I few days ago I found out that my sister in-law is pregnant again. I’m usually ok with pregnancy announcements as I’m happy for the people I love to be blessed with a baby and I wouldn’t wish what I’m going through on any of my friends and family but this one has upset me for some reason.
My brother in law has never been very grateful to be a dad and moans to my hubby that he’s not ready and feels trapped. Also it took them almost two years to get pregnant the first time and they were on the verge of getting a fertility referral but he refused to stop smoking or do any samples saying “it’s not going to be a problem with me.” This made me so angry as my hubby has a male factor problem, so what makes him think he’s so special that it couldn’t happen to him!
As well as this we’ve had a few pitying calls from family along the lines of “are you ok with the news” I can just tell they are doing the head tilt and the commiserative look – do you know the one I mean? I just hate the pity and people thinking they need to walk on egg shells around us.
I feel so conflicted. I hate the fact that I’m not happy for them, what an awful thing to think! But I just can’t help feeling sad about yet another family baby announcement.
Sorry for the rant. I have very few friends that are childless now I don’t really have many people I can talk to about how I feel. xx