My story. Can you relate?

[Bgrant]

My story

I'm writing this more for myself and I'd like to know your story/symptoms.

I have a lap booked on the 19th Feb and I'm starting to get nervous.

Iv had painful periods since I started around 13, I'd be up all night for a couple of nights with a hot water bottle and endless painkillers. They got heavier as the years went on. I have horrific diarrhea but the position of sitting on the loo for some reason gave me some release of the pain so Iv spent many hours on the loo not even needing to go. I pass blood clots every month which aren't the nicest and make me feel disgusting. A few years ago when I was 19/20 I began to have awful anxiety, awful stomach problems and throwing up daily I do believe Alot of it was stress from the job I was in but I couldn't eat and couldn't get a grip on my health. My biggest worry was not being able to get up in the morning I was exhausted and felt awful. Iv tried lots of contraceptive pills as well as the injection but found it upset my body like I could feel my body rejecting it I kept bleeding throughout the month and if I'm honest if you can plan 4 days of hell that's better then the unpredictable cycle the contraceptive gave me. Iv been for a few examinations for swollen lymphnodes downstairs and infections that were never diagnosed and I go for a wee more than anyone should even if I sip water I need go in ten minutes. I have a ridiculously sensitive gag reflex But this is just me? Nothing to worry about?

Throughout the years iv caught horrible viruses, flu, colds I up until a couple of months ago I worked full time with horses so I was constantly on the go, up early and late finishing (now I work in horse insurance so full time office job) the periods came and went the build up to them is awful I have a migraine about 4 days before my period that lasts a couple of days, I'm horribly anxious like there's a Bomb ready to go off and then I start spotting a couple of days before my period. The twinges and sudden claps of shooting pain will begin and I know by then I need to get everything ready to hibernate as much as I can. This has been all iv ever known up until about 6 months ago, its never crossed my mind that something could be wrong. Also I want to make clear because this has been normal for me I haven't been bed bound or missed days of work because I thought everyone was doubled over on intense amount of pain. Around 6 months ago I started getting pains around two weeks into my cycle, now I know through thorough research it must be ovulation. One day the shooting pain started no where near my period on my right hand side it was awful I was at work and managed to drive myself home. My boyfriend drove me to the hospital and we sat on A&E I'm not one for a fuss but the pain had scared me so much I went on to see a consultant who was convinced my appendix had burst but all the test came back clear I was sent home to go back in the morning for a ultrasound and everything was fine and nothing to see. The pain felt like a ache for about a week after and then slowly dissolved. The build up to my periods have been getting worse, lots of twinges and cramping all the way through the month. Laying here now I can feel both ovaries not so much pain but just that they are there like tugging. I had the flu during my last period and I generally thought I wasn't going to make it, lying on the bathroom floor felt like the safest place in the world. Before Christmas I went for a smear test, a few months it's been in the back of my mind that somethings not right and now 25 I got my letter this you so booked and went to the doctors. The nurse thought my discharge was abnormal and she asked me how were my periods. Well... It felt like someone had asked me the most real and genuine question that I had ever heard in all my life I completely broke down and I let someone see my vulnerable side and told her everything she booked me to see a doctor a week later and she reffered me to a gynaecologist, thankfully I have private health care at work so I'm so blessed to not have to Wait long

I have read and read and read all of these posts, watched you tube videos, Facebook groups and now I'm booked in my fear is that this may be another test of no answers if it's endo well it will be shit but at least there's a name for it, I wouldn't be weak or just making a mountain out of a molehill I hope they find something that could even make sense of some of the symptoms. I feel like my periods are closing in on me like there's only 6 days in a month where I'm normal but I do a bit to much on them and struggle the day after.

This Is a wonderful forum and if I'm diagnosed with anything or nothing there's a brilliant support network here. Take care of yourselves whereever you are on your journey xx

[princessk09]

Hey, don’t be nervous for the lap, it’s honestly not that scary and I have a massive fear of hospitals. You get put to sleep in like 5 seconds and then wake up in recovery. You may feel groggy but everyone is different as I was so high and alert from the morphine haha.

