Fertility Network UK

Hard period to get through

Hey ladies

It's been a rough period to get through this time of year after having a negative attempt without answers. Thought I was partly over This pain bit seeing all these new borns, then pregnant women every where hit me hard:( went shopping yesterday and saw all these baby clothes I couldn't shop much after that. I know it's silly just thought I would write as it has been on my.mind and the support on here is fab:)

Meant to be going again next year but the defeat is setting and and we have to pay for it again cos hubby has a daughter from another. The appeal was unsuccessful.

Just feeling low right now.

But to all those that have a positive and going to through it now wish you all the best and smooth pregnancies xxx

8 Replies

Hi Tamtam,

I've had very similar feelings and expect that I'll have more days when it just feels so unfair. Try not to be hard on yourself, you've been through a lot. We have to pay for our treatment, but that's due to my age and we knew that when I was 39, but it does seem unfair that you can't have it on the NHS because your hubby already has a child.

I really hope 2015 brings you happiness.


Thanks honey

It's just such a long road and not always a fair one.

I wish you all the joy of babies in 2015


Hi Tamtam, I have been through this quite a lot over the last year or so. I have also had a failed attempt, which hit me harder than I ever imagined. But on a positive, I'm starting to feel bit more upbeat. Christmas has not been as enjoyable as usual, if I'm honest, but I do feel better than I have. I think my best advice is take each day at a time. Don't beat yourself up about how you feel. I think most of us have probably felt the same. Write down how you feel, on here or in a diary. It is incredibly unfair but you're not alone. There are lots of people on here to talk to, who understand what you are going through.

I wish you all the best for 2015. Best wishes x


Hi Tamtam, I find it tough too. It's not silly to feel upset. Struggling to have a baby is hard and there are days when reminders of what we would like to have seem to be everywhere! You have been through a lot this year. Take care of yourself x


Hi tamtam I totally understand how you feel. We had a negative test result today, our 2nd round. I am devastated we went shopping to take our minds off it and get out the house but as I passed the nursery sale items positioned by the tills I couldn't move. No tears just standing in complete space, was awful ended up dumping my basket and going for a coffee before coming home. Came on, during the way home so now I'm in bed doubling up the painkillers and not even going to be able to drown the sorrows this New Year's Eve. some days as good some not some good, but yr not on yr own. Here's to a more successful or even calmer 2015 ladies, new year well wishes to you all xx


Hello Tamtam

Sorry to hear you have had a tough time the fertility journey can be very unfair and a struggle. Last Christmas was hard for us because I had a negative test on 21 December. This Christmas was even harder because of my ectopic pregnancy. We have just been taking one day at a time and I really think this is the best thing to do. We all want a baby so much that are hearts just seem to pick up on everything. I was thinking the other day 10 years ago I never really noticed new born babies if I saw a pregnant lady I thought nothing of it and I don't remember seeing that many. Now it's totally different there has been countless times when I have cried in a shop, cafe because of seeing a new born baby. Only yesterday when I was in Costa Coffee there was a fairly new born baby who was crying and that's all I could hear I was trying not to look because I knew I would burst into tears. So you are definitely not alone. I think we just have to go with our feelings. I think with all the crying I have done over the last few weeks it has actually helped with my emotional pain. So don't be so hard on yourself you need to take care of yourself. Wishing you happiness for 2015. Tasha x


Thanks Tash....

Here wishing you the best of luck for 2015 sending lots of baby dust your ways .

Good luck

Lots of love

Tam xx


Thanks Ladies for the support xxx


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