guidelines for the group!: so the group is... - Drink Free

Drink Free

1,597 members645 posts

guidelines for the group!

32 Replies

so the group is intended to support people to help reduce their alcohol intake …doesn’t say you must have intention to stop completely! (Though I intend to) supporting individual experiences!

I’m quite frustrated tonight…I am doing well on my own journey..just finished my dry weekend. Combination of chatting to folk on here and using my apps I feel like I’m making progress… will get some alco frees tomorrow.

Looking forward to feeling a fresh week!

32 Replies
CP2710 profile image
CP2710

👍👍👍

I have really enjoyed feeling fresh and energetic for my kids this weekend. Haven’t thought about alcohol the same as I did couple of weeks back. Yes, 1 day at a time is the key. Take care.

Thanks 😄 same to you also! Well done a full week dry. I feel I could drink tonight… but I’m going do my best not to. Just need switch this frame of mine into something more productive.

SoberDrunk1 profile image
SoberDrunk1

Absolutely. But just be safe when you are trying to moderate. Be honest with yourself. Consider the safety of yourself and others around you.

I hope you do find it useful and it does feel supportive to you. I feel like it has helped, even just letting go of that weight on my shoulders and saying to someone else I drink far more than I should. I’ve known in myself for a long time but never found anywhere I could open up about it. I did on here and now finding ways to control the situation and move forward in a more positive and productive way.

I’m pleased I didn’t drink again tonight. Glad I went to shop this morning and stocked up on diet fizz pop for now. Never usually drink pop (unless it’s small mixer with spirits) so it’s felt like a good change. 😊👍

sorry to interrupt i had no intention to drink tonight but i had bad indegestion so i had one big glass of mulled wine i had in which had in i dont really like it but it did the job got rid of indegestion pain trouble is as i havnt drank since friday it went to my head a bit and i wanted another i never had anything i have access to alcohol but its not mine well i guess thats kinda good i did say no but i couldv tried a indegestion tablet 😟

in reply to

I’m not sure how to respond chick but I’ve read your text 😊 can only suggest gaviscon or milk there lol how you feeling today ?

in reply to

hi my indegestion went and ok today thanks but went shopping with mam and i wanted to buy some alcohol i didnt dare lol as its only 4 days since she accused me of been drunk when i tripped over the radiator drip bowl she did knock it herself with her toes yesterday tho 🙄i asked her if she wantex cuppa tea tonight i said im having cocoa she said ill have a beer havnt had much liquid today i said it will dehydrate you have orange knowing full well sged have offered me one well probably, well i made my cocoa thinking i couldv had a beer but thought well idv only wanted more so whats the point, i enjoyed my cocoa and double decker bar but now ive headach not too bad tho hows it going for you xx

Rosepetal60 profile image
Rosepetal60 in reply to

ooh Cocoa, not had that for months. Tempting 🙂

thank you yes it was just a minor set back, im thinking about cranbury weslydale cheese now lol but cant have any my indegestion will come back no foor until tomorror, hope you sleep well im tured anyway ill have early night 🤗🌛🌟

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14

I'm here because my brother is an alcoholic. I've watched him going down hill. This is heart breaking as you can imagine.

I am hoping to gain some insight.

Everyone is going to bring something different to the table based on where they are coming from. I won't be responding much, just reading.

Respect for each other is key. People helping and supporting each other is so important.

🐬

in reply to Dolphin14

hi dolphin sorry your brother has become dependant, has he refused to go to AA the first step is for him to want to stop, im not a alcoholic but ive had binge drinking issues on off, did something trigger his drinking off i used to self medicate as they call it with alcohol not too much but too much like bottle wine maby one n half or big bottle cider never spirits, sending hugs 🤗🌟

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to

We grew up in an emotionally abusive home. His self medicating has been going on for decades. He thinks having a 12 pack of beer is a " non drinking" day. I say this with 100% honestly. This is what he believes.

His perception is he has no problem so doesn't need help.

Sending hugs back to you

❤️🐬

in reply to Dolphin14

hi, it’s tough to hear them be in so much denial. I too grew up in an abusive environment, emotionally and physically. I have a brother who battles heroin addiction of abit 25 years, our parents were violent alcoholics (lost my dad to alcohol). My brother used heroin to self medicate… I won’t discuss on here the depths but if you want to personal message anytime I can listen and share 😊

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to

That's really heavy stuff. I'm sorry for what you have been through. I'm sorry to read about your brother's addiction.

Thank you for the offer to listen. I will keep that in mind :)

in reply to Dolphin14

It’s so hard for everyone around the person who has an addiction. Still only recently I had to let go of my brother (aged 45) once again as he gets yet another prison sentence, and also my nephew who I was going foster.

You can lead a horse to water but can’t make them drink! 1 thing I’ve learned both professionally and personally is…we can’t be everyone’s saviour, we can only offer them to the tools.

Hope he sees a way forward for you and your family. X

HeavyFoot profile image
HeavyFoot

Thank you, Moonpig. I did check with the description of the forum’s purpose and it does state that it is about helping people cut down as well as stop.

