4 year old, toileting issues

[Yummymum1]

My 4 soon to be 5 in a few weeks keeps messing himself, hes ok with doing wees in the loo but it's poos he won't.I have had to put him in pull ups after he gets in from school as at school he must hold it in, we can send him in pants and he never messes there.

The doc has diagnosed him with constipation and he has been having one laxative sachet a day alongside some liquid laxative. The liquid he's fine with taking it just the sachets he won't drink the drinks with them in.

We are struggling to get him to drink anyway he leaves most drinks we give him and I don't know how to get him to drink. We have tried new cups which the novelty wears off after he has used it a couple of times, again tried diff drinks, milkshakes, apple juice and again after a couple of times he gets bored of it and leaves it. His usual drink is diluted juice which sometimes he will have but moat of the time he will have like a quarter of a fruit shoot bottle and that's it, he doesn't like drinking from cups unless there's a straw in it. He has had water infections a couple of times and the doc thought it was due to constipation.

I think the main reason he isnt going to the loo is lack of drinks to move things along.

I contacted the health visitor and they suggested the laxatives and they advised sitting him on the loo or potty after meals, he tends to mess of an evening after teatime so we have tried sitting him on the loo or.potty after then and he just won't, he gets upset runs off or pushes me away.

I have felt really upset and down about this whole situation and have been suffering with stress related illness as I worry he will never do this. I don't know what to do next as nothing seems to be working at all.

[Yaleamanda]

Have a read and watch of these

ERIC are a bowel and bladder charity, great website and fab helpline/email

eric.org.uk

There is also bladder and bowel UK they are similar to ERIC. bbuk.org.uk

NHS poo nurses taking about movicol and how to use

thepoonurses.uk/

Great article

bornready.uk/blog/the-mecha...

Different video about constipation

youtu.be/pNagQup0Upg(Not working as expected?)

[Iffets]

Hi, just to say I sympathize with you. My 7yr old still has pull ups to do his poos and I am not rushing him as I fear constipation. He used to poo 3x a week, had no issues when pooing, just would not do it in the loo. He now has daily bowel movements as we saw a naturopath who tested and gave him probiotics and diet change (wheat, dairy, egg free) ..he is much better but says he will poo in the loo when ready. I know he will one day..already he is maturing and it should happen this year. Maybe keep yr boy in pull ups so that he doesn't withold and don't rush him.Maybe try homemade ice lollies to get him to drink more? Like coconut water or very diluted apple juice? Or brothy noodle soups?

[Le15]

I would cut a hole at the back of the nappy and let the poo go on the floor. I appreciate that sounds horrendous but it worked with mine. When it went on the floor I said ‘oh naughty poo’ in a joke way and he watched me clear it into the potty. I did it again and again without at any point putting pressure on my son. I totally stopped asking if he needed a poo or mentioning poos and on evenings and weekend tried to keep him naked from the waist down as long as possible. The first step is getting them to poo outside of the nappy - it doesn’t matter where it goes (I know, the mess!) but then you can focus on the poo going in the correct place. It’s really hard to relax and now put pressure on the situation but that’s the key - we also didn’t give much praise when he got it right because this also seemed to put pressure on the situation. Just ‘ok, great’ then moved on with our day. It means staying at home a lot for the first month but I promise he will get it. Best of luck!!! Xx

[Le15 in reply to Le15]

also keep on with the laxatives - my son is 4 6 and has been on them for 3 years, it really helps

[Yummymum1]

Well today he actually drank 3 drinks when he got in and one had his laxative mixed in it and he didn't seem to notice.He did a poo after he had a bath I'd dressed him in his pjs and he said what's this it feels wet and brown haha, there was nothing brown on him so I do think he knows what he's doing.

I checked and he had done a proper one, so I took him Into the loo and sat him on the toilet even tho he pushed away i managed to sit him down. I ripped a side of his pull up and showed him when the poo dropped into the look, let him look lol and then flush.

I let him spray down his toilet seat clean and flush the poo away and wash hands.

I have told him to try tell me when he does ine next and we cam do the same thing, he doesn't have to pull his nappy down as he's scared to do that on the loo, we can just rip it on the loo after he's done one. I'm gonna try this for a while to get the feeling for him of sitting on the loo,.he mentioned a poo story I read him called poo goes to poo land so will read that to him again a few times.

Does all this seem like a good idea do you think?

[BrumMum1]

Have you tried him on movicol plain? It works in the same way as Laxido and cosmocol but it doesn't have the same taste.

My LO wouldn't drink cosmocol "lemon and lime" and used to throw it into the carpet/in toilets/on the rug and it was so stressful!

A change in flavour may help...

[Yummymum1 in reply to BrumMum1]

It's weird cos sometimes he actually drinks it.He's done 2 proper ones today in his pull up though and again he didn't tell me at all, I keep saying when you are doing it tell Mummy and we can sit you on the loo or potty , he is got upset and pushes me away when I try to, he said he doesn't like it and when I said why he says he doesn't know.

[BrumMum1]

I'm glad today was a better day for him, in terms of actually going twice.Can be so tough at times, but your dedication to him is so obvious - you're both doing well.

ERIC are brilliant in terms of advice so maybe consult them over toileting issues? It may be that he needs a mild stimulant first thing in the morning so that by the time school is finished, he's ready to do a poo at home.

ERIC will advise...but stay strong.