My 7 year old is usually wet. Sometimes she has big bladder emptying accidents, but more often it is smallish leaks. It sounds odd but I no longer have any idea how often or how much she is wetting herself which is making our engagement with the continence clinic really hard. The problem is she will not admit to anyone when she has had an accident. I can spot the big ones- she soaks through everything or stands up leaving a wet patch on her seat, but other days she will comes home from school with dry pants on and claim to have had no accidents all day, but her clothes are stained and smell of wee. She has been teased at school when other kids have noticed her wet pants when she is doing cartwheels or on the climbing frame or getting changed for PE. Other days she will be wet when we get home and say when I ask her that it has just happened, but I suspect that is not the case, or that it is just the last of a series of accidents throughout the day. We have tried allsorts of things. She has to drink measured amounts of water during the day. Constipation has been excluded. She is taken to the loo every break time. Reward charts don't work- she just lies to get the rewards. I have tried checking her once an hour to get an idea of what is happening but then she remains dry... I put her in incontinence pads a month ago which has solved one issue in that her outer clothes stay dry unless she has a big accident, but she still doesn't change them and they can be quite smelly by the end of a day. We have asked her to tell a trusted grown up with a code word. We have secreted a change of clothes and clean pads in the disabled loo at school and she can just slip out if she needs to and change without telling anyone. Zilch. She has NEVER changed herself without someone spotting an accident and telling her to change. I keep explain I g to her that the accidents are not the problem but the hiding them is. She just carried on lying. I am at the end of my tether because the continence team cannot get an idea of what is going on because she completely denies there is a problem. yesterday I really lost my temper and took all of her toys and books away because when I asked her if she had put a pad in she told me that daddy had said she didn't have to wear them any more because she hadn't had an accident for the whole of the Easter holidays. A big lie. Daddy hadn't said that at all, especially as she had wet herself in his car on her way back from gymnastics the day before (wet patch on the car seat- more than the pad could cope with- and she had apparently been for a wee 20 minutes earlier).
Any advice? I get nothing from the GP.