I’d be interested to know of what evidence there is that heavy drinkers or alcoholics can cut down permanently to, say, the prescribed limits of 14 units a week. It runs counter to my experience of myself and people around me. Bad habits kick back in after a time.

It’s a bit like saying “ I only want to be a bit addicted to heroin”.

in reply to HeavyFoot

This group may be challenging at times as we all have so many different experiences. It’s interesting to learn how people are moving forward.

It’s only when we realise we have a problem we can look towards supportive methods to understand ourselves. I’m sure anyone who accessed this group, did so with recognition of that.

in reply to

hi ive been kooking stuff up this was one i googled i also did a test on how addicted am i it wasnt a great score seems im quite addicted even tho a few weeks ago i went 2 weeks with none then its just yoyo ing with me stopping starting not drinking so much then thinking im in control but not so ill do what i call a big detox see how long it lasts convinced im in control and glad ive decided to stop then it comes over me out the blue to buy some i am still working on been a controlled drinker 😟

😟
in reply to

hi hun, I’ve not read that but if I was to read studies, I’d use google scholar and more recent research as the papers have been peer reviewed 😘Having said, research like from the AA is a tried and tested method. I will be reading the book online, specifically a section that another member has mentioned to me. I am very open to aspects of the AA despite what people think. But for now I’m learning about myself first x

in reply to

hi yes good point i just noticed the date lol sleep well ill be going up soon at least i get early nights when not drinking 🌛xx

in reply to

I am loving the sleep I seem to be getting. It’s so hard to fall sleep though, I find! My mind works over time. But love waking fresh. (I don’t alway wake fresh though because of pain in my face. That had made me think in past…well if I wake this rough anyway, I might as well enjoy a drink)!

Goodnight chick. Reflection is good 😊

in reply to

try sleep now been on here can keep you too alert 🤗

in reply to HeavyFoot

I don’t know how to share links on this phone, I get a new 1 tomorrow. If you look on google scholar…there is research on there about whether heavy drinkers can go back to casual ! I have only briefly looked but I’ll be back on reading when I get chance. An article below was of interest…it gets updated 2016 I think. And cited by many.

Prediction of controlled drinking by alcoholics and problem drinkers.H Rosenberg - Psychological Bulletin, 1993 - psycnet.apa.org… factors as predictors of controlled drinking(CD) by alcoholics and problem drinkers: severity … about controlled drinking and abstinence, previous treatment, pretreatment drinking style, …

hi,

I wouldn’t of thought that once it’s determined that one is an alcoholic or drug addict, there would be a way to use causally. Once it becomes an addiction there isn’t that option there sadly. And it isn’t good to think that there can be alternatives for addiction…for example a heroin addict saying they will stick to cannabis instead as it isn’t as harmful …that’s why, in a way I want to lose the use of alco free…

I don’t believe I have an addiction…but know I can’t use alternatives, I need to look at the time I want a drink…lose the habit of thinking it’s the norm to finish a day with a glas of something…reach for a glass when stressed …ect ect…

Thanks for sharing your experience! 😊

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14

Thank you so much for your kind response.

As a family we are not in a position to do anything. It's up to him to decide. It's very sad :(

in reply to Dolphin14

it’s a very hard thing to watch and not be able to help. I hope you can find some support within this group and hope at some point they seek help. X

Dolphin14 profile image
Dolphin14 in reply to

Thank you Moonpig. The support is coming through with these kind understanding replies

🐬

fauxartist profile image
fauxartist

I love the fact that this group is exactly what it is...a safe place to talk about our journey... I'm not one to beat someone over the head about drinking, I don't judge anyone for doing exactly what I did... we are all where we need to be, and doing the best we can for where we are in life. I am open and honest about myself and can only speak for myself. I'm not here to recruit anyone's sobriety, just to share my own. Support is exactly what is paramount. What ever choices each person needs to make for themselves is their own and nobody else. If someone questions and is looking for answers.... only they have the answers for themselves, and with all of us sharing... it may help someone to decide what steps they choose to take.

in reply to fauxartist

thank you for that post. I couldn’t have said that any better.

Think I come across blunt at times or defensive. I’m just working my through my own thoughts and using here to be a kind of information gathering and diary. And now also hoping that after hearing others share, I can offer an empathetic ear 😊

fauxartist profile image
fauxartist in reply to

Your doing great by working through stuff, that's important .

in reply to fauxartist

thanks you 😊

You may also like...

Quick update before people think I've disappeared through not being able handle the group debates 🙂

love feeling fresh as a daisy doing my dairy on apps and searching for activities. Must admit, I...

I’m starting my quitting alcohol journey…

don’t know if my liver is damaged. I’m too scared to find out. I’m too ashamed to see my GP. I...

reflection since New Year’s Day

on my alcohol use since New Year’s Day…from using these apps I can see patterns emerging. I’m...

Sober night on the town

cocktails we moved onto bars and I said nope I’m finished with drinking for the night and proceeded...

Moderation or completely alcohol free?

guess I’m asking for advice on how to moderation or wondering if I should go completely alcohol...