting it's whats needed to give us the chance of our own family. I didnt quite envisage petree dishes and sedation in conception! Ha.

I'm glad I have found this site! My friends that have struggled all conceived naturally in the end so it's to hear of people going through what we are going through, and appreciating it's not easy!

I look forward to our new journey now.

X

Walp73 profile image
Walp73

Hi

Your hesitance is understandable... But go for it!!

I've been TTC for 3 yrs and during that time had 3 early miscarriages, 1 of which was twins. It took me to have 3 consequitive mcs before even being considered for referral to fertility consultant... And now at 41 am too old to be offered either iui or ivf.

Jump at your chance ☺

Madge9 profile image
Madge9 in reply toWalp73

Bless you im so sorry to hear that. We are very grateful for our chance. Are IUI and IVF the only would be options? This is all new territory for me =/.

I feel terrible for getting low about it knowing what others are going through. X

Walp73 profile image
Walp73 in reply toMadge9

Don't ever feel terrible...we all have questions, hesitance, down days etc etc... Lots on this site will have gone through what's happening with you... They all seem great and supportive. Am sure you'll get lots of support, advice and encouragement from those who know the process xx

Look forward to updates on how your journey goes ☺☺

BabyHope profile image
BabyHope

Hi Madge9,

We are trying for baby from last 3 year without any success. Now have been referred directly for IVF because we have unexplained Infertility. Just waiting for consent forms for NHS funding. I just can't wait to start my first IVF cycle, not sure though what would be the waiting list. :-)

Good Luck!!

Madge9 profile image
Madge9 in reply toBabyHope

Thanks. We've been trying for just under 4 years. Had an early miscarraige last year in May but nothing else. (It was very early and could have easily been missed)

We are remaining hopeful due to having unexplained infertility..

Good luck to you, hope the waits not too long!

X

Littlemoon profile image
Littlemoon

Hi Madge9,

I'm in a slightly similar situation and am too very new to this site. We have been trying for 3 years and none of the tests have found any problems. We have just been told we have funding but I feel like I don't know anything about it all really. Not even sure of the difference between IVF and IUI!!

I've only spoken to a few people about what we've been going through so I'm really pleased to have found this site where I can talk to people who know what it's like. I share your feelings of sadness and being overwhelmed!!

Best of luck x

Madge9 profile image
Madge9 in reply toLittlemoon

Hi! I know exactly how you feel. We've just been moved to another fertility unit now as we couldn't get funding (GP should never have referred us in the 1st place...sigh!)

Had our 1st appt with consultant at new clinic and feel so much better and more informed. We were given leaflets and our consultant explained everything in detail. We've even changed our minds about IVF and are going to try IUI first. She said as ours is unexplained and I'm still young that it's worth a try rather than going straight into IVF as it's pretty intense compared with IUI (due to the sedation/daily injections etc). Plus she said after the initial 4-6 wk wait for IUI we can start on my next cycle =).

Make sure you write down any questions you have and ask for leaflets comparing both.

Good luck =)

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