Feeling stuck..

[Endoisapain91]

Hi all 👋🏼

Feeling a bit like I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place at the moment…

I was diagnosed via surgery about 2.5 years ago. My Endo flared up after coming off the pill after 10 years due to it impacting my mental health.

I have started noticing it really affecting my day to day life now. I have a constant dull ache on the right hand side of my pelvic area that can head down my leg. I have it on my bladder which means needing to pee up to 5 times an hour. I can’t do high intensity exercise as it causes a flare up. And even intercourse is starting to be impacted.

I suppose I’m feeling out of control now.

It’s on my mind everyday at the moment. I’m constantly worrying about how bad it’s getting.

I’m scared that it’s destroying my ovaries and potentially ruining any change of getting pregnant in the future.

I’m so angry that the only thing to help it is the one thing that I know impacts my mental health.

Not sure if I’m looking for advice here, or just ladies who can relate 😢

[Giraffegreen]

Hi, I can also relate to your situation. I cannot tolerate any birth control as it ruins my mental health and it really can lead to this feeling of helplessness and trapped. Have you gone to see anyone about worsening symptoms? This does seem to be giving you a lot of anxiety, so getting yourself medically checked might help.

What might help you constantly thinking about it would be speaking to someone about anxiety, I'm currently awaiting CBT myself because medical things got too much for me to be able to live my life.

You're strong and try to take each day as it comes, you're welcome to message me if you need it

[Endoisapain91 in reply to Giraffegreen]

I have an appointment booked in November so we’ll see what he says 🤞🏼 and good point about CBT - maybe that will help.

Really appreciate the response and the offer to reach out - nice to know we’re not alone!

[KittyTherapy]

Hi,

Would you now be a candidate for tests and surgery again if it has regrown? (If that's what your wanting) x

[Endoisapain91 in reply to KittyTherapy]

Yeah I would be open to it for sure, but considering my last one was only 2.5 years ago, I don’t want to have to get it done so frequently! Xx

[EndoCoeliac_Woman]

Your symptoms are the same as mine. Some days I cannot fall asleep for the pain in the leg. I cannot sit so I had to buy a standing desk to work. I loved running but now I only do machines in the gym because running cashed me almost to faint for the pain. I also went through a period where I was constantly thinking that I won't be able to live without pain anymore. That I'll have to schedule my holidays away from the period (hoping that it is regular that month, which is rarely the case). That my partner would be better off with someone 'healthy'.

Well. I found my way around it. I'm kind with myself. I don't force myself to do things on bad days. At the same time, I try to push myself to go out wehn I'm not too bad because friends make me happy. It's like for people who got a cancer diagnosis. They say:"You have to get used to a new normal".

I'm not saying give up. The exact opposite. Go on fighting for your life. But stop being angry when doing so. Notice the good days. It's hard, some months are very bad and you get that feeling of:"Oh my God how am I surviving this?". But then you might have few better ones, where you can function decently. Focus on these ones.

Will we be 100% functional again? Probably not for more than 1 day.

Will we be knocked out by this?

No way ❤️

[Endoisapain91 in reply to EndoCoeliac_Woman]

Thank you so much - you’re right, it definitely won’t beat it. I’m glad you’ve found a method of coping, I will definitely give it a go and appreciate the good days xx