My life

[Lucy26]

So in one picture this is my life.... From the day I met my husband 14 years ago to this very day!!! The last symbol is an angel praying.... This represents our chemical pregnancy this week as I desperately want to move on & look to the future but just can't forget the heartache.... This was our "bumpy" (this was our embryos name due to the bumpy ride & wanting a bumpy so badly!!!) will not be forgotten!! good luck to everyone on their journey & i hope no one else has to experience this sad journey & gets positive results thinking of you all!!! 🙏😘 x x x

[MrsDx]

Oh Lucy, your bracelet is beautiful Hun. Thinking of you. Throughout this tough and emotional journey people keep telling me 'this stuff only happens to those who can cope'! Stay strong and happy and enjoy your lovely family xx

[Lucy26]

I feel happier now I can put it to rest with this new charm. Was hoping it would have been a different charm but as you say.... I can cope didn't think I could but I feel stronger everyday. How are you doing Hun? X x x

[Little3535]

Aww so sorry Hun xx don't give up xx

Thinking of you xx

[noodles_]

Aw that's beautiful Lucy26 💓 ... As each day goes by we get stronger and closer to our next opportunity on this roller coaster ivf/icsi journey. I can't wait to try again but I won't forget what I've been through and I know you won't either x x

[Lucy26]

Thanks noodles how you feeling?i have had such a Clear out.... I've written a diary of the journey of Ivf / icsi I've been on, I'm going to put my embryo picture into this book so I still have it but not in my face, I've have removed pictures from my phone, changed my bedding and generAlly starting a fresh & very much looking forward to my frozen cycle!!!! I'm not telling any of my friends or family next time!!! I just don't wNt the extra pressure!!! X x x

[noodles_ in reply to Lucy26]

Aw I'm doing okay thanks. I know exactly how you feel. I've still got my wee photo in its frame but I'll need to put it away in my wee memory box. I don't think we'll tell anyone either when we do our frozen cycle. Like you say it's too much pressure and the more people that know the harder it is. We hardly told anyone but even at that I found it hard telling them the bad news. The diary is a lovely idea. I kept a kinda log during treatment but it was more a record of how I was feeling & what symptoms I was having. Hopefully it won't be too long before we can both try again 😊 x x

[Music1]

Isn't it strange how our life can be summed up in a Pandora charm bracelet. A journey of our life. It made me think how mine is missing that 'baby carriage' or teddy bear as well. It's the only thing that's missing that I really want more than anything. For my birthday my partner bought me a 'dog charm' as we both love dogs, but don't have one, because we want a baby first. I made him take it back and exchange it for some 'turtle doves' because I didn't want to tempt fate. Wondering now if I too should get an angel. It's a lovely thought. Wishing you and everyone else all the best with your journey. Your bracelet and charm is beautiful x

[Lucy26 in reply to Music1]

Ah Hun!!! Tis was my wedding prezzie from my husband when we got married.... This is how my journey has gone, this is what my chamilia bracelet represents.....

-I met my SOULMATE

-MY colour is pink

-We moved in together our HOUSE

-We have TWO CATS

-We got ENGAGED

-we had the best WEDDING

- DREAMS REALLY DO COME TRUE

- I became mrs IRELAND

- he said "I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU MORE"

- PINK was our wedding colour

- I got PREGNANT & had our baby

-it was our 1 year ANNIVERSARY

- I was a MUM

- she is MY DAUGHTER - MY FRIEND

- she's called PHOEBE

- I always knew "CHILDREN ARE BLESSINGS!!"

- we couldn't get pregant so got our GOLDEN RETREIVER PUPPY

- finally we had IVF & our ANGEL was not meant to be!!!

My next charm will be HOPE!!!!

I will not give up!!!! It all happens for a reason!!!! Believe girls it will happen!!! X x x

[Music1 in reply to Lucy26]

You bought me to tears. I think you're so blessed you have your daughter, your best friend phoebe. I did notice your 'daughter' charm on your bracelet but I didn't want to ask. It could have been a charm that your mum bought for you maybe. We're still hoping for our second attempt at IVF in the summer. Our angel wasn't meant to be even though we got so close - one egg and egg transfer although they didn't hatch. It broke my heart. Thank you for your story and HOPE to all. x

[Little3535]

Wow sometimes I read things on here that really do bring a tear to my eye xx good luck each and everyone of us xx

[Lucy26 in reply to Little3535]

Don't give up!!! Your time will come!!! X x x

[Lucy26]

Music1 I wish you all the success in the world I really do!!!!! I am so so blessed to have my daughter & I worship the groud she walks on. She is my everything!!! She is the reason we want this so much, she is the reason we haven't given up, she is the reason we got our puppy!!! I am one of 5 children I want her to have what I had, my husband and I have so much love to give, I don't want my daughter feeling so pressured as she grows up because believe me I don't let this little girl out of my sight!!!! I can't help it I can't emphasise to people enough what others go to to get to just one child, it hurts me so much seeing others falling so naturally and yet I was one of these people! Although even then before we knew we had fertility problems I thanked my luck stars every day and still do!!!! X x x x

[TwoBlueLines1504]

I am really sorry that you have had to go through this grief. I really hope that your daughter gets a sibling, but she is obviously such a loved child.

We are currently going through our 5th ICSI attempt. We had a BFP with our first try, but unfortunately did not progress beyond six weeks. It was the hardest thing I have ever gone through. I didn't realise till reading this site how many of us have gone through the same thing. I think your charm bracelet is a beautiful idea. Keep up the Hope.

[Lucy26]

Ive got so many mixed emotions and have no idea what this chemical pregnancy means.... Could be a good think knowing my body can accept embryo but the other half of me is thinking how many times realistic can I put myself through this pain. This forum really keeps me going and in my heart I honestly feel it will happen for me one day I just don't know when!!! I feel for you 5 times is too much heartache!!! I know people think I have a child already but it's still the same pain it just makes the recovery process easier because I already have her. being told I may never have children again is such a blow, in the past year my world had been blown apart. I constantly get asked when am I having another baby.... It's heartbreaking having to answer. & because I have her I don't even get any help off the nhs for treatment so I also have all the guilt of am I doing the right thing spending all our savings on treatment rather than saving it for her future!!! I wish this process was easier to know predict!!! X x x how do you decide enough is enough???? X x x

[Little3535]

I think of you want something so badly enough is never enough xx I know you've got one child already but Louie body clock is ticking for another baby xx and of course it's just as heartbreaking for you having another child doesn't make it any easier on you xx

I hate getting getting asked when I'm gonna have a baby I haven't explained my situation to anybody other than my mum and best friend because it's hard enough to explain to them how I feel let alone more people xx to think that you only get help once form the nhs or in your case none is a bit unfair xx but the allow people to have children go into care and have more children yet that must have a costly effect on the nhs because labour drugs cost a small fortune xx

[MimiSvet]

Such a beautiful bracelet and the concept behind it - feel for you darling, hope you are allright

[Ohgdld]

Hey! I have a healthy baby boy who is 9 months old now! He's absolutely beautiful and has changed our world! Love them both so much. He was also a natural conception after my husband had an op for low sperm count and it was successful! Hope this gives others hope x x x don't give up on your hopes and dreams x x