I can relate to a lot of your story as I’ve suffered with pain all my teen life and I’m nearly 20 now. I’ve tried so many contraceptive treatment until now where my gynae has put me on zoladex for 6 months to see if it works.

Don’t worry I have a sensitive gag reflex but I don’t think it’s related to endo.

The pains around your ovaries could be cysts forming and bursting whilst an egg is being released. I get a dull heavy feeling a lot as if something is dragging my uterus down or sat on it

During my lap, they found endo, a cyst and a pelvic infection that could have been caused by a cyst bursting. However your symptoms sounds a lot like endometriosis but it can be managed as your gynae will work with you to find a treatment that works including lifestyle changes, hormones etc. Most women do find relief after surgery.

If you ever need someone to talk to, you can always message me xxxx

[Milvy]

Hi hun, first thing I'd like to say is you're definitely not making a mountain out of a mole hill nor is what you're going through easy, in the slightest. We feel its normal because we know nothing else but on this forum we can lean on others for support and not have to act strong xxx

What you described either sounds like endometriosis or cysts. What you've described sounds exactly like what I had minus the diarrhoea. At 18 I started suffering with horrendous pain in my left ovary area which came with nausea/vomiting, wanting to go to the bathroom, pain down my leg and back. I brushed it off for about a year and continued going to uni, out and about pretending like I was completely fine. I thought it was normal. Until things got so bad I was bed bound for a few days a month around ovulation time, every month. I googled around and convinced myself it was just ovulation pain. It got so bad I just had to go see a Dr and thank God I did. I was fortunate enough that my Dr took me seriously and straight away referred me to a specialist. I was booked for a laporoscopy at 19 and it was found I did indeed have endometriosis - unfortunately it made my pain worse but atleast I had the reassurance of knowing what I had.

I can tell you now, at the age of 26 I no longer have that youthful outlook and ability to cope with the pain thinking it's normal. My work used to take me all over the world and I remember sitting on planes, in meetings, limping around offices etc feeling like I was about to pass out from the pain and then having to rush to the bathroom or an empty room just to be on my own so I could let out a real sigh of pain for no one to hear. At that time I didn't even let me work place know I had Endometriosis, I just dealt with it the best way I knew - pretending I was fine. With my recent job I realised I had to let them know and after a year had to make the hardest decision of leaving work due to the pain. It has been absolutely great and glad I took the descion to leave.

I've had two laparoscopies. There's honestly nothing to fear. It's a quick enough procedure and you'll come out of it with a name to your pain - fingers crossed! Hopefully that should be of a relief to you. In my case my laparoscopies didn't help with the pain instead increased it but every one is different and react differently to different things. I know people who've felt so much better after their laps.

How much ' 6 days in a month I feel normal' resonates with me! Don't they just feel like the best days! Fingers crossed your lap brings you more days of normality! Xxx

[Thecraftyadder]

You are absolutely doing the right thing! I think your a&e trip sounds like a cyst rupture. It happened to me at work in 2017. I first went to the doctor about abdominal pain at 19. I always had bad periods, clots, diarrhea etc. They prescribed me pills for pain and heavy bleeding and bowel problems but never referred me anywhere. In my late 20's a cyst was found and I got referred and had a laparoscopy which said nothing was wrong. Symptoms continued to worsen till I was getting just a few 'normal' days a month. Last year I saw a private specialist and finally got diagnosed. The relief of lying in bed afterwards in my hospital room thinking 'they found something! They found something' was immense. When I found out where my endometriosis was it was like the piece that made sense of the jigsaw of symptoms I'd had for 18 years!

There will be a reason for all this. You've done the right thing by explaining all your problems. It sounds like your GP has listened which is great. Keep pushing for a diagnosis! It will be worth it in the end

[Bgrant]

Thank you everyone, so nice to know others are going through the same thing and not feeling like such an alien xx